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theabortionator
April, 2025

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Worst Names for Children

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lurking
Posts: 2227 - Karma: 6,876
What does NS think is the worst name for a child. I'm thinking somewhere along the likes of Weiner or Twat.

Discuss
11 years ago
162 72
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lurking
Posts: 2227 - Karma: 6,876
Inb4 someone says OP
11 years ago
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Miomo
Posts: 4302 - Karma: 14,137
A boy named Sue

also, Adolf
11 years ago
10 1
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Miomo
Posts: 4302 - Karma: 14,137
A boy named Sue

also, Adolf
11 years ago
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-MK-
Posts: 3253 - Karma: 5,332
Marlene, dick, simon, harrison
11 years ago
0 0
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Wampire
Posts: 1217 - Karma: 4,685
Wiener or Twat? i think its safe to say OP is 12
11 years ago
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acualywasdolan
Posts: 1172 - Karma: -747
Chad
11 years ago
4 9
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LoathesRaisins
Posts: 3612 - Karma: 4,735
Alexander
11 years ago
0 0
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Anathema
Posts: 21048 - Karma: 5,062
AGNUS


(cringes)
11 years ago
3 0
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ChillTeenDad420
Posts: 1858 - Karma: 5,512
chalupa batman
11 years ago
12 0
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theBearJew
Posts: 10951 - Karma: 15,634
AlexSupertrampAlexander


Alex is way better.
11 years ago
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yangumane
Posts: 1816 - Karma: 3,349
OP's Facebook

Logan Schnur likes:
Other
Selena Gomez
Adam Sandler
Megan Fox
Oreo
Xbox
11 years ago
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connecticunt
Posts: 847 - Karma: 1,541
the name Mark is a deal breaker for me
11 years ago
1 1
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Barefootin_Fiend
Posts: 7618 - Karma: 4,727
According to Maxim magazine....

1. Rutherford
2. Apple

3. Floyd (Unless you know for sure he's going to be a fighter.)

4. Kermit

5. Nevaeh (Yes, it's "Heaven" spelled backwards....which means your child is anti-heaven, a.k.a. Hell. So just call her Hell. "Hell" is a cool name.)

6. Cinnamon

7. Dabney

8. Optimus

9. Thor

10. Moses

11. Delano

12. Abner

13. Sandwich

14. Balki

15. Renesmee

16. P.P.

17. Legolas

18. Typhoid

19. Adolph

20. New Cher

21. Tonto

22. Glenn (Have you ever met a baby named Glenn? And yet there are adults named Glenn. What the hell?)

23. Spanky

24. Skrillex

25. Lt. Assblast

26. Soupy

27. Fitzgerald (Unless it's a girl, because then it's adorable.)

28. Ulysses

29. Whisper

28. Six

30. Truman

31. Mercedes Benz

32. Baby

33. Bigsby

34. Elton

35. Constance

36. Kawn-stanz!

37. Ochocinco

38. Filthy Jonas

39. LOL

40. Rib Eye

41. Jennni

42. Jeniy

43. Jen-E

44. Jennyb (silent B)

45. Cornelius

46. Ziggy

47. B.J.

48. Octopussy

49. Pinocchio

50. Jimminy

51. Hermione

52. Indiana (It only worked once, and only because he was Han Solo)

53. Han

54. Velcro

55. Ke$ha

55. Piers

56. Morgan

57. Piers Morgan

58. Sweet Pea

59. Sweat Pea

60. Anakin

61. Isthmus

62. Fidel

63. Danthew

64. Flo

65. Ebenezer

66. Precious (Name her "Push" instead.)

67. Kandy

68. Siobhan (Because no one will ever know how to spell or pronounce it, including your child until he/she turns 12.)

69. Swerve

70. DMX

71. Poppy

72. Ernestine

73. Cherry

74. Emilio

75. Hollis

76. Kel

77. Mickey Rourke

78. Mavis

79. VH1 Presents

80. Goose

81. Katniss

82. Finger

83. Pooter

84. Zoo

85. Baxter

86. Pancreas

87. Dances With Wolves

88. Duck-Duck-William

89. Colon

90. Sassafras

91. Beulah

92. Ralph (but make everyone pronounce it weird)

93. Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy

92. C.C.C.C.C.C.

93. Jazzy

94. Jazzer

95. Jazzest

96. Caspert

97. Pinky

98. Otho

99. Milo

100. The Walrus
11 years ago
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maximiliaan
Posts: 7711 - Karma: 2,857
remembers me off:
[video]http://youtu.be/edZjdgU0asM[/img]
11 years ago
0 0
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steezburgereddie
Posts: 1059 - Karma: 1,945
SpssChad


I take it you're mad about being named chad.
11 years ago
0 0
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maximiliaan
Posts: 7711 - Karma: 2,857
maximiliaanremembers me off:
http://youtu.be/edZjdgU0asM[/img][/QUOTE]

[video]http://youtu.be/edZjdgU0asM
11 years ago
0 0
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O.G.Surachai
Posts: 334 - Karma: 84
Abcde, pronounced Ab-se-duh.
11 years ago
0 0
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whoa-dere
Posts: 10596 - Karma: 7,105
gaylord
11 years ago
0 0
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DayMan
Posts: 4707 - Karma: 8,804
My dad is a doctor and once had a patient named Placenta. Not even joking. Placenta.
11 years ago
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~~~~~~~~
Posts: 2345 - Karma: 2,104
Met a girl named rainbow today, poor kid.
11 years ago
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saskskier
Posts: 4774 - Karma: 10,005
One of my good friends went to school with a "Rhoda Dyck".
11 years ago
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Charlie_Kelly
Posts: 11955 - Karma: 12,308
There's a girl at my school that likes to be called Saphire. I have no idea what her real name is. Also, she broke a toilet by fucking some kid on it, so maybe a stripper name is appropriate for her...
11 years ago
0 0
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JordanButtfart
Posts: 1013 - Karma: 3,027
RedPandaMy dad is a doctor and once had a patient named Placenta. Not even joking. Placenta.


I love Placenta soup!
11 years ago
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theabortionator
Posts: 52605 - Karma: 174,404
nobody like OP. Forever alone
11 years ago
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.Witta
Posts: 114 - Karma: 262
Caleb, Levi, Curtis, grant
11 years ago
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Charlie_Kelly
Posts: 11955 - Karma: 12,308
Skyler
11 years ago
0 0
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mccdiggity
Posts: 27 - Karma: 100
I had a teacher in high school who named her kid Seven because it was her favorite number
11 years ago
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notspoicey
Posts: 1167 - Karma: 1,708
connecticuntthe name Mark is a deal breaker for me


11 years ago
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Shredsterr
Posts: 2090 - Karma: 6,930
chicken's a pretty shitty name.
11 years ago
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act.resist
Posts: 8875 - Karma: 513
Helen, Trudy, Dolores, Lance, Kieth, Bob...
11 years ago
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Parrish
Posts: 8695 - Karma: 1,010
Andrew
11 years ago
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Cambrewski
Posts: 320 - Karma: 3,136
Drew Peacock
11 years ago
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Laurent.
Posts: 10056 - Karma: 25,311
Every year in The Netherlands a list is published with every name given to baby's in the previous year. Journalists dive in to try and find the worst offenders.

Highlights of last year in include a Chastitty (with that spelling) Heavenly-Presious-Fate and the fair share of designer brands such as Louis Vuitton and Gucci (Usually followed by 'Hope' or 'Precious').
11 years ago
1 0
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Parrish
Posts: 8695 - Karma: 1,010
ParrishAndrew


Forgot to give a legitimate reason. There are so many kids with this fucking name. Like weird names are bad, but I remember having the same name with like 3 other kids in like 3rd grade and it sucks. Any name that has a fuckton of them sucks.
11 years ago
0 0
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El_Barto.
Posts: 11661 - Karma: 24,358
ParrishForgot to give a legitimate reason. There are so many kids with this fucking name. Like weird names are bad, but I remember having the same name with like 3 other kids in like 3rd grade and it sucks. Any name that has a fuckton of them sucks.


I had a cladd in HS with 5 other nicks. I shit you you not, 6 out of like 35 kids were named nick.
11 years ago
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Mr.Huck
Posts: 6096 - Karma: 14,903
Very worst thing you could name your kid is Oops.

I think the last name plays a big part too.


Worst name of people I knew were:

Brothers Dick and Harry Ball.

Client was named Will Dickover and the name of his business was Dickover Enterprises.

Also, we used to make a list of funniest names we ran across. These were mutual fund investors where I used to work:

Been Chuan Wang
Kum Soon Kim
11 years ago
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,488
I had a teacher named Sandy Cox.... her husbands name was Harry lol
11 years ago
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Yaraelpoof.png
Posts: 1556 - Karma: 6,418
Tyler
11 years ago
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JordanButtfart
Posts: 1013 - Karma: 3,027
omnidataEvery year in The Netherlands a list is published with every name given to baby's in the previous year. Journalists dive in to try and find the worst offenders.

Highlights of last year in include a Chastitty (with that spelling) Heavenly-Presious-Fate and the fair share of designer brands such as Louis Vuitton and Gucci (Usually followed by 'Hope' or 'Precious').


Good to see that there is a black population in the Netherlands as well.
11 years ago
0 0
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.MASSHOLE.
Posts: 7579 - Karma: 12,732
Osama.
11 years ago
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AT-AT
Posts: 3281 - Karma: 3,258
" La - a"
Pronounced (la-dash-ah)
11 years ago
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b-kul
Posts: 4350 - Karma: 1,111
ChillTeenDad420chalupa batman


you mean best?
11 years ago
1 0
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Madzzb
Posts: 45 - Karma: 65
I knew twins named Dayquil and Nyquil, also knew some brothers names Swain and Caswain. One time I taught a kid named Crockett to ski. Who the fuck names their 11 year old Crockett?
11 years ago
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b-kul
Posts: 4350 - Karma: 1,111
^probably the same people that name their newborn crockett.
11 years ago
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Parrish
Posts: 8695 - Karma: 1,010
EatMyShartsI had a cladd in HS with 5 other nicks. I shit you you not, 6 out of like 35 kids were named nick.


That has to be the most confusing shit. You can't even really give nicknames for nick i feel like, unless you start calling dudes by their last name.
11 years ago
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.Witta
Posts: 114 - Karma: 262
whoa-deregaylord


Gaylord Focker

.WittaCaleb, Levi, Curtis, grant


I forgot about Tristan
11 years ago
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Atomika09
Posts: 104 - Karma: 746
Shaun White. That name gives me goosebumps.
11 years ago
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Bateman
Posts: 8593 - Karma: 8,600
is schnur really a name?
11 years ago
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987321654hgfd
Posts: 5133 - Karma: 5,449
Most of the new names given to children now are terrible. Everyone trying to be original and name their child something cool but almost always failing.

Purposely misspelled versions of normal names.
11 years ago
0 0
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snwbrdmilf
Posts: 22441 - Karma: 2,814
My kids go to school with many kids who have whack names. Its crazy.
11 years ago
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