The other day I checked my mailbox to find a ski magazine. Becoming excited, I picked up the magazine only to feel like I had been tricked into bed by a pre-op tranny. It was a Freeskier magazine- the Cosmo of ski magazines.

Even though Freeskier wreaks of the fresh anal poundage provided by Colorado's dick, I had to look through it. About halfway through, I couldn't take it anymore. The trick of inserting broken glass under my toe nails wasn't enough to take my mind off the pain of reading Freeskier's "articles" and "interviews". Instead of continuing to treat myself as a Guantanamo prisoner, I grabbed the 2011 Powder Buyer's Guide and decided to compare the two on how much original skiing content they contain, both ski porn and articles/interviews.

Before I began I thought there's no way Freeskier could lose based on the fact that it was the Photo Annual Edition, arguably the best issue for ski porn, an easy battle against Powder's Buyer's Guide... until I compared the numbers.

2011 Freeskier Photo Annual VS. 2011 Powder Buyer's Guide

Total Pages:

Powder- 155

Freeskier 123

Pages not including Advertisements:

Powder- 107

Freeskier- 59

Percentage of Magazine that's Advertisements:

Powder- 31%

Freeskier- 52%

Pages until table of contents (first page of original content):

Powder- 7

Freeskier- 11

Pages of written material- articles/interviews (approx.):

Powder- 15.0

Freeskier- 6.75

Pages of interesting written material about the ski culture:

Powder- 8.0

Freeskier- 0.5

Pages of written material relating to how well the contributing writers can blow Jossi and Byron Wells:

Freeskier- 2.25

Powder- 0.0

Pages that show the act of skiing, including ads:

Powder- 37

Freeskier- 65

Pages that show the act of skiing, excluding ads:

Powder- 23

Freeskier- 34

Percentage of Ski Porn thats Original Content:

Powder- 62%

Freeskier- 52%

Not bad for Powders buyers guide with 50 pages of just gear that have no pictures of skiing and no articles or interviews. Unless Freeskier plans to survive on the ignorance of weekend warriors and kids that don't know how to read, they should start producing a real ski magazine and not one sculpted out of herpes shavings.