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March, 2024

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Ski Jokes

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Most-D
Posts: 729 - Karma: 1,088
NS,

I need your best ski-related jokes or puns.

Thanks!
May 5 2011 5:30PM
16 5
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Powderhauser
Posts: 546 - Karma: 38
^ got that from my friend
May 8 2011 10:18PM
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SauceHelmet
Posts: 48 - Karma: 14
Three guys travel to a ski lodge. All the rooms are booked so they have to sleep on the same bed. Next morning, one guy wakes up saying that he got a handjob. The guy on the other side also had the same dream. The guy who slept in the middle had a dream he was skiing.
May 8 2011 11:12PM
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Ski.Ballet
Posts: 2860 - Karma: 200
hahahahahaha
May 8 2011 11:17PM
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jon@wh2o
Posts: 314 - Karma: 158
How many mountain guides does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Only one. He just stands there and the world revolves around him.
May 9 2011 1:53AM
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Powderhauser
Posts: 546 - Karma: 38

how does a skier screw in a lightbulb

by stomping a cork 7

yes i know its bad

May 9 2011 2:36AM
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Mr_pretzel
Posts: 4616 - Karma: 1,289
threads.
May 9 2011 3:06AM
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Will.T
Posts: 3453 - Karma: 1,279
hahahaha, this is the better !
May 9 2011 6:53AM
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Kimbo~Slice
Posts: 522 - Karma: 194
How do you stop a baby drowning?

Take your foot of it's head.
May 9 2011 7:15AM
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.jersey
Posts: 1925 - Karma: 9
uh, that doesn't have to do anything with skiing.
May 9 2011 8:55AM
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Powderhauser
Posts: 546 - Karma: 38
aint a ski joke but i laugh everytime

Props to my friend Hermann

Click for larger image
May 10 2011 2:21PM
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luc
Posts: 1000 - Karma: 607
threadz
May 10 2011 3:03PM
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Toby.Dickson
Posts: 317 - Karma: 679
hahahahahhahahah love this
May 11 2011 2:48AM
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RIP_leos_shack
Posts: 710 - Karma: 3,201
How many NSers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

1 to start the thread and 30 more to say threads until it gets screwed.
May 12 2011 10:36AM
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Mike-O
Posts: 14593 - Karma: 1,089
This is great!
May 12 2011 10:39AM
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LukeTvich
Posts: 567 - Karma: 30
Why don't NSers ski bumps? Cause they do enough bumps when they get home
May 12 2011 1:05PM
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LukeTvich
Posts: 567 - Karma: 30
What's the difference between Obama and Olympic Moguls? Obama wants change
May 12 2011 1:07PM
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gabe_cohen
Posts: 193 - Karma: 250
this is some funny shit
May 12 2011 1:08PM
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LukeTvich
Posts: 567 - Karma: 30
What's tighter than Shaun white? His pants
May 12 2011 1:16PM
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.Midwest
Posts: 493 - Karma: 22
If you french fry when you should be pizzaing, you're going to have a bad day.

Not so much a joke, but I've always thought it was funny.
May 12 2011 3:48PM
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Most-D
Posts: 729 - Karma: 1,088
This really is great!
May 13 2011 2:58PM
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whoa-dere
Posts: 10596 - Karma: 7,100
revolver

ok, the following joke was not invented by me, i don't hate on jon, but its kinda funny
where did jon's right ski go?
it dissapeared into ahmet's ass
May 15 2011 8:53PM
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jibmeisterflex
Posts: 719 - Karma: 63
there shold be more black skiers they like to grab blunt
May 15 2011 9:06PM
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boozer
Posts: 518 - Karma: 35,578
SNOWBOARDERS SHOULD HAVE ALL THE SAME RIGHTS SKIERS DO
May 15 2011 9:37PM
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Inline.
Posts: 4424 - Karma: 432
thredzz
May 15 2011 10:42PM
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c4t_l0ver
Posts: 5485 - Karma: 810
lol, wut
May 15 2011 10:55PM
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J.DUKE
Posts: 1233 - Karma: 38
whats the best thing about a ski racer






nothing
May 15 2011 11:59PM
1 0
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cool_name
Posts: 4295 - Karma: 3,131
and  5 to say re post
May 17 2011 1:29AM
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B-Phelps
Posts: 125 - Karma: 14

What's the difference between a snowboard and a vaccume cleaner?

How you attach the dirtbag.

May 17 2011 3:56AM
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dobski
Posts: 44 - Karma: 18
Whats the difference between a Ski school snake and a real snake?

With a real snake the asshole's at the end
May 17 2011 6:29AM
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