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theabortionator
April, 2025

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Best pick up lines, go.

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morganm8
Posts: 8 - Karma: 170
Hey I'm new to newschoolers, hit me with pick up lines for the lolz.
9 years ago
197 44
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californiagrown
Posts: 9794 - Karma: 2,014
Im gonna talk to a mod about getting this thread deleted.
9 years ago
3 25
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DirtYStylE
Posts: 3652 - Karma: 8,892
Tits or GTFO
9 years ago
12 0
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gnar_whal
Posts: 1286 - Karma: 3,788
Ill pee in your butt if you lipslide my rail
9 years ago
17 0
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Rennis_Deynolds
Posts: 2739 - Karma: 19,059
felice looking for pickup lines for that whole foods pu$$y
9 years ago
15 1
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KingGeedorah
Posts: 890 - Karma: 1,577
just post in "Faces of NS"
9 years ago
1 0
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Mingg
Posts: 14046 - Karma: 50,882
Nice tits
9 years ago
11 0
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Brocka_Flocka
Posts: 1215 - Karma: 8,744
Nice Shoes













Wanna Fuck?
9 years ago
7 0
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plyswthsqrrls
Posts: 838 - Karma: 2,272
MinggNice tits


good to know
9 years ago
1 0
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Chubz.
Posts: 13918 - Karma: 25,673
I got my tongue in this chicks ass right
9 years ago
10 0
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PeppermillReno
Posts: 4884 - Karma: -719
Wanna rimjob?
9 years ago
0 6
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ghosthop
Posts: 631 - Karma: 1,027
I got hit on at the airport last week and her opening line was "where did you get that popcorn?". The transition from popcorn to what I was doing that night was smooth as fuck.
9 years ago
10 0
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CameraWiz
Posts: 735 - Karma: 2,112
i can lip blind 2
9 years ago
5 0
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GregFlik
Posts: 449 - Karma: 1,069
Sup, Name's Greg... (Then it can go anywhere from here, ie see below)

-I can ride switch
-I once cheated on an exam
-You look like my future ex-wife
-I applied for bankruptcy twice
-I sometimes forget to put socks on
-I immediately say "sorry" after sex
-I once shotgunned a keg
-My mom is somewhat satisfied with me
-I call my grandparents monthly
-I can't tie a knot in a cherry stem
-I can grow a beard in a month
-Sorry
-Why didn't you swipe right on tinder
-I drive a 2002 Buick LeSabre, and the seats go all the way down
-My eyes are up here
-I have 2 friends, they don't like me
-Do I know you? Oh sorry, my mistake
-Do you know Kyle?
-I occasionally knock before entering rooms
-I got only 2 DUIs this month
-I go to libraries to pick on nerds
-I play D&D, I don't like it
-I make a good Artichoke Dip
-Your parents will like me, sorta
-I just checked an I have a 710 credit score
9 years ago
13 0
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snowfinder
Posts: 2939 - Karma: 34,906
MinggNice tits


Meh seen em
9 years ago
3 0
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FastSpeed
Posts: 646 - Karma: 645
gnar_whalIll pee in your butt if you lipslide my rail


GregFlik-You look like my future ex-wife


best ones yet by far
9 years ago
1 0
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Mingg
Posts: 14046 - Karma: 50,882
https://www.newschoolers.com/videos/watch/802655/I-Love-You---Patrick-Star

6 out of 10 times, it works everytime
9 years ago
5 0
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Crispy.
Posts: 6126 - Karma: 7,753
Your like a star....

...what?

You only look good from far away
9 years ago
4 0
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brotherdad
Posts: 2076 - Karma: 13,068
If I had the choice between stopping the holocaust and going on a date with you, I'd choose the date with you every time.
9 years ago
2 0
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Chubz.
Posts: 13918 - Karma: 25,673
Crispy.Your like a star....

...what?

You only look good from far away


Lol
9 years ago
2 0
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JGWI
Posts: 2842 - Karma: 7,812
https://www.newschoolers.com/videos/watch/802694/Barbershop-Quartet-Hits-On-Girl-From-Taxi---Cyanide--amp--Happiness-Shorts
9 years ago
0 0
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skier58284
Posts: 1705 - Karma: 5,366
You're a qt3.14, will you be my gf?
9 years ago
0 0
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skier58284
Posts: 1705 - Karma: 5,366
californiagrownIm gonna talk to a mod about getting this thread deleted.


You were one of my favorite posters. I even had you at 10/10 karma. I don't like you anymore.

ghosthopI got hit on at the airport last week and her opening line was "where did you get that popcorn?". The transition from popcorn to what I was doing that night was smooth as fuck.


Well... where did you get the popcorn?

And how did your conversation go?
9 years ago
1 0
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btedeschi
Posts: 282 - Karma: 437
-I might not go down in history, but I’ll go down on you!
-Your eyes are as blue as my toilet water at home.
-Roses are Red, Violets are Plants, what are you wearing, under your pants.
9 years ago
2 0
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STwoops
Posts: 2941 - Karma: 5,126
So I heard you were new to newschoolers. Does that mean we can do it twice?
9 years ago
1 0
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Lskier_
Posts: 183 - Karma: 1,968
did it hurt?























when u fell from someones ass into the toilet bull u piece of shit
9 years ago
8 0
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californiagrown
Posts: 9794 - Karma: 2,014
Cats.You were one of my favorite posters. I even had you at 10/10 karma. I don't like you anymore.


I have you at 0/10 fucks given.
9 years ago
1 8
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skier58284
Posts: 1705 - Karma: 5,366
californiagrownI have you at 0/10 fucks given.


-k you are now at 0/10
9 years ago
2 1
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elcornholio
Posts: 797 - Karma: 1,556
*Picture of someone standing in front of a large rock*

"Are you in Pennsylvania? Cuz that's one Big Boulder".
9 years ago
2 0
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Dddsz
Posts: 3042 - Karma: 7,323
You smell like trash.


Can I take you out?
9 years ago
0 0
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cbj
Posts: 2114 - Karma: 1,136
How much does a polar bear weigh?

About 450kg



What's ur number

*this actually worked once
9 years ago
2 0
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ImNotARacist
Posts: 5136 - Karma: -1,030
Hi, You are very beautiful.
9 years ago
1 0
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ghosthop
Posts: 631 - Karma: 1,027
Cats.Well... where did you get the popcorn?

And how did your conversation go?


from the popcorn stand, obviously

as soon as she found out I was just at the terminal early and wasn't actually going to Chicago she was out, it can be hard out here when the ladies just see me as a dick with legs. What happened to mediocre conversation and a nice cuddle?
9 years ago
0 0
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James.May
Posts: 494 - Karma: 321
- Hey wanna play Barbie? Ill be Ken and you can be the box i come in!

- i looked all over IKEA and still couldnt find the one night stand i was looking for, maybe you could help me out with that?
9 years ago
6 0
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chodo
Posts: 274 - Karma: 918
What color are your panties?
9 years ago
1 0
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Spagett+
Posts: 3499 - Karma: 14,884
Lskier_did it hurt?























when u fell from someones ass into the toilet bull u piece of shit


very good one
9 years ago
0 0
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bait
Posts: 1226 - Karma: 3,604
i'm no weatherman but you can expect a solid 10 inches tonight.
9 years ago
7 0
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Deepskier
Posts: 3269 - Karma: 4,864
Ill nose press your box if you lip slide my rail
Are you irish because my dicks dublin
do you work at subway because you give me a foot long
you know those * inches we got this morning guess how i mesured
You can expect 8 inches tonight
Are you water fountain because im thirsty
Are you a lumberjack because you can take care of my wood toight.
Youll see some white fly tonight
How much does a polar bear weigh, enough to break the ice
Hey babe im horrible at pick up lines so nice tits
Dat ass is fat
You can ride my pipe if I can jump through your bushes
I can lip on blind tru
9 years ago
0 0
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_Ryan_
Posts: 1538 - Karma: 3,192
I'm not very confident in the validity of your pink name..... Im watching you.



(also I'm from ontario so if you're a real pink name then hey, I'm Ryan)
9 years ago
0 0
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GregFlik
Posts: 449 - Karma: 1,069
_Ryan_I'm not very confident in the validity of your pink name..... Im watching you.



(also I'm from ontario so if you're a real pink name then hey, I'm Ryan)


Refer to my pickup line list and choose wisely Ryan.
9 years ago
2 0
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whiteboi
Posts: 477 - Karma: 1,228
Hey do you own chickens?





Because you sure know how to raise a cock
9 years ago
1 0
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SACKEDPanda
Posts: 120 - Karma: 140
The stags are roaring. I am too. How bout I stick where you poo.



Or you say this with a full on serious face.

Want to have the worst sex in your life?
9 years ago
0 0
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ANDR01D
Posts: 1181 - Karma: 3,319
Me: Hey girl, my magic watch tells me you're not wearing any underwear.
Girl: Yes I am!
Me: Oh, must be fifteen minutes fast.

9 years ago
4 0
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Deforestation
Posts: 1606 - Karma: 3,194
Me: hey girl, can you backflip?

Her: no?

Me: I can

Works every time












it never works
9 years ago
3 0
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connecticunt
Posts: 847 - Karma: 1,541
Have you ever wondered how lesbians have sex? It's actually quite complicated but I can show you if you'd like
9 years ago
2 0
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deleted5
Posts: 14507 - Karma: 13,510
morganm8Hey I'm new to newschoolers, hit me with pick up lines for the lolz.


Mingghttps://www.newschoolers.com/videos/watch/802655/I-Love-You---Patrick-Star

6 out of 10 times, it works everytime


connecticuntHave you ever wondered how lesbians have sex? It's actually quite complicated but I can show you if you'd like


I put the STD in stud all i need is U
9 years ago
0 0
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Ugmasugma
Posts: 149 - Karma: 277
Hi babe, I wanna be a stud. I've got the STD, now all I need is U.
9 years ago
0 1
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brotherdad
Posts: 2076 - Karma: 13,068
Damn girl, are you my appendix? Because I don't understand how you work, but this feeling in my stomach makes me want to take you out.
9 years ago
2 0
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Slush
Posts: 1916 - Karma: 12,961
I'll give you 5 bucks if you fist me

girls love fistin a dude
9 years ago
1 0
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Zurg
Posts: 1530 - Karma: 5,171
bump best thread ever!
9 years ago
1 1
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Park.
Posts: 2480 - Karma: 4,587
To anyone who wants me to, I will say anythign you want (granted it will be on my gf) but I will record it and post it once my new phone comes in (4 days or so according to tracking number). Tell me what to say non-ski gabber of NS, I will make u proud

This isnt as exciting as doing callouts but if if I break it off, I will repost in this thread and try it on random biddies as well.
9 years ago
0 0
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