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theabortionator
May, 2025

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My girlfriend is better than yours. FACT.

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ianrich511
Posts: 511 - Karma: 723
So yesterday my girlfriend asks me when UPS delivers packages, and I tell her its usually around 6pm but my order came at 2pm the other week. She lets me know that she is expecting package and to be on the lookout. As I am pulling into my driveway, I see a large box. There was an EVO mark on the outside, and I slam on the brakes. Suspicious as hell, I run to the front porch and grab the box. The weight was 12 pounds and I am thinking, what the hell did she order that could be 12 pounds. Before I know it the razor blades out and the box is open.



Now the best part, why did the box weigh as much as it did? I was a little suspicious that she might someday order me these boots as she had asked about them before because I wanted to buy them before the season. The reason I had not was I wanted to go to a shop and make sure to get the right size. So what did she do, order two pairs so I could try on the two I was between.

I ask her what was going on, and she replies "Did you open mail that was addressed to me?" In shock and awe, I told her it all happened so fast. She replied "Well I knew it would be hard to keep from you... Happy Early Birthday!"

Which is over a month away.
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10 years ago
231 45
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yelsel
Posts: 12967 - Karma: 3,451
you wife her right now!
10 years ago
37 0
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-benedetto
Posts: 5238 - Karma: 1,359
Yup. Great catch!
10 years ago
1 0
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milk_man
Posts: 5252 - Karma: 5,975
So if I had a really rich girlfriend who bought me a wrx would she be better than yours?



Just kidding man, stoked for you :D
10 years ago
5 9
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Barefootin_Fiend
Posts: 7618 - Karma: 4,727
put a ring on that shit....
10 years ago
14 0
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ianrich511
Posts: 511 - Karma: 723
yelselyou wife her right now!


thats the plan!

milk_manSo if I had a really rich girlfriend who bought me a wrx would she be better than yours?



Just kidding man, stoked for you :D


That would be some next level shit!

Barefootin_Fiendput a ring on that shit....


as stated, planning on it!
10 years ago
8 0
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gotti
Posts: 4269 - Karma: 4,552
ianrich511thats the plan!



That would be some next level shit!



as stated, planning on it!


karma says she finds the ring before you propose
10 years ago
21 0
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ESAND
Posts: 1607 - Karma: 744
Let's not exaggerate here, your girlfriend bought you ski boots.

It's not like she arranged for a threesome with a friend.
10 years ago
2 13
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Dobber
Posts: 1698 - Karma: 9,832
ESANDLet's not exaggerate here, your girlfriend bought you ski boots.

It's not like she arranged for a threesome with a friend.


If you like threesomes better than brand new full tilts...your priorities are fucked.
10 years ago
22 1
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JAHpow
Posts: 7282 - Karma: 17,194
DobberIf you like threesomes better than brand new full tilts...your priorities are fucked.


What if it's a threesome and everyone is wearing full tilts?
10 years ago
20 0
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SKI.ING
Posts: 2695 - Karma: 2,536
Bootfitter
10 years ago
1 1
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,488
DobberIf you like threesomes better than brand new full tilts...your priorities are fucked.


full tilts are garbage so ya id rather have a threesome
10 years ago
9 3
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Dobber
Posts: 1698 - Karma: 9,832
.Hugo.full tilts are garbage so ya id rather have a threesome


I don't like them either, but you can still sell them and buy cool shit... Like threesomes.
10 years ago
1 1
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Chewy.
Posts: 4113 - Karma: 4,856
Hey. You go ring shopping now.
10 years ago
3 0
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ESAND
Posts: 1607 - Karma: 744
DobberI don't like them either, but you can still sell them and buy cool shit... Like threesomes.


Now with extra syphilis.
10 years ago
0 0
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Anathema
Posts: 21048 - Karma: 5,062
what have you done for her lately?

remember that when she dumps you.
10 years ago
0 7
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S.J.W
Posts: 7609 - Karma: 31,172
I'm going to hate on you because I'm so jealous
10 years ago
0 0
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ModMommy
Posts: 10877 - Karma: 58,290
DUDE that's one hell of a babe. Stoked for ya dude
10 years ago
0 0
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Japaneezy
Posts: 1039 - Karma: 4,268
jealous.
10 years ago
0 0
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broto
Posts: 9040 - Karma: 25,673
damn ur girlfriend sounds sick yo is she available?
10 years ago
4 0
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Petey.
Posts: 5736 - Karma: 4,890
wife
10 years ago
0 0
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JAHpow
Posts: 7282 - Karma: 17,194
Chewy.Hey. You go ring shopping now.


Yeah OP or he'll pretend to ban you.

brotodamn ur girlfriend sounds sick yo is she available?


Hahaha
10 years ago
0 0
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Chewy.
Posts: 4113 - Karma: 4,856
JAHpowYeah OP or he'll pretend to ban you.



Hahaha


Hahaha +k.
10 years ago
0 0
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theabortionator
Posts: 52609 - Karma: 174,419
Damn. All my girl got me was a carton of smokes. She grabbed me one day and said "Smoke up rusty". Oh wait, that's not right.


That's awesome man! Nice catch. Tell her that the internet is jealous.
10 years ago
1 0
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theabortionator
Posts: 52609 - Karma: 174,419
Also I feel that it should be a rule that if you post a title like " My girlfriend is batter than yours" that at least one pic is involved.
10 years ago
7 0
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yangumane
Posts: 1816 - Karma: 3,349
JAHpowYeah OP or he'll pretend to ban you.



Hahaha


Chewy.Hahaha +k.


Hahaha
10 years ago
0 0
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Drail
Posts: 14045 - Karma: 10,323
Seriously. The status of your girlfriend is still in question until we see pics. Boots be damned!
10 years ago
8 0
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Slush
Posts: 1916 - Karma: 12,961
Pics needed for..... Reference
10 years ago
4 0
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cornholio
Posts: 3952 - Karma: 3,057
ITT: poor people too excited over boots

pics required to tell if she's better or not
10 years ago
4 0
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AGOF
Posts: 2038 - Karma: 3,608
cornholioITT: poor people too excited over boots

pics required to tell if she's better or not


ITT: people who would be stoked to have a SO that wanted them to do the things they like?
10 years ago
0 0
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cornholio
Posts: 3952 - Karma: 3,057
A-cAllITT: people who would be stoked to have a SO that wanted them to do the things they like?


my SO wants me to do the things i like too. if she ugly as dirt i could care less if she buys me things
10 years ago
0 0
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cornholio
Posts: 3952 - Karma: 3,057
cornholiomy SO wants me to do the things i like too. if she ugly as dirt i could care less if she buys me things


*buys me inexpensive things. my cutoff for fat chicks is $10k+
10 years ago
1 1
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ESAND
Posts: 1607 - Karma: 744
A-cAllITT: people who would be stoked to have a SO that wanted them to do the things they like?


Having a girlfriend buy you presents for your birthday is not uncommon. Having a SO that recognizes that you may want to fuck another chick and not only supports that but wants to be involved? Now that's a keeper.
10 years ago
0 0
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Krotchs_Brother
Posts: 1134 - Karma: 3,015
My girl bought me a PS4 for my birthday. If this was a competition I'd be winning.







Fuck it, it's a competition.










And I'm winning.
10 years ago
5 1
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robbinJAHood
Posts: 1202 - Karma: 3,077
aww that's awesome!
10 years ago
1 0
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Byron_tha_gr8
Posts: 4573 - Karma: 14,302
savvy_skiaww that's awesome!


not without pics it isnt
10 years ago
0 1
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ianrich511
Posts: 511 - Karma: 723
Anathemawhat have you done for her lately?

remember that when she dumps you.


After 5+ years, if she was going to, she would have by now.

cornholiomy SO wants me to do the things i like too. if she ugly as dirt i could care less if she buys me things


I am so confused by this.

Krotchs_BrotherMy girl bought me a PS4 for my birthday. If this was a competition I'd be winning.







Fuck it, it's a competition.










And I'm winning.



If we are competing according to highest dollar figure, then yes, you are. Now if its what is cooler, I am.




And just cause I like you trolls.

10 years ago
6 1
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.frenchy
Posts: 18231 - Karma: 12,399
.Hugo.full tilts are garbage so ya id rather have a threesome


must suck to have wide troll feet, huh???

:( :( :(
10 years ago
0 0
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,488
.frenchymust suck to have wide troll feet, huh???

:( :( :(


I wear dalbellos same last as full tilts loser
10 years ago
0 0
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.frenchy
Posts: 18231 - Karma: 12,399
.Hugo.I wear dalbellos same last as full tilts loser


get full tilts xD
10 years ago
1 1
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S.J.W
Posts: 7609 - Karma: 31,172
ianrich511After 5+ years, if she was going to, she would have by now.



I am so confused by this.




If we are competing according to highest dollar figure, then yes, you are. Now if its what is cooler, I am.




And just cause I like you trolls.



Your girlfriend looks like she's going to be the biggest milf
10 years ago
5 0
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JAHpow
Posts: 7282 - Karma: 17,194
ianrich511After 5+ years, if she was going to, she would have by now.



I am so confused by this.




If we are competing according to highest dollar figure, then yes, you are. Now if its what is cooler, I am.




And just cause I like you trolls.



We're all invited to the wedding right?
10 years ago
3 0
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dustygoldflakes
Posts: 484 - Karma: 700
That is soo hype
10 years ago
0 0
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.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,488
ianrich511


thanks for delivering. you guys look like you could be siblings
10 years ago
4 0
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ESAND
Posts: 1607 - Karma: 744
So the OP's GF is hot. That's good. Could be his sister, not so good.
10 years ago
2 0
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yeahno
Posts: 4008 - Karma: 3,414
Maybe she's cheating on you and this helped her sleep at night. Just a thought.
10 years ago
5 1
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Laurent.
Posts: 10056 - Karma: 25,311
I regret nothing.

10 years ago
12 1
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Byron_tha_gr8
Posts: 4573 - Karma: 14,302
Laurent.I regret nothing.



shes cute with your face.

have kids.
10 years ago
1 0
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airplaneface
Posts: 219 - Karma: 685
No one is better than Jill
10 years ago
0 0
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ABalls
Posts: 2091 - Karma: 3,754
Wear the boots at the alter
10 years ago
0 0
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ianrich511
Posts: 511 - Karma: 723
UglyboyYour girlfriend looks like she's going to be the biggest milf


If her mom is any indicator, I am a lucky man.

JAHpowWe're all invited to the wedding right?


Only one of you. I will revisit this thread when it's time.

.Hugo.thanks for delivering. you guys look like you could be siblings


Laurent.I regret nothing.



God damn 😂 this is why I love NS, and the internet.

ABallsWear the boots at the alter


Might have to.
10 years ago
2 0
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