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Funiest thing a stranger has said to you

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meth_time
Posts: 2783 - Karma: 21
(an old dude with a rainbow sweater and gray hair, at red mountain. A skiier in a wheelchair like thing with one ski on the bottom skis by, she looks like shes like 15 or somthing)

old guy: hey

me:hey

old guy: you see that chick ski by in the chair?

me: ya

old guy: thats one hot piece of ass

me: ya?

old guy: ya when she starts to go fast... im telling you, one hot piece of ass.

(at a rave, some guy walks up to me and my friend, i thought my friend knew him, he was like 20 somthing)

random guy: hey

us: hey

random guy: whats up?

me: not much

random guy: so whos going to be tapping a 19 year old tonight?

my friend: what?

random guy: there so messed up they wont even notice, trust me its cool.

random guy: trust me, your fucked, and your fucked, but they are more fucked.


(on a fairy boat)

my brother: (gets a napkin stuck in a waterbottle)
my brother: ohhh you got the napkin stuck in there
my brother again: thats what she said

some guy across the fairy: that is what she said


(halloween. after dropping off our passed out friend at another friends house, and walking down to panagos, carrying skis, boots, backpacks, and pillowcases filled with candy and liqour.
A caveman walks up to us with a box of pizza, and his girlfriend has dreads and kinda looks like amy whinehouse)

caveman: how do you get to the hound hotel?

us: i dont think there is a hound hotel

caveman: ya there is my friend told me to go there.
(hes standing infront of the hume hotel or somthing like that)

my friend: can i have some pizza?

caveman: no youve had enough
caveman: he needs some, skinnny bastard

(gives pizza to my skinny friend)

so we start walking away, and hes following us.

caveman: im not an aggressive person but im not afraid to be.

us: what?

caveman: your taking me to the hound hotel right?

then a bunch of chicks dressed as spartans walked by, he grabbed there swords and they beat him up.


anyone else?

Jan 12 2010 7:27PM
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carbon.pulse
Posts: 3348 - Karma: 22
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Jan 12 2010 7:36PM
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FerrisBueller
Posts: 8280 - Karma: 5,173
me: do you have change for a doller

stranger: only if you suck my dick

me: no thanks...lol
Jan 12 2010 7:42PM
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superpoluha
Posts: 1986 - Karma: 10
"the candy is in the back of the van over there"

and

"does taking big poops hurt ur butthole?"
Jan 12 2010 7:42PM
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Black-Bandanna
Posts: 6680 - Karma: 1,602
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Jan 12 2010 7:46PM
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meth_time
Posts: 2783 - Karma: 21
also some chick at a&w

a&w chick: how old are you guys

my friend: 13
me: 14
my other friend: old enough

a&w chick: maybe you guys shouldn't be smoking weed
then she asks for a smoke break.

my other friend: cigarettes are bad for you

a&w chick:you know what? suck my dick
Jan 12 2010 7:47PM
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purps
Posts: 468 - Karma: 30
not really a funny thing a stranger said to me but one time i was going to work (in a city) and i was paying for my parking. as i'm getting my ticket thing i hear some guy talking, assuming he was with somebody and talking to them. i look over and see a bum staring at me, and says "it's good to have a sense of humor". i was a little freaked out and thought he may have been drunk so i said yeah and got out of there
Jan 12 2010 7:47PM
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steezepleeze~
Posts: 103 - Karma: 22
one time this guy told a story about a fairy boat and i thought he was trippin because fairies dont need boats everyone knows fairies have wings making water travel unnecessary i thought it was kinda silly.
Jan 12 2010 7:54PM
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meth_time
Posts: 2783 - Karma: 21
*ferry boat
Jan 12 2010 7:56PM
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remove
Posts: 2566 - Karma: 1,026

stranger-"Your a tool!''

Me-"Alright."

Stranger-"WHAT!?!?!?"

Me-"Alright."

Stranger-"YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!"

skiing.... strange people

Jan 12 2010 7:59PM
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Elijah.
Posts: 9322 - Karma: 76
"You smell so good."
In the listening lounge of the radio station I work at. It was slightly weird.
Jan 12 2010 8:03PM
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UNREAL
Posts: 3989 - Karma: 23
this happened to some friends of mine:
there sitting at coffee time at like 3 am ripped out of their minds, and this really tall guy in all black, wearing a trenchcoat and with really long hair and sunglasses walks up and asks if they want to see some magic. nobody answers him so he pulls out a deck of cards and starts doing "tricks". So my friend was like dude i know how to do all these and so the guy just stares at him for like 5 solid minutes, then goes back to doing his tricks. Eventually he whispers to them that his name is "mysterio" and leaves.

Jan 12 2010 8:04PM
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gregorio
Posts: 2372 - Karma: 151
i was walking around the boston common and an old homeless guy with many missing teeth asks me "where the hitmen?! i know they're coming for me! where are they??"
Jan 12 2010 8:05PM
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ROOS.
Posts: 1992 - Karma: 39
thats hilarious
Jan 12 2010 8:08PM
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BravoWhiskey5280
Posts: 4020 - Karma: 520
How do you get to chads gap from the bottom of alta/ lol
Jan 12 2010 8:09PM
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Hoover
Posts: 1432 - Karma: 52


<span id="pyzam-funnypic-start" style="display:none"></span>
<p><a href="http://www.pyzam.com/funnypictures/details/3656"><img src="http://stuff.pyzam.com/funnypics/misc/free_candy_van.jpg" alt="Free Candy funny picture" title="Free Candy funny picture" border="0" /></a><br/>Do you have a new <a href="http://www.pyzam.com/myspace2layouts">MySpace 2.0 Layout</a> yet?</p><img style="visibility:hidden;width:0px;height:0px;" border=0 width=0 height=0 src="http://stuff.pyzam.com/misc/CXNID=1000015.69NXC.gif" />
<span id="pyzam-funnypic-end" style="display:none"></span>

sry i fail at embedding

Jan 12 2010 8:13PM
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Hoover
Posts: 1432 - Karma: 52
[img]<span id="pyzam-funnypic-start" style="display:none"></span>
<p><a href="http://www.pyzam.com/funnypictures/details/3656"><img src="http://stuff.pyzam.com/funnypics/misc/free_candy_van.jpg" alt="Free Candy funny picture" title="Free Candy funny picture" border="0" /></a><br/>Do you have a new <a href="http://www.pyzam.com/myspace2layouts">MySpace 2.0 Layout</a> yet?</p><img style="visibility:hidden;width:0px;height:0px;" border=0 width=0 height=0 src="http://stuff.pyzam.com/misc/CXNID=1000015.69NXC.gif" />
<span id="pyzam-funnypic-end" style="display:none"></span>[/img]
Jan 12 2010 8:17PM
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_CC_
Posts: 3890 - Karma: 747
'you have nice feet'
Jan 12 2010 8:17PM
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Hoover
Posts: 1432 - Karma: 52

wow im gonna kill myself

Jan 12 2010 8:18PM
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Hoover
Posts: 1432 - Karma: 52

[img]<span id="pyzam-funnypic-start" style="display:none"></span>
<p><a href="http://www.pyzam.com/funnypictures/details/3656"><img src="http://stuff.pyzam.com/funnypics/misc/free_candy_van.jpg" alt="Free Candy funny picture" title="Free Candy funny picture" border="0" /></a><br/>Do you have a new <a href="http://www.pyzam.com/myspace2layouts">MySpace 2.0 Layout</a> yet?</p><img style="visibility:hidden;width:0px;height:0px;" border=0 width=0 height=0 src="http://stuff.pyzam.com/misc/CXNID=1000015.69NXC.gif" />
<span id="pyzam-funnypic-end" style="display:none"></span>[/img]

Jan 12 2010 8:20PM
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Hoover
Posts: 1432 - Karma: 52
OMG im even lookin at the embeding for n000bzzz and i still cant get it,please help +k
Jan 12 2010 8:21PM
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theblacktaco
Posts: 1462 - Karma: 82
work !
Jan 12 2010 8:23PM
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meth_time
Posts: 2783 - Karma: 21
turn off the fancy gui editor in your settings.
Jan 12 2010 8:25PM
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scratchproteen
Posts: 5173 - Karma: 286
quite possibly the biggest embed fail of all time?
Jan 12 2010 8:28PM
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statutory_APE
Posts: 100 - Karma: 14
Paging the abortionator.....
Jan 12 2010 8:38PM
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T-Holt
Posts: 5020 - Karma: 639
Here's how:[IMG] http://stuff.pyzam.com/funnypics/misc/free_candy_van.jpg [/IMG]

Take out the spaces.


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Jan 12 2010 8:40PM
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ButteredToast.
Posts: 6459 - Karma: 2,570
Me and my cousin were out getting Monsters at 3AM for illegal reasons, and we're standing at the big glass fridge at the store and there's this creepy like 80 year old guy in a trench coat and a cowboy hat type thing next to us. Its kind of a creepy night, storming and such.

(as my cousin reaches for the M-80 monster or whatever it is)

Old Guy (with his back turned to us): KHAOS is better.

My cousin: What?

Old Guy (turns and makes sinister eye contact): Son, you heard me. KHAOS is better.

Cousin: Uhm... thank you sir.

Old Guy: Trust me. *wink*



Yeah, we both got KHAOS.
Jan 12 2010 8:58PM
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Hoover
Posts: 1432 - Karma: 52
thank you
Jan 12 2010 9:00PM
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poh_money
Posts: 609 - Karma: 66

this happened yesterday,

my two friends and i got retarded high. we thus went to burger king with no visine or febreeze/axe to feed our growling stomaches. as i follow my friend in, this guy in his mid 20's looks at me and goes, "you guys are so stoned right now!" i fell to the floor laughing and he goes back to his table with his girlfriend and mother. it was a hilarious scenario.

Jan 12 2010 9:11PM
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jimmer
Posts: 3586 - Karma: 80
at the el dorado casino in reno, nv. 2 friends and i are walking inside the casino.
a short little tweaker, from far away says "hey can i ask you guys a question?"

so we say yeah and stop. he walks towards us, looks at us, and walks away. i say "was that it?" he replies, "uhhhh no! hey come talk to me in the bathroom." so we were like "no way man we'll talk right here."

he comes over to us.

tweak - "so you guys havin a good time tonight? like partyin and stuff?"
me - "yeah sure man, best night of my life." (sarcastically)
tweak - "oh cool cool. hey so uhh...you guys smoke cigarettes?"
me - "haha no man, cigs are gross."
tweak - "oh cool that's cool." then he notices my camera. "so are you guys like freelance photographers, or independent filmmakers or something?"
me - "no man i'm steven spielberg"
tweak - "HAHA oh man you got me! fuckin good one man you got me!"

we walk away and he quickly approaches a group of 3 black girls. he reminded me of this guy from superbad:

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Jan 12 2010 9:13PM
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Backyard.Skier
Posts: 5397 - Karma: 1,497
in a dark pathway:
"Where you going"
then i booked it
Jan 12 2010 9:19PM
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OMGWTFBBQ
Posts: 954 - Karma: 208
nice dick
Jan 12 2010 9:21PM
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beezey
Posts: 9027 - Karma: 428
I was skiing on a cat track and a crazy man in florescent colored jacket just screamed in happiness and scared the shit out of me, I almost fell over. He felt sad, at least he looked sad as he began to ski away using only one leg lifting the other to the side, it was an impressive feet for a 60+ year old man
Jan 12 2010 9:22PM
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Relish_man
Posts: 5386 - Karma: 551
hahahathis is a little story that must have been kinda awkward from the strangers point of view
In Montreal, after a little jazz concert i went to with my family and my grand-parents. were walking down the sidewalk with my grand-father in front. hes pretty old and has alzheimers and parkinsons and other shit so he doesnt always make sense but this couple was walking towards us and just as they approach my grand-father, he yells : ''We dont have any money, go away!'' and he just kept walking. me and my brother started laughing but poor couple, must have been kinda weird.
Jan 12 2010 9:25PM
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AcidKing
Posts: 284 - Karma: 10
How do you know a hippies gotten action? His finger nails are clean.
Jan 12 2010 9:26PM
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ECfreeski3
Posts: 12019 - Karma: 125
hahaha
Jan 12 2010 11:03PM
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.AR6rider.
Posts: 15976 - Karma: 8,799

A little background:  my roommates are from Jackson, MI.  There's a prison there.  Not much to know.

So I'm tailgating earlier this year with  my roommates and some other friends when a homeless guy walks up looking for cans.  He starts talking to us, asking where we're from and stuff and it went kinda like this....

Homeless guy: So where you guys from?

Roommates: Jackson

Homeless guy:  Oh, really?  I lived in Jackson for ten years.

Roommates: Cool

Homeless guy: Yeah.  I killed the n****r that raped my daughter.

All of us:  What the FUCK

He then proceeded to walk across the street, piss in our neighbor's front yard, and casually walk down the street.

Jan 12 2010 11:31PM
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pomme-de-terre
Posts: 3915 - Karma: 703
IM GONNA FUCK YOU!
Jan 12 2010 11:42PM
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fosnow333
Posts: 120 - Karma: 13
in a boston subway station on a trip with my debate team and i reach into my bag to grab gum and my phone and this scary, huge-ass black guy walks by at the same time im pulling at my purse and he screams at me, "You think imma fucking mug you cause i'm black???? imma pull a knife on you!!!!!!!" i actually was scared shitless and thought i was going to die.  (not that i have any problem with black ppl. this dude was just fucking huggeeeeeee)
Jan 13 2010 12:09AM
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meth_time
Posts: 2783 - Karma: 21
Hahahahahaa
Jan 13 2010 12:10AM
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ECfreeski3
Posts: 12019 - Karma: 125
hahaha
Jan 13 2010 12:13AM
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MCIRONCOCK
Posts: 3094 - Karma: 30
Me and my friend were on the lift with one other dude, in his thirties or so. We were acting a bit ridiculous, trying to make the guy feel uncomfortable. We ended up playing the penis game with this dude completely silent. He then told us a story about how when he and his wife first moved in together, she was being all serious trying to set up an answering machine message, and he just starts screaming penis in the middle of her sentence. One of the most awesome people i've ever met on the hill haha.
Jan 13 2010 12:22AM
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freezed
Posts: 12973 - Karma: 500
I was walking to the bus downtown and someone across the street on the other sidewalk yelled "Hey you! You! Does your girlfriend make you wear that hat WHEN YOU HAVE SEX??!!"

I was wearing an (extremely normal) green beanie. I don't understand.
Jan 13 2010 12:45AM
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.jr
Posts: 5313 - Karma: 356
condom.
Jan 13 2010 12:58AM
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ECfreeski3
Posts: 12019 - Karma: 125
holy shit did you just crack the case for this guy??
Jan 13 2010 12:59AM
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OnePlank
Posts: 1212 - Karma: 60
i'm standing at the corner of a street, and a random guy who's been standing there for a little says "if you like it when you take a dump because it feels good, does that mean your gay?" wooaaahhh there
Jan 13 2010 1:06AM
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freezed
Posts: 12973 - Karma: 500
hmm. possibly so. i don't know what would motivate someone to yell that at a stranger though.
Jan 13 2010 1:16AM
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Nicholas.
Posts: 10905 - Karma: 60
me and two buddies in an elevator. 24ish year old couple. we hop in and they were OBVIOUSLY just making out. dead silent and obviously awkward and the dude just goes "HEY HUNNY REMEMBER THAT ONE TIME WHEN I STUCK MY WHOLE HAND IN YOUR VAGINA!!!" then just got off.
Jan 13 2010 1:16AM
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ECfreeski3
Posts: 12019 - Karma: 125
haha elevator scenes are the best
Jan 13 2010 1:23AM
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dodgeridge*rider
Posts: 1359 - Karma: 25
at an oakland A's game

me- can i have garlic fries and a water cup

asian consession stand lady- a water cup or a waaater cup(winks)

me- how about the second one

lady fills a cup up with sprite and doesnt charge me

lady- my boss is an asshole and i love losing company money

me- well thank you so much

lady- hell yeah come back soon!!


i came bacck three times and she refilled it
Jan 13 2010 1:36AM
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