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March, 2024

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I have a black eye.

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Carl_the_Llama
Posts: 504 - Karma: 1,295
Ok. Here's the story.

I am gonna have a beauty black eye in a little while, and so in preparation for all the " what happened to your eye!!!11!" questions, I'm looking for good explanations and/or excuses.

And yes, the actual way it happened is really lame.

I'm expecting big things NS!... Well no not really, but give it a shot...
Apr 30 2015 7:06PM
90 23
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supercooladin
Posts: 197 - Karma: 944
"I got slapped in the face by a cock when giving head to my cousin"
Apr 30 2015 7:11PM
28 0
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,270
"i got slapped in the face with a cock while giving head to my dad"
Apr 30 2015 7:15PM
7 5
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Big_Spence
Posts: 16177 - Karma: 4,352
"i got slapped in the face with a cock while giving head to my dog"
Apr 30 2015 7:27PM
8 2
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fresh_prince
Posts: 993 - Karma: 11,910
I got slapped in the face with my cock trying to give myself head
Apr 30 2015 7:59PM
9 1
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.FRY.
Posts: 5620 - Karma: 22,852
I got slapped in the face with a cock while trying to give my sister head
Apr 30 2015 8:01PM
13 0
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fresh_prince
Posts: 993 - Karma: 11,910
*purple dragon
An act in which you slap soneone in the face with your wang leaving a sometimes purple welt, hence "purple dragon."
"I once was at this party and recieved a purple dragon, it was brutal!"
Apr 30 2015 8:09PM
0 6
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Slush
Posts: 1905 - Karma: 12,901
I fell into a wood chipper
Apr 30 2015 8:28PM
3 2
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RICK_ROSS
Posts: 6983 - Karma: 3,342
i got slapped in the face with my cock while giving head to myself
Apr 30 2015 10:23PM
0 4
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Titus69
Posts: 9327 - Karma: 17,742
RICK_ROSSi got slapped in the face with my cock while giving head to myself


Lets be real OPs dick isnt big enough for that.
Apr 30 2015 10:38PM
2 1
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Lus146
Posts: 422 - Karma: 2,283
no_steeze"i got slapped in the face with a cock while giving head to my dad"


Whoa dude that's fucking gross. Save it for your cousin
Apr 30 2015 10:40PM
0 0
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.CJ.
Posts: 1507 - Karma: 3,657
You got slapped in the face by a cock when giving head to your teacher so he would give you a passing grade.
Apr 30 2015 10:41PM
1 1
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soulskier
Posts: 17805 - Karma: 3,821
How did you really geto it?
Apr 30 2015 10:45PM
0 0
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Carl_the_Llama
Posts: 504 - Karma: 1,295
soulskierHow did you really geto it?


I got slapped in the face by a cock when giving head to my cousin...
Apr 30 2015 11:01PM
3 0
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robbinJAHood
Posts: 1202 - Karma: 3,075
Spongebob reference of getting hit in the eye with a toothpaste cap
Apr 30 2015 11:02PM
3 0
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dingus
Posts: 1328 - Karma: 7,877
I got slapped in the face by a cock at Mexican Cock Fight
Apr 30 2015 11:36PM
0 0
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,270
Lus146Whoa dude that's fucking gross. Save it for your cousin


Is that cool? Is that cool?

https://www.newschoolers.com/videos/watch/769004/East-Bound-and-Down---Stevie--39-s-Dark-Secret
May 1 2015 12:01AM
0 0
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theabortionator
Posts: 51263 - Karma: 157,455
Make something new up each time someone asks you. When I worked at cranmore I fucked my should up bad and had it in a sling in my coat. Told the kids a shark took it off just below the should while I was scuba diving a few years before.

I think I told somebody else a bear got it. After the surgeries someone saw my scar while I was walking around shirtless and said tht somebody had a knife to my throat trying to rob me and I fucked them up but they sliced me pretty good with the knife.

Idk, just make up whatever. WHo cares. Or just tell them what happened.
May 1 2015 12:15AM
1 0
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PeppermillReno
Posts: 4751 - Karma: -564
Opening a champagne bottle.
May 1 2015 12:47AM
0 0
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shin-bang
Posts: 4100 - Karma: 6,992
theabortionatorMake something new up each time someone asks you. When I worked at cranmore I fucked my should up bad and had it in a sling in my coat. Told the kids a shark took it off just below the should while I was scuba diving a few years before.

I think I told somebody else a bear got it. After the surgeries someone saw my scar while I was walking around shirtless and said tht somebody had a knife to my throat trying to rob me and I fucked them up but they sliced me pretty good with the knife.

Idk, just make up whatever. WHo cares. Or just tell them what happened.


Op do this. Always listen to borty
May 1 2015 12:54AM
0 0
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selfiejesus
Posts: 345 - Karma: 1,808
"I can't tell you, they'll come after me again"
May 1 2015 1:14AM
5 0
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jensen
Posts: 2575 - Karma: 1,250
Just say, "What black eye?" repeatedly
May 1 2015 12:21PM
0 0
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dmski
Posts: 328 - Karma: 360
supercooladin"I got slapped in the face by a cock when giving head to my cousin"

Wow coming out of the gate strong! Good on ya!
May 1 2015 1:35PM
1 0
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Nikolaus
Posts: 863 - Karma: 995
flying dildo
May 1 2015 7:36PM
0 0
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ImNotARacist
Posts: 5136 - Karma: -1,032
the heel of your moms foot hit me in the face last night.
May 1 2015 8:14PM
0 0
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stinky_cheese
Posts: 1215 - Karma: 5,118
i caught an edge on my ripstick
May 1 2015 9:18PM
4 0
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Wampire
Posts: 1217 - Karma: 4,684
I got slapped in the face with a cock while picking my little brother up from daycare
May 1 2015 9:21PM
0 1
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gotti
Posts: 4269 - Karma: 4,548
RICK_ROSSi got slapped in the face with my cock while giving head to myself


REPOST. LEAVE.
May 2 2015 5:34PM
0 0
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