When we were 5, My neighbor told me he would give me candy if he could touch my butt. I dropped my pants. Just as the kid was about to violate me, my grandma walked around the corner of the house and chased him away. The end.

When I devoured my twin brother in the womb

SupremeDeityWhen I devoured my twin brother in the womb

I dont remember too much of it but SFB was there and I was really sore the next day

Playing n64 and watching good nickolodeon/cartoon network

anal penetration from michael jackson. when he was black (;

Holzsteezy*anal penetration from michael jackson. when he was black (;

Thats the best kind of memory

when my gf gave me a hj at 12

Walk off grandslam to win the district tournament of the little league all star tourney.

playing kill-the-pill, or football before class in 4th and 5th grade on frost covered grass.

veng_mwhen my gf gave me a hj at 12

I tag teamed a girl with this one kid when I was 12

veng_mwhen my gf gave me a hj at 12

bj* sorry

The only time my dad hugged me

When OP and I went to a football training camp hosted by Jerry Sandusky. We both did very well and Jerry invited us to his house for 1 on 1 training. We both agreed to go but my Mom wouldnt let me. OP still went though. Come to think of it I didnt see OP much after that and when i did he had a limp.

El_Barto.When OP and I went to a football training camp hosted by Jerry Sandusky. We both did very well and Jerry invited us to his house for 1 on 1 training. We both agreed to go but my Mom wouldnt let me. OP still went though. Come to think of it I didnt see OP much after that and when i did he had a limp.

I remember that... Good Times

I was only 9 years old I loved shrek so much, I had all the merchandise and movies

I pray to shrek every night before bed thanking him for the life I've been given.

Shrek is love I say, Shrek is life

My dad overhears me and calls me a faggot

I knew he was just jealous of my devotion for Shrek

I called him a cunt

He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep

Im crying now, and my face hurts

I lay in bed and its really cold

A warmth is moving towards me.

I feel something touch me

Its shrek

I am so happy

He whispers in to ear "this is my swamp

He grabs me with his powerful ogre hands and puts me on my hands and knees

I'm ready

I spread my ass cheeks for Shrek

He penetrates my butthole

It hurts so much but I do it for Shrek

I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water

I push against his force

I want to please Shrek

He roars a mighty roar as he fills my butt with his love

My dad walks in

Shrek looks him straight in the eye and says "Its all ogre now"

Shrek leaves through my window

Shrek is love, Shrek is life

we renovated our house back in florida and we added a second floor and when they were putting it in, we had this golden retriever and he went up the stairs before they actually put the flooring down, so he stepped onto the drywall and just fell through the ceiling. he wasn't hurt..just shocked.

i was playing with beanie babies with my cousin once and got so immersed in it i forgot to go poop, i ended up getting constipated for about a week. I was at my aunts house when i finally got it all out, she rewarded me by letting me play mario kart on the game cube, which was a really big deal

dingusWassup NS, what are some memories from your childhood that really stick out, good or bad, funny or serious. I search barred and didn't see anything like this but forgive me if it is a repost.

My strangest childhood memory was when I took a shit in a school sink when I was in the second grade, and then the janitor walked in mid shit. I was so mortified but I had to, I was triple dog dared, I got away clean because I was dared, also because I was a bit of a teachers pet and the only white kid in the school.

Also the time I was touched by an Ewok

you were NOT in Ewok Adventure!

I think my last night with my daddy was fun but my anus bled so much I blacked out and woke up in the er with a 8 inch plug lodged in my rectum

Someone snatched me at the mall when I was 4, my mom chased the lady down and roughed her up pretty good. Hell yeah Carly thanks for not letting me be kidnapped.

Star Wars Battlefront 2

Power Rangers was the shit for me, I had the red ranger pajamas and used to beat the shit out of random things expecting sparks to fly out of stuff.

I also got married to a girl in 4th grade, my friend Joey officiated the ceremony. There were some real sparks there, too bad it wasn't an open bar.

I also remember the reoccurring theme of being with friends and arguing over what to do. Saying stuff like "hey I'm the guest so I don't have to pick what we do" and "What do you wanna do? I don't know, what do you wanna do?"

But hands down the best memory I have of my childhood is being in the backyard with my brother and my dad, working on different projects like ramps and making wooden swords, Dad would always be playing Tom Petty. Thats where I learned from my dad how to be a man and different life lessons.

Falling off the lift and breaking my leg, and my nose.

loomisStar Wars Battlefront 2

That was the shit, I'm stoked on my childhood being revived with the new one coming out

Most of my fondest childhood memories were from going to work with my dad...which mostly consisted of sitting in a truck without air conditioning and driving around to different well sites

Almost always with some hunting, fishing, or hiking mixed in

Even got to hit the explode button once when they were doing some fracking

There was this really annoying kid in the neighborhood who we all hated. Well we would occasionally play manhunt throughout the neighborhood and this time me and my brother were going to play with this kid. We told him to hide first, he hid, we went inside. Looking back it was a shitty thing to do, but it's still funny. Never really talked to him again, no idea how long he stayed out hiding for.

A 5-6 years later he tried to fight me at some city event when all the kids were playing a pickup game of football. I like to think it was because of that day.

Probably my earliest memories like going to my babysitters and singing "Higher" by Creed because that was my childhood jam