As i stand victorious on top of my new throne, i gaze out upon all that is mine, and cackle triumphantly. For many years (seconds?) I rule the land, until one day, a force that was unseen attacked without warning.
Knocked from my perch, I tumbled down down dow, until resting where i had started my journey.
"Why now!" i curse the gods above for the terrible fate they have given me. Picking myself up, i wipe the blood from under my nose and stare up at the army I must face if i want to regain my almighty position.
Alas, i am left with nothing. In frustration I jam my hands into my pockets, and feel something in the farthest reaches. Rapidly i dig, and am amazed to find a 4 foot coil of rope. I realize this is my only help, and start the trek back up the mountain, rope over my shoulder...
All of a sudden, a shower comes upon me. The ruler of the mountain, whether an attempt to kill me or aid me, i shall never know, has kicked a large rock down from his position. Instead of shrinking away i rapidly step in front, and stop the rock. Taking my rope, i fashion a crude mace. Now, for the first time in years, i can feel the electrified blood of battle coursing through my veins.
Higher i climb now, anf faster than ever. When I reach my first opponent, i barely stop. Sprinting as fast as the wind, i recklessly spin my mace and crash it into his skull before kicking him down the mountain.
This relentless onslaught scares away the blue warrior of magic, and when i get to her, she realizes there is no hope against my immense might. I brandish my weapon and put on a menacing face, and she runs, for death is surly imminent. "2 down, 2 to go, as i trudge on"
The orange knight proves to be a long battle, in which i receive many injuries. Eventually, by a lucky trip, i manage to knock him down. Taking the rock i have made my best friend and life saver, I hold it high above my head, revel for a moment in my victory, and then slam it down on my opponent, ensuring he will never rise again.
"Join me and we shall rule forever!!" Im sure those words arent true, but i know for a fact that they were the last spoken by The Beast of Snolore Hill's twin. I shout "NEVERRRRR" and charge, pouring all my remaining strengtth into one final charge. He parries my swing with his ax, and cuts the rock off of my rope, rending it useless. I slide to the ground, under his legs and come up behind him, no ready to admit defeat. With one mighty leap, I bound to the creatures back and with the remains of my tattered rope wrap it around his thick neck. I squeeze, until all the tendoms in my arm and neck are strained to their maximum capacity, and i feel as if every muscle is torn. The beast goes down, but continues to roll and swat at me, ax long lost down the hill. WE roll and roll for what seems like hours, until finally he can no longer breath, and he succumbs to my hold.
RRRRAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH i let out a bellow to all other Challengers. THIS IS MY HILL!! Even if you knock me down, i will continue to fight!
In the distance, i hear another shout, of congratulation from a fellow king, on a distant hill. "welcome back brother"he says, and i sit, resting for the first time in much to long.
ima jib that butter
R.I.P Poole, Steeger,McConkey,CRJ, Pierre, and Burke
You know your addicted to skiing when you wake up at 3 in the morning to fap and you end up on NS