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Seeing my parents for first time in a while....

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ComptonKush
Posts: 81 - Karma: 695
A year ago my fathers wife freaked out about me smoking weed. Literally says I am going to live on the street brain-damaged going nowhere in life. she believes smoking impairs driving for WEEKS after smoking once she has a thick headed opinion on it. And after that they took my school savings account and used it to help finance a vacation house and left me with no job and no way to pay for classes basically telling me to fuck off.

I still smoke weed and I have not been close to homeless. I am supposed to eat dinner with them tonight but I don't know if I feel comfortable doing so alone lol I just hate being scrutinized about stuff.

I think for some reason if I brought a girl they didn't know over they would be more respectful.

Does anyone have to deal with this? Maybe not with weed but some other experience?

I feel like Sid the Sloth in Ice Age
May 5 2015 1:29PM
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,469
I can come along and make you seem like an angel if you want
May 5 2015 1:38PM
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dingus
Posts: 1328 - Karma: 7,877
Give them a joint, then they will understand
May 5 2015 1:40PM
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seward
Posts: 5233 - Karma: 2,174
tell them you gave up weed and found Jesus.

Hallelujah
May 5 2015 1:57PM
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~bagelz~
Posts: 1105 - Karma: 1,067
sewardtell them you gave up weed and found Jesus.

Hallelujah


praise jebus.
this might actually work they sound like twats
May 5 2015 2:07PM
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ComptonKush
Posts: 81 - Karma: 695
sewardtell them you gave up weed and found Jesus.

Hallelujah


Its the other way around, jesus found me and he has cleansed me of smoking the devils lettuce. Jesus smokes for me and takes one for the team so I no longer have to smoke weed.

That will for sure work
May 5 2015 2:14PM
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270on420out
Posts: 7494 - Karma: 50,831
How long has it been since you last talked to them?

My moms side of the family is very messed up. I am constantly meeting family members I didn't know I had. My aunts and uncles would hold a grudge against my grandparents for pretty long periods of time. And then my a lot of my cousins would hate their parents for years at a time. I saw my oldest cousin in November. Last time I saw him I was 11 and he was just getting getting married. Now he is 30 something, and has two kids, and works full time.

My advice: don't adress the elephant in the room. Don't bring up weed or anything. Just tell them what you have been doing
May 5 2015 2:31PM
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Spagett+
Posts: 3499 - Karma: 14,884
this is a troll
May 5 2015 2:33PM
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JGWI
Posts: 2842 - Karma: 7,812
Spagett+this is a troll


Takes one to know one.
May 5 2015 2:37PM
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Wampire
Posts: 1217 - Karma: 4,684
Just talk about football a bunch around ur dad, and talk about how much you love gardening to ur mom.
May 5 2015 2:43PM
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NEPTR
Posts: 766 - Karma: 1,936
JustGoWithItTakes one to know one.


rekt m8
May 5 2015 2:45PM
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,469
Tell them weed has turned you into a serial killer. thats a good icebreaker
May 5 2015 2:46PM
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Mr.noodle
Posts: 1361 - Karma: 4,650
If my mom did that to me I wouldn't even want to go Until they had a very persuasive apology. And how old are you? Just wondering
May 5 2015 2:47PM
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Logey.
Posts: 2996 - Karma: 457
Not to be a dick but I feel like you are leaving out some crucial information as to why they would take your college fund and spend it on a vacation house. Maybe i'm wrong and they really suck, but them going to that extreme over catching you smoking is hard to believe.

But good luck, its probably going to be awkward as ballsack.
May 5 2015 3:00PM
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ComptonKush
Posts: 81 - Karma: 695
VizualHow long has it been since you last talked to them?

My moms side of the family is very messed up. I am constantly meeting family members I didn't know I had. My aunts and uncles would hold a grudge against my grandparents for pretty long periods of time. And then my a lot of my cousins would hate their parents for years at a time. I saw my oldest cousin in November. Last time I saw him I was 11 and he was just getting getting married. Now he is 30 something, and has two kids, and works full time.

My advice: don't adress the elephant in the room. Don't bring up weed or anything. Just tell them what you have been doing


The last time I talked to my dads wife was a longtime ago and she always acts like I am up to no good when I talk to her after what happened. My friends tell me that she is evil lol, and I have always tried to be nice to her even through what she did.

My dad talks to me often though. Its like his wife has this close minded idea of how I am supposed to live and she doesn't want me to influence her kids who are 18 years old and she thinks they are much better off in the world than I am saying they have plans and all this and that. Ignoring what I want to do in life treating me as a burnout pothead. She thinks I have brain damage because I smoked weed when I was 16 its that bad.

Its kind of fucked up but I got my own friends, house and shit so its cool. They can live in their bubble of what ever they think and want to do.

I'm just kind of hesitant wanting to eat dinner with them, I'm going to see if this neighbor girl will help me out. It would be much better with her there instead of just me I think.
May 5 2015 3:13PM
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ComptonKush
Posts: 81 - Karma: 695
Logey.Not to be a dick but I feel like you are leaving out some crucial information as to why they would take your college fund and spend it on a vacation house. Maybe i'm wrong and they really suck, but them going to that extreme over catching you smoking is hard to believe.

But good luck, its probably going to be awkward as ballsack.


My dad knew I was smoking and have been smoking for a while had no issues with it. Then my step mom finds out for the first time she freaks out and shit really gets fucked on some other level. She views cannabis like Heroin not even lying I didn't even know people where that brainwashed.

My dad would never force me out of classes, the day classes start without some woman ranting about how I am some drug addicted burnout going nowhere. That is honestly how she views me and thats what she says to my dad and entire family.

I am sure she will get over it once I show her I am back in school though with out any of their help paying for college out of my pocket, because that's whats about to happen.
May 5 2015 3:22PM
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saskskier
Posts: 4772 - Karma: 9,984
TheFireThe last time I talked to my dads wife was a longtime ago and she always acts like I am up to no good when I talk to her after what happened. My friends tell me that she is evil lol, and I have always tried to be nice to her even through what she did.

My dad talks to me often though. Its like his wife has this close minded idea of how I am supposed to live and she doesn't want me to influence her kids who are 18 years old and she thinks they are much better off in the world than I am saying they have plans and all this and that. Ignoring what I want to do in life treating me as a burnout pothead. She thinks I have brain damage because I smoked weed when I was 16 its that bad.

Its kind of fucked up but I got my own friends, house and shit so its cool. They can live in their bubble of what ever they think and want to do.

I'm just kind of hesitant wanting to eat dinner with them, I'm going to see if this neighbor girl will help me out. It would be much better with her there instead of just me I think.


If you think things are going to be awkward between you and your dad/his wife, think how awkward it's going to be for whatever girl you decide to bring along, especially if your parents decide they want to get into it with you.

I would try to have a decent conversation with them. Let them know how you've been doing and what you've been accomplishing. There is a pretty good chance they are just worried about you and want the best for you and feel like using weed is going to hinder your potential. Talk about what's been going well and build on that. Don't get all up in arms and spend your time making a stand on the benefits of weed because it's going to fall on deaf ears.

Just my thoughts.
May 5 2015 3:31PM
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Lé.Skiing
Posts: 10035 - Karma: 8,122
bring dessert, and by dessert I mean weed brownies. Make sure she has one.
May 5 2015 4:22PM
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ComptonKush
Posts: 81 - Karma: 695
saskskierIf you think things are going to be awkward between you and your dad/his wife, think how awkward it's going to be for whatever girl you decide to bring along, especially if your parents decide they want to get into it with you.

I would try to have a decent conversation with them. Let them know how you've been doing and what you've been accomplishing. There is a pretty good chance they are just worried about you and want the best for you and feel like using weed is going to hinder your potential. Talk about what's been going well and build on that. Don't get all up in arms and spend your time making a stand on the benefits of weed because it's going to fall on deaf ears.

Just my thoughts.


haha yeah I do not want to debate anything about the benefits of weed I will sound like a dumb stoned kid to them. I just want them to realize I am not homeless and brain damaged like she thought.

I kind of want to let them know I still smoke weed just because they have some bad views on it. My step mom thinks alcohol on the other hand is perfectly ok to over indulge in with little health consequnces.
May 5 2015 4:31PM
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seward
Posts: 5233 - Karma: 2,174
your dad seems like a bitch.

tell him he should come with you to meet Jesus.

Hallelujah
May 5 2015 5:17PM
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Mr.noodle
Posts: 1361 - Karma: 4,650
TheFireMy dad knew I was smoking and have been smoking for a while had no issues with it. Then my step mom finds out for the first time she freaks out and shit really gets fucked on some other level. She views cannabis like Heroin not even lying I didn't even know people where that brainwashed.


Your dad kinda sounds like a little bitch for letting her do that
May 5 2015 5:19PM
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ComptonKush
Posts: 81 - Karma: 695
Mr.noodleIf my mom did that to me I wouldn't even want to go Until they had a very persuasive apology. And how old are you? Just wondering


I am 20, she tried to apologize to me but then turned it around saying its because she cares about me and basically aknowledge everything she said was ok. They were my only real family now its kind of weird because she never calls me to say hi or anything. She just kicked me to the curb and said I'll be homeless. Then they go and buy a new house with my college money.

If I had a kid and they were on some real drugs and I was worried I would make them move home and I would be constantly checking up on them.

Is my reasoning off at all? I don't want her messing with my life goals and stuff putting my future in jeopardy just because she wants me to live a specific lifestyle.
May 5 2015 6:16PM
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mike759
Posts: 872 - Karma: 1,949
have you made any decent accomplishments to tell them about?
college?
job?
house?
etc.
May 5 2015 9:28PM
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miroz
Posts: 10333 - Karma: 3,947
TheFireI kind of want to let them know I still smoke weed just because they have some bad views on it. My step mom thinks alcohol on the other hand is perfectly ok to over indulge in with little health consequnces.


This would be very stupid. Some older people have very close minded views about that stuff and aren't willing to accept it in any form. Just leave it be, recognize that she sucks, and let them back into your life.

You should also remember that your dad is a person too, a human outside of the definition of "dad." He probably really misses you and cares about you, no matter what his stupid wife thinks.
May 5 2015 10:10PM
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Nikolaus
Posts: 863 - Karma: 995
who technically had authority over your savings account?
May 5 2015 11:26PM
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californiagrown
Posts: 9794 - Karma: 2,014
Have you had a heart to heart with your dad, without the wife there? Sounds like your dad and you are on good terms and kinda on the same page.


Regardless, i would go to dinner and try to treat it like a date - be polite, funny and charismatic. tell funny stories from your life that are parent appropriate, talk about friends you have, cool stuff you done and places youve been. If they ask about weed do not lie, just say that you disagree with their view, and then say that you came there tonight to have a good time and catch up with everyone, not to sit down and work out family problems... then immediately ask the WIFE a question about her life. just deflect those types of questions.
May 5 2015 11:53PM
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-MK-
Posts: 3253 - Karma: 5,332
Just go, and have a good time seeing your dad. If they start to bring shit up respectfully defend yourself, and if they continue just walk out, and tell your dad you don't intend to have a relationship with him until him and his wife get their shit together, and respect you.
May 6 2015 1:17AM
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-MK-
Posts: 3253 - Karma: 5,332
-MK-Just go, and have a good time seeing your dad. If they start to bring shit up respectfully defend yourself, and if they continue just walk out, and tell your dad you don't intend to have a relationship with him until him and his wife get their shit together, and respect you.


Or at least his wife, obviously you should have a relationship with your father
May 6 2015 1:18AM
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BigScaryLarry
Posts: 1448 - Karma: 2,732
honestly it sounds like this your dads wife is in no way a motherly figure to you and in that case i would say to only agree to have dinner with your dad. if she wants to kick you to curb and hasn't even tried to make any contact with you to see how you are doing then honestly kick her to the curb just as hard. she will get it when you make it clear you don't want her to be a part of your life. but idk just my 5 cents. if she comes and is disrespectful just get up and apologize to you dad, say nothing to that bitch and walk out. also make some snide comment about how she spent your college fun on a vacation home for herself which is extremely selfish
May 6 2015 2:16PM
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californiagrown
Posts: 9794 - Karma: 2,014
Strange.Journey.honestly it sounds like this your dads wife is in no way a motherly figure to you and in that case i would say to only agree to have dinner with your dad. if she wants to kick you to curb and hasn't even tried to make any contact with you to see how you are doing then honestly kick her to the curb just as hard. she will get it when you make it clear you don't want her to be a part of your life. but idk just my 5 cents. if she comes and is disrespectful just get up and apologize to you dad, say nothing to that bitch and walk out. also make some snide comment about how she spent your college fun on a vacation home for herself which is extremely selfish


Facepalm. That's all I can really say about the above.
May 6 2015 2:24PM
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Steezy_IN_KC
Posts: 2033 - Karma: 1,607
How did the dinner go?
May 6 2015 2:24PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51263 - Karma: 157,459
I would do it and tell them to fuck off. That's pretty shitty. No need to go there and be all timid and try to reconcile. I'd be like fuck you, fuck you, I'm out if they said anything stupid.

IMO you don't owe them shit. Idk, I'm a man of principle for better or many times worse and just don't think I would even try to move past that shit unless they were telling me how sorry they were.

BEst of luck regardless man.
May 6 2015 2:32PM
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seward
Posts: 5233 - Karma: 2,174
bring a pie and i am 100% certain all will be forgotten.

strawberry rhubarb.
May 6 2015 2:39PM
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corona
Posts: 12752 - Karma: 32,266
sewardbring a pie and i am 100% certain all will be forgotten.

strawberry rhubarb.


strawberry rhubarb is much better in crumble or crisp form
May 6 2015 2:45PM
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youngdtay
Posts: 3122 - Karma: -112
I would've honestly denied the invitation and I probably wouldn't even have kept in contact with them if possible if they were my parents.
Maybe I'm just a shitty person but I couldn't forgive them in a year for squandering my college savings WHILE I'm going to college, all because I scorched a few bowls.

I'm also gonna go ahead say there might be more to this sorry.
May 6 2015 2:47PM
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californiagrown
Posts: 9794 - Karma: 2,014
Dr.Nitrog3nI would've honestly denied the invitation and I probably wouldn't even have kept in contact with them if possible if they were my parents.
Maybe I'm just a shitty person but I couldn't forgive them in a year for squandering my college savings WHILE I'm going to college, all because I scorched a few bowls.

I'm also gonna go ahead say there might be more to this sorry.


Lol, it was THEIR savings you spoiled dick. It wasn't his.
May 6 2015 3:01PM
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youngdtay
Posts: 3122 - Karma: -112
californiagrownLol, it was THEIR savings you spoiled dick. It wasn't his.


Uhhh, either way, your parents telling you that they'll pay for your schooling, and then finessing you out of it all because of a personal choice that you made is incredibly ridiculous.
May 6 2015 6:57PM
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daannnnieel
Posts: 5163 - Karma: 4,293
TheFireIts the other way around, jesus found me and he has cleansed me of smoking the devils lettuce. Jesus smokes for me and takes one for the team so I no longer have to smoke weed.

That will for sure work


I like your wraparound logic, it'll get them good.

But anyways, it sounds like it's your Dad, and your step(?) mom. Regardless, if you're saying dad and his wife it can't be good.

Just show up, girl or not, and be respectful. Don't bring anything up until the end of the dinner, and if it went well, it went well. No need to bring anything up at all. Just let it be, it's cool.


If you can't stand being there due to dumb stuff, make a stupid excuse and just leave.


And if they start chewing you out, if you don't have a girl just tell them the fuck off. Let them know that you're doing fine, and that smoking weed doesn't kill most people.

And if you have a girl there, and they start chewing you out, keep composed and leave.
May 6 2015 7:11PM
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fresh_prince
Posts: 993 - Karma: 11,910
fuck ur parents, they seem like assholes
May 6 2015 7:12PM
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soulskier
Posts: 17805 - Karma: 3,821
Left you without a job?



Stay away from the weed issue

If there isn't anything other than weed that you would like to talk about, pass
May 6 2015 11:59PM
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DGski
Posts: 3491 - Karma: 2,328
The referenced post has been removed.


you're at harvard but you are dumb as all fuck
May 7 2015 3:27AM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51263 - Karma: 157,459
soulskierLeft you without a job?


this lol. I just want some real life jerry springer action though. Even if it's not even real life, just make something happen OP.

PS, I recommend having sarah mclachlan- in the arms of an angle on your phone with a speaker ready to go. Mid dinner start into your sad tale and hit play on this. Everyone will start crying and then hug it out and it will be beautiful. Film it and you could end up with billions of views and a ton of loot from ads online.
May 7 2015 6:55AM
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cool_name
Posts: 4295 - Karma: 3,131
just take a couple bong hits to calm the nerves
May 7 2015 6:57PM
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