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Drug test within this week

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Woodenshjips
Posts: 432 - Karma: 83

title says it all, i smoked recently this last sunday and i have a drug test coming up this week... so im pretty much fucked, do you have any suggestions or anything to get it out of my system ? also level 1s comming up this friday.. and i got alot of shit for that. so what should i do NS? thanks

Sep 6 2011 5:13PM
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SirShane
Posts: 199 - Karma: 17
Ask your friend that doesn't smoke for a cup of his pee but THC only stays in the body for three days so your all good.
Sep 6 2011 5:15PM
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cultrara
Posts: 5147 - Karma: 46,851
ive never understood why people continue to smoke when they think there might be a drug test in the future. 
Sep 6 2011 5:15PM
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Woodenshjips
Posts: 432 - Karma: 83
i just found out today by the sheriffs, i had no idea until today. if i did know i would have not smoked.
Sep 6 2011 5:18PM
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TheClap.
Posts: 21649 - Karma: 4,013
you
are
a
really
big
friggen
retard
like
legit
stupid
Sep 6 2011 5:22PM
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drumbumocdp
Posts: 3228 - Karma: 1,079
chances are you could literally not stop drinking water and be good. Or go to a head shop and buy a detox/shield thing. if you go with #2 make sure you follow the directions perfectly
Sep 6 2011 5:24PM
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drumbumocdp
Posts: 3228 - Karma: 1,079
and cranberry juice
Sep 6 2011 5:25PM
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Nobody.
Posts: 1193 - Karma: 471
I thought that was one of those things that you take the first letter of each word and they make a funny word.

But then I realized it said, Yaarbfrlls, and felt stupid.
Sep 6 2011 5:25PM
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F-Beezy
Posts: 365 - Karma: 86
 bullshit go to your local gnc and tell them you need a 48 hour detox drink that follow directions on bottle or drink lots of water the day of your test but also drink some cranberry juice for 2 reasons it also helps clean out your urinary tract and also will add color to your piss so it doesnt look like strait water drink around 2 gallons of water and a gallon of cranberry juice in the 6 hours or so before the test drink the cranberry juice in the hour and a half before the test good luck with it all both of these methods have worked for me multiple times
Sep 6 2011 5:26PM
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F-Beezy
Posts: 365 - Karma: 86
im serious do this but the drink is gonna cost u like 40+ bucks
Sep 6 2011 5:27PM
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WillStart
Posts: 3955 - Karma: 3,192
lololol.



thc generally stays in your system from anywhere from 5-30 days. It is highly unlikely that it would stay in your system that long, and that would only be if you have a very slow metabolism and you smoked HEAVILY before that, like most of the day every day I would think.

If you only smoke like once a week or so, then I wouldn't be too worried about it. THC is fat soluble (NOT water soluble), so exercise a bunch up until the test, drink water to help keep your system burn fat, etc. If you're still worried, buy a synthetic urine kit.


If you smoked multiple times a day every day, you might be in trouble, and a synthetic urine kit would probably be a very good purchase for you.


Sep 6 2011 5:28PM
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WillStart
Posts: 3955 - Karma: 3,192
Also, I personally wouldn't waste money on detox kits. Burning the fat the is the best, most reliable way to do it.


And don't pound down water and juice before a drug test. If your pee has too much water in it, the test result will be considered 'diluted' and you will have to retake it later to give a clearer result. Also, try to pee a couple times the day of the test before you have to take it. And don't immediately pee into the cup, only pee into it mid-stream.
Sep 6 2011 5:30PM
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Woodenshjips
Posts: 432 - Karma: 83
alright thanks, ill try to burn is much fat as possible.
Sep 6 2011 5:34PM
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F-Beezy
Posts: 365 - Karma: 86
as long u donmt over drink too much liquids the dilute test cant tell but oh yeah i did forget the working out best way is hit the gym or run man the more u sweat the better going along with what will said it is true if u only smoke like onceor twice it will go out alot faster therefore detox drink is a waste but if u smoke alot like a bunch then yeah detox drink will help out
Sep 6 2011 5:38PM
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WillStart
Posts: 3955 - Karma: 3,192
for sure. it really goes back to what i said about how much you've smoked. if you don't smoke THAT frequently, i wouldn't be super worried. i know a few kids who smoke daily and would get randomly drug tested at their job but still passed. not sure how that happened, but it did
Sep 6 2011 5:38PM
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SirShane
Posts: 199 - Karma: 17
No I'm not and trying telling the health book that not me.
Sep 6 2011 5:39PM
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Big.L
Posts: 703 - Karma: 15
Go to a health or drug store and ask for a flush kit whatever they are calling it, ask for the best one, if they give you one that comes with 4 pills, which is 2 separate doses you'll be good I had to get my brother one and it really worked
Sep 6 2011 5:46PM
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F-Beezy
Posts: 365 - Karma: 86
your health book must be from like 1950 yo your retarted
Sep 6 2011 5:50PM
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WillStart
Posts: 3955 - Karma: 3,192
detox kits are mostly a gimmick. i know people think they work, but how would anybody on ns really know?


most people are saying it because either they or a friend took one before a test and it worked, but that doesn't tell you anything. how do they know they weren't going to pass even without the kit? as i said, i've had friends who smoke everyday and have passed random drug tests. suppose they had found out about the test a day before and they had purchased a detox kit. they still would have passed, but that wouldn't show if the kit worked or not.

detox kits can't burn fat, and that's how thc leaves the system. a detox kit can't turn a positive result into a negative one.
Sep 6 2011 5:58PM
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[tk]
Posts: 3863 - Karma: 1,906
mods delete this
Sep 6 2011 6:09PM
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Deluge
Posts: 4398 - Karma: 767
WATER AND EXCERCISE are the best sorry for caps
Sep 6 2011 6:20PM
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soulskier
Posts: 17805 - Karma: 3,821
find every strain of every drug you can think of and consume the hell out of them. they wont think there's anyway the test results are true.
Sep 6 2011 6:42PM
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comeatmebro
Posts: 10720 - Karma: 66
sneak in pee.

it's usually pretty easy to do, most people administering the tests don't even pay attention in my experience.
Sep 6 2011 6:46PM
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AWALLRUS.
Posts: 5762 - Karma: 223
GET SOMEONE CLEAN TO PEE IN YOUR BUTT THEN USE THAT PEE
Sep 6 2011 6:49PM
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WillStart
Posts: 3955 - Karma: 3,192
actually when i took mine, they made me show them my empty pockets and shit. kind of depends on where you go, but that did happen to me at two different places. but it's really easy to tape a synthetic urine kit to the inside of your leg and bring it in that way.
Sep 6 2011 6:52PM
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comeatmebro
Posts: 10720 - Karma: 66
probably depends on who is administering the test and why you're getting tested. i get random tests for work and went in in the winter with a hoodie, jacket, jeans and everything and didn't even get as much as patted down lol. made me think REAL hard about taking up smoking again...unfortunately a real career is not something i can afford to risk...

but i'd say go in with someone elses urine or synthetic urine and put that shit in the cup...that's foolproof as long as you can get away with it. but still exercising/drinking water as well as taking one of the detox drinks as back up if for some reason your watched or whatever is your best best.
Sep 6 2011 7:04PM
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jabroni.
Posts: 662 - Karma: 235
i was GOING to go hard on this thread.. but everyone else has it covered!
Sep 6 2011 7:06PM
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WillStart
Posts: 3955 - Karma: 3,192
Yeah for sure. Both of mine were at drug testing facilities right next to LAX (LA airport), and that's where a lot of LAX employees go for random drug testing. so obviously they are pretty strict.
Sep 6 2011 7:13PM
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ryantheconnolly
Posts: 2027 - Karma: 108
youre not alone
Sep 6 2011 7:16PM
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ice_mike
Posts: 249 - Karma: 23
Just work out and try and sweat as much as you can, THC stores in the fat cells. So just drink a lot of water and cranberry juice, and work out and youll be set...or you can go with the detox kit
Sep 6 2011 7:17PM
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adamlukowski
Posts: 3676 - Karma: 311

So heres the deal. THC is usually out of your system in a day, however THC metabolite is the thing that stays and is tested for. The detox kits sometimes work, but it will only mask the THC metabolite for a certain window of time.

Excersise works, but you want to stop excersising 2 days before you're test, because the excersise gets the THC metabolite into you're blood.

Drinking water helps, but if you're just pissing clear it does nothing. The only time THC metabolite will be leaving you're body is if you're piss is yellow. However if you don't have time to get totally clean, you want to mask it. Drink few glasses of water and then when you piss yellow, drink somemore. by the second or 3rd piss it should be almost clear, but keep going a few times. Youll end up pissing clear, which is just water. Everytime you piss a little water make sure to drink a glass of water to refill..... and if you need the piss to be yellow, make sure to take a few Vitamin B complex, which will give you yellow piss.. hopefully that helps a little. 

Sep 6 2011 7:19PM
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WillStart
Posts: 3955 - Karma: 3,192
not a single person has yet explained how a detox kit can suddenly burn all the fat in your system that contains thc.

i would love to hear somebody attempt an explanation....
Sep 6 2011 7:20PM
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egg.
Posts: 3231 - Karma: 3,477
cranberry pills
Sep 6 2011 7:22PM
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General_Ripper
Posts: 3327 - Karma: 189
So, I recently went through this with a friend.

He failed a drug test because he drank too much water before hand like a retard. So they called him like a week later (of course he smoked again) and told him he needed to come back within like 3 hours and take another.

So I peed (I haven't smoke in 4 months) in a little cup for him that had a temperature sticker on the side. It is important that your piss is between 90-100 degrees when you give back the sample or else you fail. The way he fixed this was by rubber banding a hand warmer to the piss to get the right temp. Then he put on two pairs of tight boxer briefs and put the little bottle under his nuts.

Well long story short he passed.
Sep 6 2011 7:22PM
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pigglywiggly
Posts: 4482 - Karma: 305
wouldnt a hand warmer put it way higher than 100 degrees? i just throw the bottler under my nuts and its in between 90 and 100 that way.
Sep 6 2011 7:33PM
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egg.
Posts: 3231 - Karma: 3,477
^ haha cool
Sep 6 2011 7:33PM
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General_Ripper
Posts: 3327 - Karma: 189
nah hand warmer works perfect I guess. Well it did for him. You would have to keep the bottle under your nuts for a while and you would have to drive to the place with it under your nuts which would suck too
Sep 6 2011 7:52PM
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F-Beezy
Posts: 365 - Karma: 86
its easy go down to your local gas station buy 5 gallons of premium gasoline and drink it all within 24hrs and you will pass your drug test as simple as that
Sep 7 2011 6:08PM
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comeatmebro
Posts: 10720 - Karma: 66
make sure it is premium. even 91 octane will not work.
Sep 7 2011 6:13PM
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ironic
Posts: 735 - Karma: 104
But if he has to take it later, wouldn't that be a good thing? It would give him time to flush out his system.
Sep 7 2011 6:25PM
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kamron_708
Posts: 944 - Karma: 1,129
My friend had a drug test like 2 weeks ago, and he got fired because the pee sample was 100% room temperature tap water
Sep 7 2011 6:48PM
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ILLinoisance
Posts: 3527 - Karma: 5,398
1. find pouch like this:

Click for larger image

2. Clean out pouch.

3. Have sober friend get their urine into pouch.

4. Tape pouch to thigh to maintain body temperature.

5. Go to urine test.

6. Unload pouch into cup in bathroom.

7. Smile and give cup to person administering the test.

8. Pass urine test.

9. ????????????

9. Acquire copious amounts of the United States Dollar.
Sep 7 2011 7:34PM
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.JPolster
Posts: 782 - Karma: 17
Oil Change.
Sep 7 2011 7:54PM
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pigglywiggly
Posts: 4482 - Karma: 305
yeah, my school random drug and alcohol tests us so i put it in after i shower in the morning or right before i go in to school. They make you empty your pockets and everything so its either under the nuts or a no go. after about an hour or so it puts it up to 96 degrees. i did it with water one time and took a temp test after an hour and a half and it was 96. started off with just tap water temperature.
Sep 7 2011 8:30PM
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jibsta4
Posts: 49 - Karma: 17
i read in a diferent thread orange juice vitamin c pills all the vitamin c u can get helps alot.........
Sep 7 2011 8:44PM
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WillStart
Posts: 3955 - Karma: 3,192
Are you talking about the water or the detox?


detox won't do shit. water won't really do shit either. it helps in the sense that it keeps your body healthy so you can burn fat efficiently, and in the sense that it can dilute your urine on the day of the test. but you don't need much to dilute it, so pounding water all day the day before and day of the test will do nothing but dilute your urine enough to return a 'diluted' test result, which means he will have to retake the test. but in the end, nothing changes the fact that thc is stored in fat, and the only way to get rid of that thc is to burn fat. detox, cranberry juice, and water cant change that.
Sep 7 2011 9:26PM
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AWALLRUS.
Posts: 5762 - Karma: 223
IVE GOT AN IDEA! TAKE A WEE BIT OF EVERY SINGLE DRUG YOU CAN THINK OF, THAT WAY WHEN THEY GET YOUR RESULTS, IT'LL LOOK LIKE THEY FUCKED IT UP
Sep 7 2011 9:27PM
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[-mvee-]
Posts: 1713 - Karma: 10
reminds me of that one episode of workaholics..
Sep 7 2011 9:33PM
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Mister.F
Posts: 1206 - Karma: 169
BOOM
Sep 7 2011 9:36PM
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jibking1212
Posts: 807 - Karma: 50
Ive heard that mixing jello mix with water and drinking it helps. Apprently it doesnt taste good but it helped my friend pass. Ive never done it personally tho. Try it out and let me know how it works.
Sep 7 2011 9:40PM
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1337
Posts: 31038 - Karma: 29,003
hahahah laughed so hard at this

your friend is an idiot
Sep 7 2011 9:42PM
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