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March, 2024

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My parents took away my zippo

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Sufferboy
Posts: 4241 - Karma: 122
ok so earlier today my bath room smelled terrible because i have a litter box in there and shit and i was lighting incenses to get the smell out, i accidently burned a towel while doing this(i know retarded thing to do) and i stoped the fire b4 ne thing happened, next thing i kno my rents come in and are like are u a pot head where is ur bowl give us ur lighter(im edge so i started laughing when they asked me about pot) so so i give them my lighter and they search for a bowl and pot but dont find ne because im edge. 

so now im kind of freaking out because i am addicted to burning shit and  i need to know how to calm my rents down
Jul 8 2008 8:45PM
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comeatmebro
Posts: 10720 - Karma: 66
tell them to drug test you. if you pass, you get your lighter back and they quit being bitches. if you fail, well idk let them decide an insane punishment since you'll pass it.
Jul 8 2008 8:46PM
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finssidedown
Posts: 509 - Karma: 10
hah that's one of those ridiculous stories you can't make up.

Agreed.  Offer to get drug tested like right away so there can't be any question about you flushing it out.

About burning stuff though.  You should really do it outside your house.


Jul 8 2008 8:50PM
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Beef.Supreme
Posts: 103 - Karma: 16
Tell your parents to get real. Burning towels don't smell anything like reefers.

To get your lighter back, you should tell them that the ability to harness fire is one of the fundamental accomplishments of mankind that sets us aside from other organisms... it can be imperative to survival if you find yourself in a tight situation. Same thing goes for knives: if anybody ever questions you just be like "oh shit this is for everything between buttering bread to severing my leg in order to survive when a boulder pins me down and nobody is around to help."
Jul 8 2008 8:52PM
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Sufferboy
Posts: 4241 - Karma: 122
i told them the drug test thing but they are like no u will find some way to cover it up

then i called them crack heads

now im grounded
Jul 8 2008 8:55PM
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inactive
Posts: 4772 - Karma: 97
you parents sound silly
Jul 8 2008 8:57PM
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finssidedown
Posts: 509 - Karma: 10
In hindsight I bet this was a bad call.
Jul 8 2008 8:58PM
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inactive
Posts: 4772 - Karma: 97
if they are so convinced, maybe you should just give up, start smoking, so you and you parents are on the same level
Jul 8 2008 9:01PM
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doublexl
Posts: 8407 - Karma: 26
dude your parents suck. a while ago my parents realized that i was going to do whatever i wanted and stopped caring so much.
Jul 8 2008 9:02PM
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MCIRONCOCK
Posts: 3094 - Karma: 30
Maybe they took it so they could smoke their own pot, and accused you of being a pot head to make it look like they're against the reefer
Jul 8 2008 9:03PM
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inactive
Posts: 4772 - Karma: 97
definately
Jul 8 2008 9:04PM
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comeatmebro
Posts: 10720 - Karma: 66
yeah, this is now you're only hope. no joke either, why not?
Jul 8 2008 9:04PM
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Sufferboy
Posts: 4241 - Karma: 122
because i am not going to go against my own beliefs to have them call the cops on me
Jul 8 2008 9:05PM
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ben802
Posts: 565 - Karma: 16
sounds like they took away your lighter cause you almost burned the house down...so you shouldnt get a lightter
Jul 8 2008 9:07PM
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Sufferboy
Posts: 4241 - Karma: 122
hahahaha dude i stoped the fire in an instance

and my dad has almost burnt dow the house plenty of times
Jul 8 2008 9:08PM
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comeatmebro
Posts: 10720 - Karma: 66
well then you're fucked basically.
Jul 8 2008 9:09PM
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Sufferboy
Posts: 4241 - Karma: 122
i guess ill just go buy a new one
Jul 8 2008 9:10PM
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MCIRONCOCK
Posts: 3094 - Karma: 30
Get a big plastic bag and put a bunch of shredded grass and oregano in it and toss it on their bed, then call your parents out on it
Jul 8 2008 9:14PM
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Inbred_Redneck
Posts: 2776 - Karma: 28
There's another solution....

You can always run away and become a bum.
Jul 8 2008 9:19PM
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Sufferboy
Posts: 4241 - Karma: 122
hahaha the pic of my life
Jul 8 2008 9:20PM
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Balto
Posts: 25985 - Karma: 4,398
ya just buy a new one. they are only like 12 for a small one
Jul 8 2008 9:23PM
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freestyler540
Posts: 13046 - Karma: 18,292
Click for larger image
Jul 8 2008 9:31PM
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brenker
Posts: 3188 - Karma: 71
or since you just like lighting things on fire you could save 11 dollars and buy a $1 lighter
Jul 8 2008 9:34PM
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C+Thompson
Posts: 434 - Karma: 97
12 for a small lighter?  I'm probably misunderstanding something here, but that's alot. I've seen them for like 1.50  But I don't but them, I'm underage, so i have to resolve to stealing.
Jul 8 2008 9:36PM
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C+Thompson
Posts: 434 - Karma: 97
Shit, I forgot it was a zippo, I thought you were talking about a regular lighter..  sorry.
Jul 8 2008 9:40PM
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Silence
Posts: 16030 - Karma: 149
Whats so good about a zippo?

It's metal and it makes a click noise..

Sure windproof and shit but it's an expensive way to make fire, considering you don't even smoke.
Jul 8 2008 9:51PM
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Manlenium
Posts: 571 - Karma: 11
At least you didnt burn down the house.
Jul 8 2008 9:59PM
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afton_steeze
Posts: 1765 - Karma: 92
drug test.
and try febreze in the meantime. works like a charm.
Jul 8 2008 10:14PM
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Commonwealth
Posts: 3729 - Karma: 11
why do you have a zippo if you dont smoke?
on second thought, why even buy a zippo at all?
Jul 8 2008 10:38PM
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Sufferboy
Posts: 4241 - Karma: 122
it was my real dads b4 he died
Jul 8 2008 10:39PM
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Commonwealth
Posts: 3729 - Karma: 11

welp, ill be the first to say it:

PWNED!

and sorry about your dad

Jul 8 2008 10:41PM
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Albrecht.
Posts: 1535 - Karma: 11
seems like a major story detail you left out.  they should definatley give you it back.
Jul 8 2008 10:48PM
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Liam.Butler
Posts: 709 - Karma: 17
Tell your parents to stfu and give it back. I don't know any one who smokes pot out of a bowl with a zippo it just taste terrible. Its amazing how parents will make shit up so they can power trip. I mean lighting the fire was stupid and you should loose the zippo for that, but then blindly accusing you of smoking weed. Put acid in there coffee only suitable revenge.
Jul 8 2008 11:18PM
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ben802
Posts: 565 - Karma: 16
ozium is the realest shit....
Jul 8 2008 11:37PM
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Billek
Posts: 5665 - Karma: 98
I have never tried, but I heard you cant smoke weed out of a bowl with a zippo because it is really bad for you.  They could take the "You can light joints" route, but adding the other statement could help.
Jul 8 2008 11:44PM
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MCIRONCOCK
Posts: 3094 - Karma: 30

Sounds like something only someone who smokes weed would know

Jul 9 2008 12:07AM
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Franny
Posts: 3980 - Karma: 77
I can try starting a fire with only sticks. More rewarding.
Jul 9 2008 12:21AM
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maclem
Posts: 2497 - Karma: 17
well your mom should know that you dont use zippos to light your bowl, its just common knowledge.
Jul 9 2008 1:01AM
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Sufferboy
Posts: 4241 - Karma: 122
not if ur a Jebus lover like her and is always pissed that i wear tall tees and ripped jeans
Jul 9 2008 1:02AM
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breckfreeskier
Posts: 1541 - Karma: 22
I would be pissed if my jeans were ripped
Jul 9 2008 1:10AM
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Sufferboy
Posts: 4241 - Karma: 122
y?

its not like i bought them that way

they just ended up being like that after being thrashed on for years
Jul 9 2008 1:23AM
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steve.o
Posts: 628 - Karma: 9
dang life sucks
Jul 9 2008 1:37AM
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ChronicLines
Posts: 951 - Karma: 61
So you're edge and addicted to burning things?  So awesome.
Jul 9 2008 2:26AM
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ThaLetterM.
Posts: 8609 - Karma: 1,612
it doesnt fit and tastes like a butthole..so ive heard...
Jul 9 2008 2:32AM
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sdfjklioeur
Posts: 2082 - Karma: 114
hahaha, edge....

better rub some sticks and go caveman on that
Jul 9 2008 4:44AM
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freeze_pooter
Posts: 3296 - Karma: 16
i hate when parents just  dont understand what it means to be edge...
Jul 9 2008 5:01AM
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tommihq
Posts: 905 - Karma: 11
How are you sipposed to cover up drugs in a test?

Maybe you should burn your parents
Jul 9 2008 8:31AM
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JHDski47
Posts: 596 - Karma: 26
i can make a fire with sticks (claim)
Jul 9 2008 8:42AM
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Static
Posts: 8494 - Karma: 4,068
haha straight edge haha
Jul 9 2008 9:05AM
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JzD.
Posts: 1615 - Karma: 153
Hey we're kids, we live in the moment.
Dec 2 2011 10:19PM
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smooter
Posts: 1121 - Karma: 1,365
why do you need a zippo that bad if you dont smoke...?
Dec 2 2011 10:32PM
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