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July, 2025

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Mind bottling pooping question...

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R@ggaMuffin
Posts: 321 - Karma: 34
You guys know that half of guys wipe their ass standing after a good ol poo and the other half wipe sitting down, and almost no one realizes that the other method exists?
15 years ago
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Bar_Down
Posts: 5896 - Karma: 395
has this ever happened to any sitters out there? either your water level is way too high, or you have an abnormally large cock, or you're doing it wrong.
15 years ago
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smltownjibba
Posts: 246 - Karma: 7
all you standers just need to face the facts. your parents were wierd people who showed you how to do something wrong. If you are having a hard time wiping and checking paper while sitting down you are fat and you should go to the gym.
you probly piss sitting down too. no, that's not normal.
15 years ago
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Obi-Wan-Jenobi
Posts: 951 - Karma: 119

you guys have fat buts. I sit, poop, wipe, check, repeat last 2 steps until desired effect is achieved, then stand up and leave. No mid poop stand neccesary

15 years ago
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Bar_Down
Posts: 5896 - Karma: 395
i dont understand how everything is fine and dandy when you're sitting and shitting, but as soon as you try to wipe while sitting your cock suddenly decides to go for a drink
15 years ago
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hoodratz47
Posts: 12028 - Karma: 9,586
https://newschoolers.com/ns/forums/readthread/thread_id/273131/

those are classic threads.. as is this.

stand and wad....

unless theres only one sheet left and then i put my pointer finger through the sheet and scrape off the poo with my finger and then pull off the sheet taking the poo with it.. and then a good hand washing.
15 years ago
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Blake.P
Posts: 9894 - Karma: 3,590
what? you don't go through the front? the back seems like it would be uncomfortable and too much work. its not that hard to not get shit on your balls/gouch
15 years ago
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zues
Posts: 6434 - Karma: -5,330
i stand up.. and you're right - i had no idea you could wipe sitting down...

HOW THE FUCK DO YOU WIPE SITTING DOWN???
15 years ago
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B-runge
Posts: 16558 - Karma: 362
jokes?

that seems so difficult
15 years ago
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Sno.
Posts: 12311 - Karma: 7,890
I just asked my fiance and he said that he does the "buick hood ornament" which is apparently standing, with a slight bend at the knees, and the torso bent forward as if to retrieve the snap from the center.
15 years ago
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snowking249
Posts: 1452 - Karma: 34
This thread has made me realize so much
15 years ago
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,273
you wipe your ass too, what's your method?
15 years ago
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GayWolf420
Posts: 38303 - Karma: 132,194
GIRLS DON'T POOP THOUGH. ITS ALL LIES.
15 years ago
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C-Burg
Posts: 4729 - Karma: 130
I do the third option
15 years ago
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theline
Posts: 1507 - Karma: 92
i like how this topic emerges in every online forum eventually
15 years ago
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Master_Debater
Posts: 1211 - Karma: 225
im going to drop some knowledge right here:
both methods are fine but sitting can be a health risk if you wipe back to front because some of your "sin" can get close enough to your junk to where bacteria can crawl up in dat penis and give you diseases and such
15 years ago
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Dylan_
Posts: 9828 - Karma: 1,409
used to be a stander now im a sitter
15 years ago
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saucybiscuits
Posts: 2554 - Karma: 173
as amazing as this may sound............... this is a repost.
15 years ago
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statuswhitegirl
Posts: 4058 - Karma: 884
im a stander and i wipe it on the shower curtain because its not as dry feeling





Click for larger image
15 years ago
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Jamestown
Posts: 4002 - Karma: 51
I lay down on my back when I'm done and put my legs up over my head, then wipe. Who the fuck remains seated or stands up? Am I right, or am I right?
15 years ago
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alexg1687
Posts: 1505 - Karma: 1,582
no one has realised this is a joke. OP just wants you to try it standing up so you make a huge mess of yourself. people do it sitting down for a reason..
15 years ago
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.frenchy
Posts: 18232 - Karma: 12,420

Sitting down ftw.

boggling?*

15 years ago
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Lemuel
Posts: 14544 - Karma: 11,158
Yaa wtf, who stands up?
15 years ago
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GeneralT
Posts: 912 - Karma: 19
sitter. my friend has a toliet that has a heated seat and sprays water on your butt when your down. its soo nice.
15 years ago
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k-rob
Posts: 14217 - Karma: 2,897
well that movie sucked, so everyone who heard it sucked after everyone else saw it, didn't watch it.
15 years ago
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Bar_Down
Posts: 5896 - Karma: 395
yes. thats the reason why i do it
15 years ago
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alexg1687
Posts: 1505 - Karma: 1,582
ill keep that in mind incase i ever feel the sudden urge to get a sex change
15 years ago
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Davy.Crockett
Posts: 5373 - Karma: 324
..
15 years ago
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Lemuel
Posts: 14544 - Karma: 11,158
I just decided to read the thread after I posted, and wow has it been a while since I laughed so much. Seriously, wiping from the front? Standing up? Broken toilet seats? I don't even....
15 years ago
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cwillygood
Posts: 6831 - Karma: 1,829
sitter for sure
15 years ago
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Bar_Down
Posts: 5896 - Karma: 395
this sentence made me lol
15 years ago
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Stickity
Posts: 7750 - Karma: 769
but it accommodates my excessive laziness
15 years ago
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eheath
Posts: 61974 - Karma: 126,944
I sit, if you stand it squishes the poop together, making the mess worse.
15 years ago
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Wall_Nut
Posts: 629 - Karma: 113
Tell me, big Papa, what is Sitting on a Dick like?
15 years ago
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Bart.Man
Posts: 1742 - Karma: 1,953
Honestly? Do none of you get the reference?!?
15 years ago
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uosdwiSrjewoH
Posts: 4220 - Karma: 122
very few pinknames in this thread...
15 years ago
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BenWest
Posts: 470 - Karma: 89
LMAO, yeah i honestly had no idea that people stood up to wipe... blew my mind. far more interesting than anything I learned in class today
15 years ago
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alexg1687
Posts: 1505 - Karma: 1,582
upon much deliberation i've realised standing up to wipe doesn't work...there's nowhere to put your laptop
15 years ago
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muFFn
Posts: 1040 - Karma: 74
A better question to ask is which way do you wipe? Front to back? Or back to front?
15 years ago
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ryantheconnolly
Posts: 2027 - Karma: 108
id say the reason we dont know the other method exists is because people dont discuss their pooping experiences as often as they should
15 years ago
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Pool.
Posts: 2820 - Karma: 662
my freind has a washlet in every bathroom at his house, i take a dump there every time i go over, its like pooping in a cloud, the seats warm, dont have to wipe, its deotorized, literally its the shit (pun intended)
15 years ago
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popNfresh44
Posts: 3757 - Karma: 44
All the people that stand up are probably the same people that perpetually smell like ass. You would have to bend over and separate your cheeks like you're about to get fucked from the rear to avoid getting shit all over your cheeks. As said before, your parents are just weird and probably did it as a cruel joke when they potty trained you. I don't see how some of you find it hard to check the paper while sitting down. I have been doing it since I was potty trained, and I have never gotten shit on myself once in my life. The toilet seat is designed to spread your ass to an optimal position so that your sphincter is accessible and not dangerously close to your surrounding ass skin. You are supposed to wipe sitting down!
15 years ago
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B-runge
Posts: 16558 - Karma: 362
hell yeah poop&fresh knows whats up
15 years ago
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Alex-NZ
Posts: 30 - Karma: 10
haha sums up my thoughts exactly.

I can just imagine now how retarded someone would look standing up. It's all about the lean to the side, I haven't broken my toilet seat yet.

But wiping from the front, that's gotta be a joke right?
15 years ago
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Hemulen.
Posts: 448 - Karma: 17
.
15 years ago
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.seb.
Posts: 1291 - Karma: 597
who would stand?
15 years ago
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pmills
Posts: 7162 - Karma: 59
you say that like it's a bad thing
15 years ago
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I_Am_Mod
Posts: 13214 - Karma: 3,753
has anyone ever pooped underwater ?

you should definately try it next time you go swimming!
15 years ago
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alexg1687
Posts: 1505 - Karma: 1,582
no, but a friend told me a while ago that one of the greatest feelings in the world is pissing the bed...told me to do it on the last night at my next stay at a hotel. said it would be really satisfying, like you're a kid again or something. i have yet to try it...dont know if i want to
15 years ago
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carbon.pulse
Posts: 3348 - Karma: 23
I thnk the big question is proper pooping technique. You have to land on one cheek then pull the other across pretty hard so that minimal ass is exposed to poops.

Personaly I am a stander as, when proper poooping technique is used one or two wipes will usually suffice but with the runs or as they may be referred to as "the never ending story" extra stretch may be needed post poop to ensure that the magority of poop is extracted. But I will definatley try and figure out this sitting down poop technique and give a full trip report tomorrow.
15 years ago
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ReignMan
Posts: 1852 - Karma: 226
Dose anyone have the problem of shit dipping in to the toilet water. shit being not shit but penis.
15 years ago
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