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In-class-farts

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derbski
Posts: 3173 - Karma: 62
I am in my calc 3 discussion class, and I have a real seat-cracker building up in me, the kind that makes you move around cause it is so uncomfortable to hold in. The problem is thatI already showed up like 5 minutes late for this, and can't exactly get up to go to the bathroom
This puppy will be neither silent nor smell-less, and I still have like 35 minutes of class. Shit sucks man, feel free to talk about your inopportune farts as you see necessary
Nov 9 2010 12:13PM
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WaterBottle
Posts: 1156 - Karma: 4
i always fart when i pee so its awkward for me in bathrooms
Nov 9 2010 9:27PM
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the.cheat
Posts: 2859 - Karma: 171
fantastic thread. anyways, i was at camp with some friends and there was some ceremony where everyones in the woods like blindfolded and it was pretty quiet, so as they were conducting this blindfolded ceremony, i ripped major ass. everyone started cracking up but trying to conceal it. and nobody knew who it was cause we were all blindfolded.
Nov 9 2010 9:31PM
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hoodratz47
Posts: 11992 - Karma: 9,212

in high school in a math test... my good buddy sittin in front of me.. let out a fuckin tear ass fart.. and turned and yelled JIM!!!!!!.. so fuckin funny....

one time in meterology my buddy toby farted and ns i can say it was the smelliest fart of all time.. ...

and i just farted soo long at work.. smelly as fuck!

Nov 9 2010 9:34PM
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Charlie_Kelly
Posts: 11953 - Karma: 12,292
haha. you sir made me laugh
Nov 9 2010 9:36PM
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J..H
Posts: 646 - Karma: 73
hahahahha thats fucking great
Nov 9 2010 9:39PM
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bluedevil493
Posts: 233 - Karma: 27
Click for larger image
Nov 9 2010 9:40PM
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StReEtPIRATES
Posts: 1378 - Karma: 135
I leterally just started crying thats so funny
Nov 9 2010 9:56PM
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tripnip
Posts: 1882 - Karma: 482
so a few weeks ago i went off with some friend to go get a burrito and freshman cant go off but what ever so on the way back to school (walking) our security gaurd caught us usualy we give him chips and he goes away but we ate them all so he sent us too the office and it was me and two other kids sitting in the VP's office, and we just ate some serious burritos so pressure started to build and build so me and this other kid let it rip. give it about 2 minuets to stink up the room and the VP walks in he sits down, gets a sour look on his face and says thanks for soiling my office two hours of ISS... there is somthing to learn from this. dont get caught.
Nov 9 2010 10:12PM
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Sheets-mmm
Posts: 392 - Karma: 42
i recommend what i call a power fart. especailly in math class, you need something to make it better..next time you have to fart let it build up inside you, take a deep breath and then push out the loudest fart you can possibly push out. i dont recommend this if the chance of sharting is in question
Nov 9 2010 10:32PM
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pmsnow
Posts: 992 - Karma: 87
I haven't laughed this hard in a while. Good thread. The only story I have was from my junior year. I was sitting in the back of one of my classes and felt a fart coming on. This wasn't a big deal because I felt that I had mastered the whole clinching of the butt cheeks and letting it out slow to avoid the loud noise. So i slowly let it out with great success in concealing the noise. About 30 seconds later, the class was evacuating the room because apparently I had misjudged the scent that was going to be released. It made me want to throw up it was so foul smelling.
Nov 9 2010 10:45PM
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Mr.Gaga
Posts: 2021 - Karma: 542
ahah i remember getting punished for farting in class
Nov 9 2010 10:47PM
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Alehandro
Posts: 818 - Karma: 12
ive seriously laughed about 15 times
Nov 10 2010 2:36AM
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JayDope
Posts: 6842 - Karma: 408
i want to sig so many of these stories, its almost 3am here, and i can now sleep and laugh about farts in my dreams, thank u all!
Nov 10 2010 2:55AM
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jibberwookie22
Posts: 102 - Karma: 166
haha thats exactly like my class we had a huge presentation i just ripped ass but the teacher was piised cuz i couldnt help but laugh
Nov 10 2010 9:42AM
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BROSEIDON
Posts: 3702 - Karma: 1,495
so many lol's
Nov 10 2010 1:01PM
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brody
Posts: 1452 - Karma: 12
holy shit farting never gets old
my favourite was in gym class with the best teacher, but he didn't take shit form no one. The entire class was sitting listening to him talk about sports. Felt the fart coming on, figured i could slip one out silently, but next thing you know the sound of a basketball shoe dragging itself across the floor escaped from my ass. The look on his face said it all and i burst out laughing before dipping!


Nov 10 2010 4:21PM
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toominator
Posts: 4792 - Karma: 120
You violated their airspace!
Nov 10 2010 5:09PM
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J.Braun
Posts: 585 - Karma: 20
tiiight
Nov 10 2010 5:13PM
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gcobs123
Posts: 105 - Karma: 10
Rippin ass in class while typing this, Now blaming it on the kid next to me
Nov 12 2010 12:55PM
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E.C.
Posts: 3211 - Karma: 319
i have lol'd at most posts. 2 pages of quality
Nov 12 2010 1:00PM
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dbricknasty
Posts: 387 - Karma: 9
senior year prom, last dance, let out this nasty ass fart. all my friends around me moved like 15 feet away, my date started to gag, all i could do was laugh. ahh good times.
Nov 12 2010 2:41PM
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gcobs123
Posts: 105 - Karma: 10
That is possibly the funniest thing i have ever heard
Nov 12 2010 3:47PM
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Spinoza
Posts: 12763 - Karma: 3,844
my friend is in 'child and youth studies' so he's the only guy in some of his lectures. well someone other than him farted in his class last week. girl farts = nasty, especially when you have to smell them
Nov 12 2010 3:54PM
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AHSkier
Posts: 563 - Karma: 42
In class farts are the shit (no pun intended)
Nov 12 2010 3:56PM
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Stickity
Posts: 7750 - Karma: 769
honors spanish 2
i was sitting in the back of the class
feet up on the seat hugging my knees in the fetal position
it slipped out
my butthole must have been extraordinarily tight from this position because it was fucking loud and high pitched
the teacher stopped talking
everyone stared
i didn't move
the teacher started talking again
Nov 21 2010 12:40AM
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BenWhit
Posts: 4654 - Karma: 3,256
so this one's not in class, but it was one of the raunchiest farts ever...

we're sitting around in my room playing "fuck your liver" (hate it), and i'm at the point where i'm fairly intoxicated and have a nice beer baby in my stomach. having eaten a buffalo chicken burrito and an awful dinner of fried foods, i could feel the gas building in my intestines, my sphincter working perilously to keep this fart inside me. i decided i could no longer bear the pressure and let this bad boy sneak out. it was god awful. i don;t know if its stench was masked by the smell of beer and cheap vodka in my room, or if people smelt it, knew who dealt it, but disregarded it anyway. i honestly thought i was gonna die from the smell. it was like i had a dead skunk in my ass.
Nov 21 2010 2:56PM
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BrewskiJr
Posts: 5738 - Karma: 1,478
I was sitting in the library back in high school and there was the two hottest girls in my class two tables across from me. They were just dickin around talking and what not when one girl let up a big fart. They got silent and looked around to see if anyone noticed to see me with the most shocked, disappointed, sad, disgusted face. They started apologizing and I started laughing my ass off.

Needless to say, she wasn't the hottest girl in my senior class for long.
Nov 21 2010 3:08PM
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wvvalleygirl
Posts: 7 - Karma: 10
Haha, every time I do that people just think it was whatever guy is sitting near me.
Nov 21 2010 3:44PM
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Toasty.
Posts: 6195 - Karma: 2,278

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d7hzcLZ7uRc

not sure if it worked cause i suck. but it has something to do with farting.

Nov 21 2010 3:57PM
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derbski
Posts: 3173 - Karma: 62
ride on for the female farting, and for the nipping out on your profile pic...... just sayin......
Nov 24 2010 3:21AM
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th3Mailman
Posts: 222 - Karma: 18
so stoked this thread is back.
Nov 24 2010 3:25AM
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B-runge
Posts: 16558 - Karma: 360
i lold so hard at this
Nov 24 2010 3:31AM
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.Annydrew.
Posts: 749 - Karma: 38
I was in fitness and we were doing sit ups, i could feel one brewing so I had to stop, but the teacher who was holding my feet down made me do them faster, a little one went off but was ok, so i carried on and boom, a massive ripper come out, the whole hall could hear it, 40 people, so embarrassing, so i turned around and just layed on my stomach with my hands covering my face, this was only like 3 weeks ago as well haha..
Nov 24 2010 5:41AM
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myanklezrbroken
Posts: 765 - Karma: 20
so the night before harry potter we went to white castle, me and my friends had the munchies so we got the case of thirty andi had ten hamburgers + fries+pop+trolli gummie worms+rebull, within like 20 mins. then we saw they movie and the next morning at school i had the worst smeeling farts you could ever smeel. there the ones that smell like peppers there so strong. anyways i was letting them off in school and you could tell where it traveled around the school because people were putting there shirts over there noses. by the end of the day they found out it was me.
Nov 24 2010 11:02AM
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E.C.
Posts: 3211 - Karma: 319
could have been a perfect plan
Nov 24 2010 11:05AM
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theline
Posts: 1507 - Karma: 92
yeah... ya gotta wonder if that is actually a genuine picture of the user
Nov 24 2010 11:24AM
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thebeesknees
Posts: 3660 - Karma: 160
I farted all the time in like 4th grade. they called me fart boy.
Nov 24 2010 12:57PM
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whoa-dere
Posts: 10596 - Karma: 7,100
i am known by my friends as "the mexican" because i like to eat burritos and fart around school. hot farts are the best.
Oct 1 2011 11:55PM
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stupendous-man
Posts: 8637 - Karma: 13,293
such gold in here. lets get this started again!
Oct 2 2011 12:35AM
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theabortionator
Posts: 51260 - Karma: 157,386
.
Oct 2 2011 12:36AM
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RZcrew
Posts: 366 - Karma: 2,209
i hate when ur on a tramp and have to fart and when u bounce it just shoots out no matter what
Oct 2 2011 12:50AM
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Guard_Puma
Posts: 344 - Karma: 82
hahaha +k for having 7 posts in a year, and one of them is in a farting thread.

In elementary school, I would frequently get the teacher asking quietly in my ear if I needed to "take a walk", and then I'd have to go out in the hallway for a few minutes cuz I'd fart so much in class. I'm 20 now it this is all so hilarious. I predict that farting will be one of the most hilarious things ever until the day I die. Thread of GOLD right here.
Oct 2 2011 12:55AM
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elemeno89
Posts: 1582 - Karma: 79
freshman year of high school i was sitting next to an upper classman in biology. we were taking a test one day and the fucker let a huge one rip in the middle of it and everyone starts cracking up, and the dude played it off like i did it. didnt help that it stunk to high heaven...
Oct 2 2011 2:14AM
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smeeze
Posts: 879 - Karma: 126
lol yes^^
Oct 2 2011 2:29AM
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Orrin
Posts: 1757 - Karma: 1,114
When I was sitting my Biology exam last year it was completely silence and this one guy couldn't stop sneezing. It was funny in the first place that he was constantly sneezing...So just as his final sneeze of a major 5 sneezes in a row combo was ending, this guy's bowels just exploded with noise and every single person in the room looked up from their papers and began laughing their asses off. Even the invigilators were smiling for a few seconds. It was magical.

Farts <3
Oct 2 2011 6:34AM
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k-fred
Posts: 5363 - Karma: 1,598

you get it lololol

thats how shits are done

Oct 2 2011 7:24AM
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