I laughed so hard at some of the threads
I keep hearing about "fantasy football," and since I can't be bothered to do any research whatsoever, I'm going to assume it involves sexually fantasizing about football players. Gentlemen, football is gay enough. Men chase other men around, force them down to the ground, and lay on top of them. Some of the sport's key words are "touch," "down," and "sack." The game features players called "wide receivers" and "tight ends." Hiking the ball requires one player to luridly bend over in front of another player. There's also a lot of fanny-patting and huddling. And that's just what takes place on the field. Lord knows what goes on in the locker rooms.
Don't join a fantasy football league and add to the gayness, guys. Now, I admit that some of the players have pleasing physiques and dreamy eyes. In the 60s and 70s, I had strange feelings for Joe Namath.
I prayed to God Almighty for strength, and the result is the spiritual luminary before you today. So quit fantasizing about football players. Let the Bible be your moral compass. And if you're still experiencing unnatural yearnings, think about baseball.
