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abjectwoe
May, 2025

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Most Trouble You’ve Got Into at Work/School

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STEEZUS_CHRI5T
Posts: 3024 - Karma: 23,312
Probably when I accidentally set the fire alarms off at a private golf course I worked at. I was 15, should never have fessed up to it because it was a mistake and they never would have figured it out.
2 years ago
11 0
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dognutsdogfart
Posts: 2624 - Karma: 35,066
not me but this kid i worked with at a really expensive horse jumping place hit the owners custom raptor with a golf cart in the first 2 hours of his first day. and then the next day he drove the golf cart into a post. didnt see him after that weirdly
2 years ago
22 0
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GrapeHunter
Posts: 2406 - Karma: 8,779
when i worked in a cart barn in highschool i was whipping the carts inside and i would drift them into the parked position and accidentally missed my slide and ran into the charger cable that was hanging down from the ceiling and ripped it. my pros were not happy with me and let me know that it would be very expensive to fix and then i need to pay more attention. i then proceeded to microwave old hotdogs in the cart barn microwave until they would explode
2 years ago
20 0
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Gourd
Posts: 468 - Karma: 5,052
Once I dropped almost $200 worth of chicken on the ground. My boss just laughed and called me a dumbass. Somehow he cared less than I did
2 years ago
10 0
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theabortionator
Posts: 52609 - Karma: 174,433
Threw a bunch of stupid cards from people off the balcony at church. Prayer things I think. Couldn't watch power rangers for 2 weeks. It was fucking bullshit.

Even though I served my time it still haunts me. Also probably had a better chance of Jesus answering people's prayers fluttering in the air.
2 years ago
12 1
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r00kie
Posts: 5238 - Karma: 59,602
4th grade. I had beef with this kid so drilled in the head with a football. About a 15 yard bullet across the playground, never saw it coming. Probably the best ball I've ever thrown and totally worth the week of recess detention.
2 years ago
23 0
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SchizoSkier
Posts: 2877 - Karma: 31,257
in first grade I climbed the chain link fence during recess then just ran away cause I wanted to go to mcdonalds and the cops came and find me ☠️ funny part is I had no idea how to get to McDonald’s and had no money
2 years ago
27 0
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GayWolf420
Posts: 38080 - Karma: 129,568
Called my VP during senior year a bitch because well.....she was being one. Totally ruined an epic banter sesh with the lads at lunch.
2 years ago
12 0
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iH8pow
Posts: 1886 - Karma: 8,487
I got expelled in 7th grade
2 years ago
0 4
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STEEZUS_CHRI5T
Posts: 3024 - Karma: 23,312
iH8powI got expelled in 7th grade

Gotta hide your reefer and 40 better
2 years ago
11 0
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weastcoat
Posts: 6504 - Karma: 75,411
GrapeHunterwhen i worked in a cart barn in highschool i was whipping the carts inside and i would drift them into the parked position and accidentally missed my slide and ran into the charger cable that was hanging down from the ceiling and ripped it. my pros were not happy with me and let me know that it would be very expensive to fix and then i need to pay more attention. i then proceeded to microwave old hotdogs in the cart barn microwave until they would explode


Lord are golf course jobs fun as hell.
2 years ago
7 0
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GayWolf420
Posts: 38080 - Karma: 129,568
weatcoastLord are golf course jobs fun as hell.

I kinda miss getting rediculously baked at 5am and mowing fairways or triplexing approaches. So much fun.
2 years ago
11 0
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Chunderface
Posts: 2564 - Karma: 10,040
In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max's toupee and I glued it on my face when I play Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog... and then, my mom sent me to the... to the summer camp for fat kids... and then they served lunch I got nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out!

But, the worst thing I ever done, I mixed up all this fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, t-t-then, I made a noise like this.

[imitating vomiting four times]

And then, I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. And I never felt so bad in my entire life!
2 years ago
24 0
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ChadThundercock
Posts: 3071 - Karma: 835
This was a big mistake in my career

https://www.twincities.com/2017/03/03/minnesota-postman-charged-with-bestiality-of-dog-on-route/

I was working a mail route and one thing got to another and yea... this happened.
2 years ago
12 6
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Icant_kfed
Posts: 1279 - Karma: 11,596
Wailed some kid in the head with a transformers lunch box
2 years ago
11 0
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Rparr
Posts: 5752 - Karma: 49,094
ChadThundercockThis was a big mistake in my career

https://www.twincities.com/2017/03/03/minnesota-postman-charged-with-bestiality-of-dog-on-route/

I was working a mail route and one thing got to another and yea... this happened.


don't worry brother it happens to the best of us
2 years ago
2 3
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Thegenericskier
Posts: 2921 - Karma: 34,429
GrapeHunterwhen i worked in a cart barn in highschool i was whipping the carts inside and i would drift them into the parked position and accidentally missed my slide and ran into the charger cable that was hanging down from the ceiling and ripped it. my pros were not happy with me and let me know that it would be very expensive to fix and then i need to pay more attention. i then proceeded to microwave old hotdogs in the cart barn microwave until they would explode


I have done this exact same thing a few summers ago, also filled a trash can up with water and drove into. on rainy days we'd take a golf cart into the mud and go mudding with em and may have gotten one stuck
2 years ago
4 0
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Pablo_Sanchez
Posts: 700 - Karma: 5,572
I don’t feel like typing out a whole story but it was such bs when a fire alarm went off in our dorm during the middle of the day Saturday when everyone’s out and about and basically our whole floor was written up/fined/arrested/or expelled for any bud EMS happened to see while they cleared the building. Like they’re looking for people or a fire and couldn’t have turned a blind eye to some of other stuff they saw??

**This post was edited on Dec 19th 2022 at 4:10:04pm
2 years ago
3 0
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profa_212
Posts: 9202 - Karma: 40,270
AbarskiI don’t feel like typing out a whole story but it was such bs when a fire alarm went off in our dorm during the middle of the day Saturday when everyone’s out and about and basically our whole floor was written up/fined/arrested/or expelled for any bud EMS happened to see while they cleared the building. Like they’re looking for people or a fire and couldn’t have turned a blind eye to some of other stuff they saw??

**This post was edited on Dec 19th 2022 at 4:10:04pm


That was a drug search. The plan the whole time was to find drugs.
2 years ago
16 0
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Pablo_Sanchez
Posts: 700 - Karma: 5,572
Profahoben_212That was a drug search. The plan the whole time was to find drugs.


No some idiot who didn’t live there started a grease fire, but it probably was an opportunistic drug search so yeah you’re probably right
2 years ago
6 0
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Casey
Posts: 8017 - Karma: 26,915
This is probably not the most serious story but it’s kind of funny in hindsight. I was working at a sales associate in the ski department and a tech in the ski section of a big box sporting goods store. Job was terrible everyone treated the staff like shit. Anyway there was a month of ‘inventory’ where they mandated night shifts and we’d go around scanning like literally everything in the store and warehouse. The security alarm couldn’t be disabled so once we started at 10pm they wouldn’t let us outside until our shift was over so we had to bring food ahead of time. Well one day I was late and forgot and so did my buddy so we’re just hungry AF at our lunch break feeling sorry for ourselves. One of our coworkers were like oh dude help yourself to a couple burritos in the fridge I bought a ton of extras no worries hit me back later. So we did. Next thing I know people are coming up to me and him like later or the next day being like dude did you eat Nicks lunch he is super pissed off about it why the fuck would you do that? And we’re like umm what. So a few days later I’m in the managers office getting written up and they are threatening to fire me for theft. 🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️
2 years ago
11 0
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GrandThings
Posts: 3299 - Karma: 34,060
Sophomore year of high school my friend dared me to crush up a Smartie and snort it in the middle of English class. I was like a "good student" or whatever and hadn't really been in trouble, so my teacher called my parents directly because she was worried about me rather than get me in actual trouble. I don't think my parents have ever been as mad at me. Kinda funny too because I hadn't done any drugs or alcohol at that point and was just being a shithead teenage boy.
2 years ago
10 0
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connecticunt
Posts: 847 - Karma: 1,541
I snuck out and went into the city to go to a rave on a school night in hs, ended up being given ecstasy. The next day I went in looking like a train wreck and I was pouring sweat so they sent me to the nurse. I thought there would be some sort of patient confidentiality so I told her what happened the night before and I was sentenced to substance abuse therapy for the rest of high school.
2 years ago
27 0
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BigPurpleSkiSuit
Posts: 9616 - Karma: 71,531
long story short, was taught a faulty procedure as a bank teller that led to us shredding about 8k in cash from a local business deposit.
2 years ago
8 0
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piss.boy
Posts: 1491 - Karma: 10,621
in elementary recess I threw a football sized snow chunk up a few feet in the air. No one was around me but the supervisor saw and freaked out saying I could've killed somebody. Also the same lady took my megaphone once. L.
2 years ago
5 0
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Chunderface
Posts: 2564 - Karma: 10,040
connecticuntI snuck out and went into the city to go to a rave on a school night in hs, ended up being given ecstasy. The next day I went in looking like a train wreck and I was pouring sweat so they sent me to the nurse. I thought there would be some sort of patient confidentiality so I told her what happened the night before and I was sentenced to substance abuse therapy for the rest of high school.


That is so fuuuuucked. What do you mean "ended up being given"? Like someone slippped it on you?
2 years ago
1 0
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HypeBeast
Posts: 10063 - Karma: 76,223
I got detention once.
2 years ago
1 0
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C.R.E.A.M
Posts: 3002 - Karma: 4,702
One time I wired $28,000 to the wrong vendor. That was a solid day.
2 years ago
12 0
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X_MEMESWERVE_XX
Posts: 3945 - Karma: 33,347
Me and a friend started a twitter page in like 2016 doing “roast polls” for our school. Shit got mad out of hand. Page blew up to 1000 followers in a day and by 2pm I was in the principals office apologizing profusely and ended up getting off clean cuz he watched me wipe the account and deactivate it.


didn’t stop fucking around on the internet tho. Later that year I made a fake twitter account for our school district and tried to cancel school cuz we were supposed to have a pow day and I wanted to ski. Page blew up again, Misspelled a word like an idiot and people were sus and didn’t believe it. I wiped the account and deactivated and didn’t get in trouble for that one


in the end I learned my lesson and am a better person and don’t fuck around on the internet anymore… except for this site

**This post was edited on Dec 24th 2022 at 2:50:47pm
2 years ago
16 1
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X_MEMESWERVE_XX
Posts: 3945 - Karma: 33,347
Got kicked out of soccer league when I was 5 years old for pulling down my pants mid game and streaking down the field. I fuckin hated soccer and my dad played college so he wanted that dream for me. Respectable but ball sports were never my thing
2 years ago
10 0
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X_MEMESWERVE_XX
Posts: 3945 - Karma: 33,347
In my highschool varsity Nordic ski days we always rented out the same cabin for the entire team on state meet weekend. One year we had a new freshman on the team and we made a horrible concoction of Gatorade mix/milk/raw egg/herbs and spices/other nasty shit I don’t remember and made him drink it, coach wasn’t mad at first until she found out about us jumping off the cabin roof into a snow bank-we almost got pulled from the race but then we wouldn’t have had a team for the boys
2 years ago
5 0
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cyphers
Posts: 1843 - Karma: 21,198
weatcoastLord are golf course jobs fun as hell.


caddy shack is a documentary
2 years ago
9 0
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Brule.
Posts: 3988 - Karma: 6,710
Got caught taking dabs in the dorms back when I was in college. Got off with a UPM ticket at the time but it could’ve been WAY worse.
2 years ago
3 0
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BingPow
Posts: 579 - Karma: 5,672
Brule.Got caught taking dabs in the dorms back when I was in college. Got off with a UPM ticket at the time but it could’ve been WAY worse.


my college experience is def way more chill with the weed in dorms, but how u get caught smoking dabs?
2 years ago
1 0
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Brule.
Posts: 3988 - Karma: 6,710
BingPowmy college experience is def way more chill with the weed in dorms, but how u get caught smoking dabs?


Long story short I was being an idiot setting off bottle rockets on the edge of campus with some friends. Went back to my dorm, took some dabs, and when university police knocked on my door my rig was in plain sight; dumb move I know. I wasn’t smoking weed at the time bc I was under the false impression that I was getting drug tested for my summer job. My roommate had a decent amount of wax and is from South Korea, so I took the blame to make sure he didn’t get deported.


Ticket didn’t cost a thing other than 7 hours of community service and 6 months with an ACOD. Then weed and concentrates became legalized in NY almost three years after I went through all the court shit.
2 years ago
7 0
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STEEZUS_CHRI5T
Posts: 3024 - Karma: 23,312
In London, I was brought before an English magistrate, tried for high treason, and condemned to public torture and beheading.

Even whilst being hanged, drawn and quartered, I refused to submit to the king. Cries of mercy came from the watching crowd as they witnessed my valor. The magistrate offered me one final chance, asking me only to utter the word, "Mercy", and be granted a quick death. I instead shouted, "Freedom!", and the judge ordered my death.

Moments before being decapitated, I saw a vision of my life long love smiling at me in the crowd. Boy did get myself into a sticky situation.

**This post was edited on Dec 24th 2022 at 8:29:36pm
2 years ago
10 3
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r00kie
Posts: 5238 - Karma: 59,602
CowboySkibopMe and a friend started a twitter page in like 2016 doing “roast polls” for our school. Shit got mad out of hand. Page blew up to 1000 followers in a day and by 2pm I was in the principals office apologizing profusely and ended up getting off clean cuz he watched me wipe the account and deactivate it.


didn’t stop fucking around on the internet tho. Later that year I made a fake twitter account for our school district and tried to cancel school cuz we were supposed to have a pow day and I wanted to ski. Page blew up again, Misspelled a word like an idiot and people were sus and didn’t believe it. I wiped the account and deactivated and didn’t get in trouble for that one


in the end I learned my lesson and am a better person and don’t fuck around on the internet anymore… except for this site

**This post was edited on Dec 24th 2022 at 2:50:47pm


When I was in high achool someone made their profile appear as the principals and tweeted something about sitting in the office vaping and punishing kids. Was not well received but admin.
2 years ago
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Woody.
Posts: 435 - Karma: 4,891
Not me but in middle school some chick slipped laxatives in the principals coffee
2 years ago
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HypeBeast
Posts: 10063 - Karma: 76,223
In an email as a freshman I told the assistant AD at my university that it was "bs" the lax team (club) couldn't use any athletic fields or facilities for practice or games. We literally had to practice at a fucking elementary school field ffs and travel to every game the first 2 years. This cunt saved my email and tried to use it 4 years later to get our team banned after one of our players got into a very heated verbal argument with the soccer team and their coaches. Said "the lacrosse team has a history of profanity and altercations" and then attached my email to his new email and copied a whole bunch of people. Well he wasn't successful as we had built a good reputation but lesson learned don't email anything you don't want forwarded.


Also got this notification today....TBD

2 years ago
8 0
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littleman34
Posts: 1405 - Karma: 4,256
A couple years ago when I used to do roofing I was up on the roof on a nice day and I had to go poo. I didn't wanna just leave my section and go cuz then the other guys would have to wait for me. So I shingled like hell for 10 minutes and it really shook my bowels up. So I went down the ladder really fast and ran for the trailer (there is a bucket and a garbage bag that we use for pooing in, a different garbage bag for each poo). I got into the trailer and I started rifling around for garbage bags and I just couldnt hold it any longer. I paniced because I didn't wanna poo on the floor of the trailer so I dropped my pants and pood in my hand. But it was too much to hold and it started dropping onto the trailer floor anyway. After it was over I found a bag and put the handfull in it and then worked at cleaning the rest up with scrap shingles and paper towel. I found a wet wipe in the boss truck to clean my smelly hand. All said and done I was back on the roof in maybe 15 minutes. Nobody ever knew so I didn't really get in trouble but it was demoralizing.
2 years ago
11 0
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Whaddup
Posts: 106 - Karma: 592
I got fired from Old Faithful Inn in Yellowstone for going to work on a bunch of acid


but that's what I wanted to happen and it was sick
2 years ago
4 1
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Goretex_Vidal
Posts: 946 - Karma: 13,567
My boss called a company wide meeting to yell at us after I took a diarrhea dump in the lobby bathroom so nasty a cabinet level secretary gagged and had to leave their site visit.

I committed a biological weapons attack and nearly lost our federal contract.
2 years ago
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Casey
Posts: 8017 - Karma: 26,915
I was scheduled to play in an exhibition basketball game over in Russia, tried to sneak in a little ganj except a war broke out and my luggage was subjected to some next level scrutiny. Next thing you know they sentence me to 9 years in the gulag and it’s this whole international incident. So anyway how was your summer break?
2 years ago
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aCHILLes
Posts: 34 - Karma: -51
tapping the manager on our break
both forgot the camera in the office
seems she liked watching it and didn't erase
both canned
2 years ago
3 3
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Lippamani
Posts: 1508 - Karma: 16,348
Most screenshots I've taken in a thread before.
2 years ago
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Lippamani
Posts: 1508 - Karma: 16,348
Uhhh there was a bar down the highway in a big corn field and it burned down so I the master mind got a guy who owned a 4wheeler (I don't remember the year but we were young enough not to have vehicles or permits. ) and my friend who is a blackbelt to come sleep over in my cabin that I built in our woods. No power tools fyi kids you can do this to, I'll post a picture of it.

So I had my driver and my ninja we drive to the field neighboring the bar and crash the wheeler like 10ft into the corn and walk the rest of the way each equipped with dim flashlight camouflage a hammer and a military bags grandpa gave me.
When my grandpa got out everyone was throwing there gear away so he asked people to give their stuff to him so he has lots of random gear in his barn still. And I get the ninja on the job of finding a way in. He ends up climbing a gutter onto the burned through roof and drops down so we call him back up to show us how.

Basically we grab a whole beer fridge worth of beer. And stash it in the floor of my cabin. 3yrs later dad finds out through one of my friends moms because I'm the only one who can keep my mouth shut. Most trouble I've been in.
2 years ago
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Lippamani
Posts: 1508 - Karma: 16,348
Ns isn't letting me post pictures rn I'll try tomorrow
2 years ago
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HypeBeast
Posts: 10063 - Karma: 76,223
Goretex_VidalMy boss called a company wide meeting to yell at us after I took a diarrhea dump in the lobby bathroom so nasty a cabinet level secretary gagged and had to leave their site visit.

I committed a biological weapons attack and nearly lost our federal contract.

That would be a funny news story. "Federal government accused of discrimination after contract pulled as a result of an employee having too stinky of a poop."
2 years ago
5 0
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supremeblientele
Posts: 991 - Karma: 5,736
in middle school, for whatever reason, me and my gang used to "grasshopper" people.

basically u would walk behind someone reach ur hand between their legs, grab that hand with ur other hand from the front, then bounce the person up and down while yelling like a lunatic. it was inescapable. id been unfortunate enough to have had it done on my pre pubescent balls one time when i was caught slipping outside the lunch room. as the inventor of this maneuver i felt some time of way about it.........

the next day i caught the kid by himself walking outside my spanish class. i ran out of the classroom, during class, with my big ass 3 ring middle school binder, wound that bitch up like a baseball bat and wacked homie over the backside of the head, he stumbled into this 4ft 2" chick and sprained her ankle. the kid i wacked was a big boy too. i feel bad for that girl

the kid i wacked didnt snitch, but the girl who got caught up in middle of all this went to the office to get help with her sprained ankle, and they obviously asked what happened.

they called me and the other kid to the office at the same time. we both denied this ever happening and kept it stone cold til our principle decided call all our parents down and show us/them security footage. i have NEVER tried so hard not to burst out laughing after watching that tape. absolute gold. principle/ the girls parents didn't think it was very funny tho.

anyways i got a week of in house suspension, and "grasshopper'ing" fell out of style
2 years ago
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supremeblientele
Posts: 991 - Karma: 5,736
oh another time in spanish class in middle school, we started saying "Shrek es amor, shrek es vida"

are teacher was this late 20's early 30's youtube gamer bro who happened to be mormon........... he looked the phrase up, watched the video, and was apparently traumatized. got another week of in house suspension for that......

these incident happened all within a month of each other too lmao.

god bless my parents
2 years ago
4 0
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swherity
Posts: 248 - Karma: 1,561
I flooded a bathroom in middleschool we filled all the urinals and toilets up with chickpeas and then flushed the shit out of all of them it was wild water was going all into the fucking hallway it was funny as hell
2 years ago
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