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How do I tell my friend he's overweight?

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jblaski
Posts: 5561 - Karma: 1,027
So a friend and coworker of mine is overweight. I'm talking 150lbs+ overweight. We have casting for the Biggest Looser coming into town this weekend, and I really think he should try out. Huge personality and a good story to go with him.

Question is, how do you tell someone that they're fat and should try out for something like this without hurting their feelings?
May 3 2013 1:07AM
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FLBP
Posts: 1794 - Karma: 310
I'm sure if it's that bad he already realizes it, just get him stoked to lose weight on tv.
May 3 2013 1:09AM
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Anathema
Posts: 21048 - Karma: 5,061
ask him what percentage of his body weight he can bench

then ask him how much he can bench

then do the math and call him fat.
May 3 2013 1:09AM
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LoathesRaisins
Posts: 3612 - Karma: 4,735
If he's you're it shouldn't matter. Tell him he needs to lose the weight or he's going to run into some really bad problems in the future.
May 3 2013 1:09AM
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ILLinoisance
Posts: 3527 - Karma: 5,398
get it?
May 3 2013 1:10AM
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Funnel
Posts: 7808 - Karma: 1,414
Dude if he's a friend of your, tell him you're saying this as a friend, not to be condescending. Tell him that the Biggest Loser could be a great opportunity for him. You're saying this in his best interest. If he's that overweight he already knows that people realize he's overweight. Maybe get another coworker to suggest the idea with you.
May 3 2013 1:11AM
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cbj
Posts: 2114 - Karma: 1,136
Tell him to come for a run with you
May 3 2013 1:30AM
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NotoriousT.S.E
Posts: 1014 - Karma: 439
You should have already been making fun of him for being fat, thats what friends do.
May 3 2013 1:32AM
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_Garagely_
Posts: 1938 - Karma: 3,198
I doubt you could do it without making him feel bad, its just too touchy of a subject. Just tell him.
May 3 2013 1:34AM
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Stickity
Posts: 7750 - Karma: 769
just don't make a huge ass out of yourself. if you're serious about helping him start working out with him
May 3 2013 1:47AM
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HentaiHero
Posts: 298 - Karma: 1,099
only refer to him as "chunky" for like two months

eg- Sup chunky, eating some food?

He'll get the message
May 3 2013 1:48AM
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DirkaDirka
Posts: 298 - Karma: 1,079
I dunno man, EHeath seems like a pretty angry guy. Break it to him gently, unless you wanna be lunch.
May 3 2013 1:50AM
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Noha
Posts: 1281 - Karma: 2,684
Lost it
May 3 2013 2:08AM
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sNaubi
Posts: 1633 - Karma: 2,357
I feel stupid.

I thought "150lbs+ is nothing" but then I realised "aaaahhh, 150lbs above average weight...."


Anyway, get him gift card at you gym or something for his birthday and say he should start training with you. That if you go to the gym tho.

And if he get's angry or sad about it, just explain to him "like, I don't wanna say your overweight, but you are and I can't have that on my concious and not feel like I have tried to help you."
May 3 2013 3:31AM
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sNaubi
Posts: 1633 - Karma: 2,357
Realised it was searching to BL, but yeah, the explanation works anyway.
May 3 2013 3:32AM
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Turkelton
Posts: 2829 - Karma: 8,558
Maybe you should calm the fuck down and be an actual friend instead of being a dickhead and getting him to humiliate himself on TV. Got to the gym with him everyday or some shit, don't be a douchebag
May 3 2013 3:34AM
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JuliusJ
Posts: 3778 - Karma: 2,106
This. Casually ask him if we wants to come work out with you. If he says no, let me be at least for the time being. He is more than aware of his weight, I would say positive encouragement would work better than anything else.
May 3 2013 4:41AM
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louie.mirags
Posts: 6015 - Karma: 5,028
150lbs? what is he 5'4 with a vagina? is he old enough for reality tv?

join a gym with him for motivation
May 3 2013 6:03AM
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lineskier10
Posts: 11339 - Karma: 796
he has to be at least 300 pounds and at that point i hope you know youre fat and if you let it get that bad you clearly just dont give a fuck so call him a fatass, he deserves it; i had a fat friend in high school and i tormented him about it the whole time and now hes not overweight one bit
May 3 2013 6:06AM
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maximiliaan
Posts: 7710 - Karma: 2,849
hehehehe i get it ghehehe
May 3 2013 6:19AM
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SkiThe603
Posts: 5376 - Karma: 498
just ask who left the tub at the office
May 3 2013 6:39AM
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lineskier10
Posts: 11339 - Karma: 796
and the biggest loser is just about as demeaning as you can get so for sure get him to go on that
May 3 2013 7:09AM
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louie.mirags
Posts: 6015 - Karma: 5,028
making somebody feel bad about their weight is douchy.. It should be about being healthy, not what you look like. So when you consider taco bell for breakfast lunch and dinner today, remember you're just as disgusting and unhealthy.
May 3 2013 7:32AM
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Zhik
Posts: 83 - Karma: 70
Biggest looser is fucking stupid.

Just straight up tell him hes overweight and get him in the gym

biggest looser is for stupid fucks who have no motivation so they need attention and a fucking whole crew to push their asses.
May 3 2013 8:55AM
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first_rodeo
Posts: 2383 - Karma: 7,764

Dont say overweight obese fat

Just motivate him to get in shape

'Start little and build up, does he ride bikes like hiking?     etc

One of my buddies since high school has always been a big guy, linebacker build and i think he saw the weight as keeping him in the friendzone and preventinghim from going bigger than 5s

Now hes down like 100lbs  and everyone else that was skinny is getting thick

May 3 2013 9:22AM
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Huck_Norris
Posts: 11487 - Karma: 18,627
If you haven't been calling him fat for years, I refuse to believe you're actually friends.

I have a friend who used to be a soccer star. Ran all day, kid was fit as fuck. Then after he graduated, he just stopped giving fucks and put on like 60lbs immediately, so we started calling him Fatty. This went on for years in an attempt to get him to do something and get off his lazy ass, but he never did so we just gave up and now he's just Eric again.
May 3 2013 9:24AM
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Stickity
Posts: 7750 - Karma: 769
damn you're good at reading
May 3 2013 9:25AM
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Culture+
Posts: 449 - Karma: 2,245
hey you fat fucking lard bucket of a human being go do some push ups or somthing
May 3 2013 9:29AM
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cubber
Posts: 1933 - Karma: 638
be gentle, begin the conversation as simple small talk, something you both can relate to, then wrap it around to what you're after, sort of like this "hey what's up donut? (i'm assuming everyone calls him donut) So how do you like these fancy new curtains? yes they are nice aren't they, they really get me in a relaxed state where I can put my guard down. Say, can you hand me that massage oil there and take off your shirt? perfect, thank you, now lay down on your back so I can massage you with my oily balls. Sure, I can jam them in your mouth for a minute." From there it should be pretty easy to obtain anal sex. Good luck
May 3 2013 9:36AM
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Dustin.
Posts: 13839 - Karma: 7,704
You just ignorantly described the internal struggle of an obese person... If it was so simple for them to motivate and push themselves, they wouldn't be fat in the first place.

The Biggest Loser is for show, but getting a high quality chef, personal trainer, and people to struggle through it with you for free (and have the chance to win money) is an opportunity you would have to be stupid to turn down.
May 3 2013 10:36AM
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.AR6rider.
Posts: 15976 - Karma: 8,799
I'd just say something along the lines of, "Hey man, I know you've been struggling with your weight and it sucks, but that show the Biggest Loser is coming into town and I think that if you're interested, it could be a great opportunity for you to get some professional training and get back into shape. Not to mention you can win a ton of money for doing it." Maybe you could show him pictures of past contestants on the show or something to give him an idea of what could happen. Odds are, he knows he's overweight, and it may suck to hear from a friend at first, but I think that anyone who truly wants to lose the weight would appreciate the concern and would definitely benefit from something like the Biggest Loser.

To all the kids hating on the show: why? Sure, they turn fitness and weight loss into sort of a game show and entertainment for people at home, but you can't deny that it really is awesome for the people on the show. They lose tons of weight, probably prevent additional heart disease, diabetes, etc, and (hopefully) get motivated to stay on the path they started on the show. I've seen the show a few times with my girlfriend and, while I think it's kind of lame to watch 45 minutes of people standing on scales, seeing the change in the contestants' attitudes and bodies is pretty amazing.
May 3 2013 11:15AM
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SwagasaurusRex
Posts: 635 - Karma: 333
You can tell him what he already knows, but he won't feel any drive and motivation unless he comes to the decision himself that he truely wants to do it.

Lets say he makes it on the program with your advice, and loses a ton of weight. Unless he is really determined he will unlikely keep all of the weight off.
May 3 2013 11:42AM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51263 - Karma: 157,455
If he's fat there's a slight chance he might no about it. It's not like one of those things that just creeps out of nowhere.

Go to bed one night nice and fit and wake up obese.
May 3 2013 11:44AM
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cornholio
Posts: 3952 - Karma: 3,057
maybe the cash prizes of the biggest loser would be motivation enough to get him to try out?  just tell him "dude ive been looking for ways to make quick money and started looking at game shows to enter.  i saw biggest loser is coming to town you can make bank if you win that shit.  you should enter it because you're fat enough and then give me some of your winnings."  that way it makes if more about taking your friend's money than calling him fat.
May 3 2013 12:10PM
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.Apex.
Posts: 2097 - Karma: 1,556
Get him on a see saw, and when he asks why you wanna go on a see saw just tell him you want to see the moon.
May 3 2013 12:51PM
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Dustin.
Posts: 13839 - Karma: 7,704
That just makes you sound like a selfish asshole.
May 3 2013 12:53PM
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PKNeison
Posts: 313 - Karma: 721
Tell him your concerned for his weight and should probably try out for Biggest Looser - also say that you'll support him the whole way through it!
May 3 2013 12:55PM
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Logey.
Posts: 2996 - Karma: 457
It's probably none of your business. I'm sure he's well aware. If he wants to lose weight, good for him , you can stay out of it and not be an asshole.
May 3 2013 12:59PM
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cornholio
Posts: 3952 - Karma: 3,057
maybe so, but it seems like a more lighthearted way to approach it than the serious "bro you're fat you need to lose weight and be healthy talk".  depending on how close a friend the guy is one might be more appropriate than the other
May 3 2013 1:01PM
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.AR6rider.
Posts: 15976 - Karma: 8,799
If a good friend of yours was slowly dying of cardiovascular disease and other complications of obesity, you'd just stand by idly because you're afraid of being an asshole? Sometimes not trying to help is more of an asshole move. Maybe all he needs is a bit of motivation and a push from a friend
May 3 2013 1:04PM
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Huck_Norris
Posts: 11487 - Karma: 18,627
Well that's kind of dramatic, no?

May 3 2013 1:12PM
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BrewskiJr
Posts: 5738 - Karma: 1,478
biggest loser is bullshit. They lose 150 pounds then regain it all back after the show when they have no one pushing them anymore and go back to their terrible eating habits.
May 3 2013 1:34PM
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sNaubi
Posts: 1633 - Karma: 2,357
that's where OP comes back in the picture and becomes his gymbuddy and keeps on pushing him.
May 5 2013 2:49PM
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johnnyBuz
Posts: 1438 - Karma: 1,270
"Hey bro, you're fucking fat."

I think that would do the trick?
May 5 2013 3:17PM
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SKI.ING
Posts: 2695 - Karma: 2,535
It's really not. Atherosclorosis and the fatty plaques they start with start building up at this age and only get worse over the decades. By late 40's, 50's, after all those asymptomatic years, he could be in a world of trouble in terms of cardiovascular disease, hypertension, diabetes, etc. And this is assuming he is moderately healthy now. If not it could all happen sooner.

I think this is a great idea OP. Basically, would you rather have your friend die prematurely or momentarily hurt his feelings.
May 5 2013 3:17PM
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Logey.
Posts: 2996 - Karma: 457
Obesity affects people in different ways. Not everyone with obesity has cardiovascular disease. Same thing with smokeing cigs, I personally hate it and the people that do it are slowly killing themselves but they are well aware of the consequences, so it's up to them if they want to do anything about it.
May 5 2013 4:09PM
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GayWolf420
Posts: 36696 - Karma: 110,690
Tell it to him like a man. Friend to Friend. And if he can't take it, that's his problem for being a pussy.
May 5 2013 4:11PM
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Drail
Posts: 14011 - Karma: 10,001
I'm confused. How would someone who is 150lbs overweight not know they are overweight? That's like saying "how do I break it to my blind friend that he can't see".
May 5 2013 4:31PM
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tgm
Posts: 278 - Karma: 325
be like hey man youre fat
May 5 2013 7:49PM
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Shewlur...
Posts: 5046 - Karma: 940
this is by far the most sincere post i have ever seen you write, but i agree completely

May 5 2013 9:06PM
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cbj
Posts: 2114 - Karma: 1,136
Whilst doing facial expressions of your icon
May 5 2013 9:19PM
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