last night an unexpected man with a massive reproductive organ slammed into the midwest area. there were massive casualties. most deaths were caused by white substance suffication.  40 story buildings were knocked over as the man swung from side to side. there was an oil well that was violated by the man. word is he pulled his pants down, ripped off the rigging for oil, and crammed his junk into the oil hole. he thrusted up and down with total disregard for plate techtonics. his thrusting caused earthquakes that could be felt all the way to san fransisco. his boner has to be stopped and the only way is with the help of all you newschooler bitches.
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