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DominatorJacques
December, 2021

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My Mom Just Texted Me Saying I'm Adopted

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RimJobber
Posts: 3313 - Karma: 10,052
I'm 19 and in class right now and my mom is at work and she just sent me a text "I haven't been 100% honest with you. You're adopted"
Not sure if she's trolling me hard or if I really am
Jan 31 2014 2:11PM 955 72
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theabortionator
Posts: 48633 - Karma: 125,506
You aren't actually adopted. I know for a fact because your mom called me over back in the day but I was too drunk and crashed my truck on the way there. By the time I got out of jail you had been born.


Tell your mom I'm sorry.
Feb 2 2014 6:47PM 4 1
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RimJobber
Posts: 3313 - Karma: 10,052
Ok guys. Quick update.

So it turns out that my adoptive parents only had contact with my biological dad's friend. He lives a little bit away so I went to meet him. Turns out my parents died right after I was born. He decided he was going to take me and one of his friends sons and that kids dog on a ski trip. I just landed in CO and I met up with this super cute chick and we've been talking, but the other kid keeps on hitting on her too. Fuck him.
Will update tomorrow
Feb 2 2014 11:21PM 2 0
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whoa-dere
Posts: 10596 - Karma: 7,076
What about your sister?
Feb 2 2014 11:24PM 0 0
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-WZ-
Posts: 3600 - Karma: 6,569
well i mean if you dont get the girl you can always fall back on your sister ;)

but im sorry for you man, it must be hard taking all of that in in just a few short days
Feb 2 2014 11:24PM 0 0
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RimJobber
Posts: 3313 - Karma: 10,052
Not actually my sister
Feb 2 2014 11:25PM 0 0
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Skibumsmith
Posts: 5278 - Karma: 10,280
taking it up a notch... christ bud
Feb 2 2014 11:30PM 0 0
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-MK-
Posts: 3253 - Karma: 5,323
Wait so you just randomly go on a ski trip with this guy you just met and this other kid? Hahaha, what the fuck. And where the hell did the girl come from? inb4 your sister
Feb 2 2014 11:30PM 7 0
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RimJobber
Posts: 3313 - Karma: 10,052
Dude, I just found out I'm adopted and I wont know my real parents. I just went to visit the guy and get to see if I could find out about what they were like but I guess he's a pretty big deal or something and invited me to go with him. This last few days have been crazy, this is an awesome way to get away from it all. And its free
Feb 2 2014 11:37PM 2 1
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DR.SHRED
Posts: 2134 - Karma: 502
how did you meet chick?
Feb 2 2014 11:39PM 0 0
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RimJobber
Posts: 3313 - Karma: 10,052
She's staying at the same hotel and going to Breck skiing too. I met her in the lobby and talked with her for a bit. We're gonna hang out for a while tomorrow
Feb 2 2014 11:44PM 0 0
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DR.SHRED
Posts: 2134 - Karma: 502
tell her your story and you will get laid no doubt. and dont for get pic
Feb 3 2014 12:08AM 9 0
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CaptainObvious.
Posts: 5695 - Karma: 20,366
You're in Co and don't think to hit me up? Hurt. Its what I am. The irony? I'm leaving for Tahoe on wednesday. Apparently not to ski though.
Feb 3 2014 12:11AM 0 0
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RimJobber
Posts: 3313 - Karma: 10,052
What are you going to Tahoe for?
Feb 3 2014 12:14AM 0 0
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CaptainObvious.
Posts: 5695 - Karma: 20,366
It was originally to go skiing with my folks. Now its minus the skiing
Feb 3 2014 3:00AM 0 0
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Treblegrogg
Posts: 182 - Karma: 227
Soooo...You can fuck her?
Feb 3 2014 3:19AM 0 1
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PeppermillReno
Posts: 4126 - Karma: -589
Que?

I have nice equipment man.

I bought poles for 5 bucks at a consignment shop and they are fucking money. Only a tool spends loot on his poles. Im used to using non matching poles too cause I lose them or snap them.

I ski Volkl Shiros that are only 1 season used and in good condition. And this winter has blown so Im thrilled I didn't buy more skis. The skis I want are a newer model of what I already have but in 203 cms so now I might find 2014 models for cheap in the summer.


Strip clubs and beers aren't expensive if you are in a place where they are part of the culture and non pricey. They can't rip you off. Have you ever been to Reno or Portland? Beers in those strip clubs are fuckin 2 bucks.
Feb 3 2014 5:04AM 0 0
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RimJobber
Posts: 3313 - Karma: 10,052
How long for?
Feb 3 2014 10:37AM 0 0
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CaptainObvious.
Posts: 5695 - Karma: 20,366
Two days. I fly out Saturday morning.
Feb 3 2014 12:45PM 1 0
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elinde
Posts: 1446 - Karma: 2,735
You guys should kiss. On the lips.
Feb 3 2014 1:08PM 5 0
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Bagina
Posts: 849 - Karma: 2,883
So..... you going to fuck your "mom" in the kunt?
Feb 3 2014 1:46PM 6 0
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