my parents made me go to some horse thing i have no idea why neither of them like horses it was like a comity and the guest speaker said "im so hairy to be here" the funny part was that he must of been looking at someone in the crowd and said the wrong thing me and my mom still laugh about it and its been almost a year.
I was in science a few years ago and this kid was giving a speech on Portuguese Manawars or wtvr. He was like, " So when they get older, they loose the testicles." Everyone laughed...still do to this day.
There was this really nice girl Jaime who was running for class president last year. She was talking about how she was friends with a lot of people and how she knows everyone, which was kind of true. So in the midst of making her point...she says this
"You know, I know a lot of you....I get around."
followed by one concealed snort/laugh.
followed by everyone laughing at her.
I Ski At Plattekill, Belleayre, and Sugarbush
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.
big dude in my bio class was high as fuck doing a power point presentation in front of the class, and he couldnt control his hands, skipped trhough 12 of 15 slides, and all he said that anyone understood was, "well, bescially it gives/means you have small balls", i think it was klinefelters or something like that, the class couldnt stop fucking laughing.
in second grade, we read this book called "There's a hole in the Dike." The kid reading it couldn't really spell, so he kept saying "There's a hole in the dick."
Also, my football coach was talking to us at half time and he says "Everyone thinks we have a chink on our team"........dead silence due to the fact that there was ONE asian kid on the team. He goes on to say "Uhhhh, I mean, a chink in our armor." I had to try incredibly hard to stifle my laughter.
Do you have any idea what would happen to paper if you put it in a furnace? you would RUIN it!
The first time I ever got drunk was with a couple friends, and we woke up with epic hangovers the next morning........ when asked if he was still drunk and/or ok to drive, my buddy screams "I AM SO NOT SOBER......................................... FUCK!!!!"