Welcome to suburbia. Aka, my home for the last 15 years. Though I've only been under the influence of the popped collar once or twice, (I was vaccinated soon thereafter) I still find myself facing the daily grind that is central new york. Now I'm not saying it's closed to a CNY epidemic, but it's moreso that I've realized that my neighbors have highclass sticks shoved up their asses.

This is why.

Within the past few weeks, my neighborhood has been reached it's highest level of paranoia..ever. This has all aroused because a handfull of houses have had large quantities of beer stolen from their garages. They have been reacting like this teenage sport is new and unheard of, though it's been around forever.

I kind of can see where they're coming from, I mean, if i had my whole fridge cleared out (one story), I'd be pretty pissed too. Who the hell wants their beer stolen?!

Yet their retaliation is pitiful. Instead of alerting the media or police (a common practice for the stepford wives and their husbands) they took it upon themselves to place 3 signs up at each of the various entrances of our development. Each sign has two sides. They said things like "Neighborhood Watch In Effect" "Neighborhood Watch Currently In Progress" etc etc.

Driving my best friend home after a lame bonfire/field party, we were wayy too tempted to vandalize the very signs that were meant to taunt and scared our very kind- teenagers.

I really doubt that they thought two blonde girls who are leaving for college in less than a week would be the perps.

Enjoy Ns.