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How to properly fart at work?
Cutting the cheese: a fine art mastered by so few.
I fail 75% of the time when I try to fart at work. These suckers linger in the air too. I'll go to a secluded area to get something and let a huge smelly one rip, only to find that someone has followed me for something else and I incidentally crop dust them. It's been happening very often lately (with people I know and not just randos) and I wonder if people think silently, "why does it smell like ass"? I'll fart walking down empty hallways only to pass people who end up walking down said hallway soon after. I'll fart in a stairwell, only to pass my coworker as they enter the stairwell. I'll fart in the bathroom only to walk out and find someone waiting to enter. Yesterday I farted in a room and was pretty confident I'd be good and this coworker walked right in immediately after and stood right in it, all the meanwhile I'm trying to stay composed and not act suspicious.
Do you think they can make the connection that it's me? I work with a lot of women so it's not like I can just let er rip at my desk.
I work in a fighter squadron, so I let 'er rip. I once had a chick yell "no slugs!" when I walked into a room she was occupying alone. It's liberating.
i usually shit in one of my desk drawers as backup
whenever i rip a stinky and get called out for farting, I just open the drawer and show them it wasnt my fart, just my desk shit
if you just sack up and claim it all your problems will go away
Haha hey everyone look at this guy his farts smell like poop lol
This requires atlest a 5 min bathroom break
lol dub post
**This post was edited on Dec 3rd 2018 at 1:59:23pm
i like farting in elevators. kinda like russian roulette when the door opens- will someone be waiting? such a thrill
loud and proud bud. gotta claim that shit
connect a tube from your butt to you mouf and breathe it in
darticus_primeconnect a tube from your butt to you mouf and breathe it in
you are a sick fuck
just do it, if people get mad theyre a reptillian
This thread is amazing. lol crop dusting.
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