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theabortionator
April, 2025

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She "doesnt want a boyfriend"? i need help from the ladies

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c-wayne
Posts: 253 - Karma: 906
long story short, met this girl at work through mutual friends, she got my number and we hit it off. Same personalities (very outgoing and fun) same interests and she snowboards wich is also a huge plus. We hung out a few times over the past 3 weeks and hooked up alot but didnt have sex. shes a virgin and doesnt really talk to many guys it seemed like for the most part, and so she sais, but she always seemed to have a shitton of dudes texting her. In all honesty, i usually play my cards really tight with girls but i felt like everything between us was perfect so i kinda started to really like her. She had been texting me nonstop and always willing to hangout anytime. Then last saturday she tells me (randomly) that shed lost feelings for us being together and she really had to tell me. I was dumbfounded because everything betwen us was flawless and perfect (so i thought). I asked why and she said she didnt really want a boyfriend anymore because she was scared it "wouldnt be worth her time, and she might get hurt" wich i initially thought was a bunch of bs.

So we decided to hang again after that and things were different when we did. She wasnt as fun, and wasnt as into me it seemed. I talked to her about it and she told me the same things as sunday and that it wasnt another guy and that it was "just her and not me" So then 3 days ago we end it because she said shes not ready for a bf and wants to just be friends.

So, i know this is not lm but what the fuck? Im so mad. what we had was amazing, like we clicked perfectly and everything was amazing and she like decided to blow it off.

So we havnt really talked since we broke it off, 2 days ago she texted me and i gave her short answers and she stopped texting me after a few short answers.

How should i handle this? We had something amazing and for some reason she didnt care or see it. I dont wanna be the one to text/call her first because i feel like she should be the one to come to me and fix things. Why would she not want what we had? And do you think i should wait a few days and then talk to her if she doesnt talk to me or what?
13 years ago
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Mr.Capone
Posts: 1227 - Karma: 109
This is terrible advice. "Romance the hell out of her"...really man? Sounds like a surefire way to prove to her you're just like every other guy willing to bend over backward for her bullshit. Best thing to do is ignore her or act like you're over it while still managing to keep sexual tension.

My best guess is you were too into her too fast. "We were meant to be together" "we were so perfect for each other" blahhh blah blahh. These are typical dude fell way too fast for girl and girl got scared because dude was more into her than she wanted him to be phrases. Sounds like you were only hanging out and doing stuff for a couple weeks. Why push for the boyfriend thing and not just keep things fun and undefined? Would have worked much better.

Remember that relationships are something of a power balance. If you've shown all your cards you come off as weak, boring, and just like every other guy that makes shallow passes at her (and if she's hot she sees this a lot). What you need to do is keep things interesting, fun and most of all exciting. Excitement early in relationship is what gets her heart going and makes her into you, not being sappy and getting limp noodle syndrome.

Good luck with it. Sounds like you're young so at least this will be a good learning experience for the future.
13 years ago
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TRASHY.
Posts: 736 - Karma: 355
if she still likes you and you ignore her, she will come running back.
13 years ago
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RoofDaRoofieDogg
Posts: 3090 - Karma: 1,990
I ignored your post in the did you know thread. Wheres my blowjob?
13 years ago
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myllhouse
Posts: 1064 - Karma: 2,163
saw long story short. then saw a story.. still read it.

cock slap her back into your life
13 years ago
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TRASHY.
Posts: 736 - Karma: 355
um there was not relationship in the first place, therefore no blowjob.
13 years ago
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TheClap.
Posts: 21685 - Karma: 4,249
lies, your TRASHY.......
13 years ago
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TRASHY.
Posts: 736 - Karma: 355
and you have the clap..... gross
13 years ago
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Backyard.Skier
Posts: 5397 - Karma: 1,498
how do you know this?
13 years ago
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TheClap.
Posts: 21685 - Karma: 4,249
Bc shes Trashy
13 years ago
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RoofDaRoofieDogg
Posts: 3090 - Karma: 1,990
Well, there goes MY plans for the weekend...
13 years ago
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blackmamba.
Posts: 969 - Karma: 56
'hurt' is code for being used

me thinks you took it too fast and seeing as she's a virgin, she's scared/unsure of the prospect of losing her v-card and then getting dumped. she's held on to it for a reason, and sadly, you're not the answer. bitches be cray, my friend.

therefore, friend zone for you.
13 years ago
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feihlination
Posts: 8356 - Karma: 1,083
how old are you? very important
13 years ago
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zooded.
Posts: 152 - Karma: 75
... i hate to say this but maybe their was another guy? ik a girl who did that to my best friend, she was flirting with him non stop but was hooking up with another guy behind his back. girls can be bitches sometimes, i wouldn't ditch completely, just don't make her the priority. hang out with other chicks and maybe you'll find one that's better than her anyway.

do you know anything about her previous relationships? maybe she dated a guy that ended up hurting her, and maybe that relationship started off how you guys did... maybe she thinks it's too good to be true and doesn't want to put herself through that again


13 years ago
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c-wayne
Posts: 253 - Karma: 906
lol update: i just banged one of her friends and have another date with her monday she still hasnt talked to me so fuck her!! YOLO!!!!! im over her shit
13 years ago
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rtav
Posts: 227 - Karma: 90
NSG, I'm proud of you guys. This thread was basically solid advice for a whole day. Wow
13 years ago
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1337
Posts: 31078 - Karma: 29,667
Its not summer yet
13 years ago
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TheClap.
Posts: 21685 - Karma: 4,249
^its summer in VA, y'all come party
13 years ago
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Thadius.Castle
Posts: 1436 - Karma: 252
Wait til she gets a boyfriend, take his knees out with a tire iron, then chain her in your basement and feed her Baby Ruths. .

Wait, I already replied.
13 years ago
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KEVTRON
Posts: 3545 - Karma: 1,222
Tease.
13 years ago
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Bogs
Posts: 4296 - Karma: 1,361
how do you have a date with her monday if you still haven't talked to her? oh wait, thats just your terrible grammar. also, i think its pretty clear now why she didn't want to be with you...
13 years ago
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KEVTRON
Posts: 3545 - Karma: 1,222
so thats how it works now? you fuck a girl then take her our on a date? thought it was the opposite.
13 years ago
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Pussy_Sauce
Posts: 381 - Karma: 23
Don't linger


Bitches have always and will always act really fucking dumb




I fucked a bitch a few times in a few days and then shes like

"Uhh i feel like your looking for a GF and i don't want a relationship"


Im like bitch you invited me to dinner, you got me drunk and you sucked my dick, and I am the one looking for a GF...

#woman logic
13 years ago
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kaydawg
Posts: 15 - Karma: 21
I'd have to disagree with the always wanting boyfriends thing..
1. you're in the friend zone.
2. did you ever consider that you did nothing wrong? what if she just doesn't like you?
3. other fish in the sea, blah blah blah
4. she's a snowboarder?? come onnnnn
13 years ago
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kaydawg
Posts: 15 - Karma: 21
I figured it out!! its because you're a giant douche!
13 years ago
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snowdon
Posts: 2480 - Karma: 391
Sucks but...this exactly
13 years ago
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1337
Posts: 31078 - Karma: 29,667
ehh, not sure about that. I know girls who have been in awful relationships before and are scared to get back into one.
13 years ago
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Ski_Alot
Posts: 5921 - Karma: 3,832
fuck her best friends
13 years ago
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snowdon
Posts: 2480 - Karma: 391
So have I, but I'm still not dumb enough to turn down the right guy. I'm sure there are a few girls who truly are loners and don't want a relationship, but if you get that line, pretty much 9 times out of 10 it does just mean she isn't interested in you.
13 years ago
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c_roll
Posts: 584 - Karma: 246
no





but really
13 years ago
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1337
Posts: 31078 - Karma: 29,667
thankfully its been told to me as a friend, about another guy. Just saying
13 years ago
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Pussy_Sauce
Posts: 381 - Karma: 23
What if the chick isn't lonely and just likes fucking, that is an exception, right?
13 years ago
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Heart
Posts: 6156 - Karma: 3,464
Didn't even read the thread but ObeseBunny's diagnosis: THE FRIENDZONE. Good luck man, all hope may be lost
13 years ago
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feihlination
Posts: 8356 - Karma: 1,083
thats probably the point. like two days after "this perfect connection" OP goes to fuck another chick.

no problem with that, but i love how he basically said that the original girl was his only and perfect chance to be happy for eternity, yet fucks another girl two days later just because the possibility was there.

obviously the first girl doesnt want him, but OP is full of shit
13 years ago
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Kurah
Posts: 3 - Karma: 10
Damn, that sucks. If I were you, I'd forget her. I've personally been in this situation before, ofcourse I was the girl, and I felt horrible for doing it. It was honestly the only way to have him stop feeling something for me. She probably feels bad. That would be my guess, but she isn't telling you. If you stop talking to her, and act like you just don't care, she's bound to come back and try to be friends again.
13 years ago
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Kurah
Posts: 3 - Karma: 10
i was thinkin the same thing.
13 years ago
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t-roy
Posts: 4041 - Karma: 52
just do the Naked Man from how i met your mother...that will take care of things.
13 years ago
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shane-mcwannabe
Posts: 27 - Karma: 597
So there is deffentally another guy and whatever you felt she never felt the same way cause you didn't make the moves on her. If you know she's texting a lot of guys that's your sign that you need to act fast. Girls attention span is one a few weeks, speaking from experience. Also you probally seemed too needy, we can sense desperation
11 years ago
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Byron_tha_gr8
Posts: 4573 - Karma: 14,302
What a bump. Probably still really relevant.
11 years ago
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Rusticles
Posts: 2180 - Karma: 1,337
This. Short to the point text messages, always have something else to keep you busy or at least say you do.

Also, maybe after hooking up she didn't think you were much of a stallion sexually.
11 years ago
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MuckMaestro
Posts: 65 - Karma: 48
just give her the ol dipset. on to the next one
11 years ago
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deleted5
Posts: 14507 - Karma: 13,510
You can't make every girl in the world want to have sex with you, but you can make them have sex with you. hope that helps
11 years ago
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MNS
Posts: 5386 - Karma: 3,241
She just likes the thrill of the chase. Immature and not worth your time, move on.
11 years ago
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DIX~
Posts: 4695 - Karma: 6,502
>there are people on ns that don't pay attention to dates
11 years ago
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MNS
Posts: 5386 - Karma: 3,241
I don't pay attention to my dates, chicks dig assholes.
11 years ago
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Rusticles
Posts: 2180 - Karma: 1,337
fuck just realized this is two years old
11 years ago
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goodnoooo
Posts: 555 - Karma: 2,075
age?
11 years ago
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ThatMNkid
Posts: 157 - Karma: 548
Welcome to the very ok world of reality, you'll see you can kind of fit in here, but not perfectly.
11 years ago
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TheBigApple
Posts: 1169 - Karma: 488
ignore her...

works everytime, 37% of the time
11 years ago
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snowpocalypse
Posts: 1036 - Karma: 3,526
Good job son, Nothing gets you out of the friend zone faster that hooking up with a friend of hers. The facts are out as to why she originally didn't want the relationship but Jealously is the real deal. Its all about supply and demand boys and girls.
11 years ago
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.Apex.
Posts: 2097 - Karma: 1,556
Pretend not to care... Talk to other girls... She'll want the D
11 years ago
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