drunken quotes

these are all from me this friday. i don't remember saying any of them. a friend wrote the down. if they don't make sense, im sorry. i thought you might enjoy some of them :

stop tickling my phillipino roll

we're gonna paintball tomorrow... with the japanese

negative... with the w

drunk is the way to go... says achilles

i've got a toilet paper roll in my head and its hurts

OW...Fuck...I cant feel it

Its a mute point... stop slapping me

OW!!!...you better be glad that didn't hurt

I'm not gonna get my nipples hard if you keep squeezing them

Josh, you know you can't beat me

if you don't give me a vest for a sessionist, im gonna be mad

their bum is history

By the decree, i declare that no one shall penetrate my anal hole

afternoon is for bitches

stop creating a hole new channel about my nipples

my dong flops alof if your dong flops alof

ya gotta sign up for the light switch before you can use it

im on you like stick on glue

lets go rectibone the situation

her mom would be stoked on my johnson

its like indiana jones with concrete and snakes

my english phrenologist

I hope you get this message... and bone

We can't be denied the call of the wild

We just got our sarah miles on(don't ask)

I guess they're not the dopest counter-terrorist force in the world, i am.

back when our clay is all juicy, im gonna crossbread

come on, come on, get your musketball on

We could maybe eat some scrambled eggs tomorrow

I can't get any funnier than this, im not funny

I hate your seed and the seed i spread onto you

I need to get my rotational drill bit on

You could masterbate to the video for the rest of you life, cause its sentimental

Me:'Stop patronizing me' Friend:'what does patronizing mean?' me:'FUCK YOU!'

I need to put a roofie in tinkerbells waterbowl

lets get a hacksaw

you know, me and lydia just aren't gonna work out

my beer is invincible!!!






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- Josh Rainey
- Jackson Hole

I ain't the type of brotha made for you to start tessin', give me a smith and wesson and i'll have niggas undressin' -nas

My state of mind purple


'hide it in a vibrator and then stick it up your butt and let it vibrate the whole plane ride and through customs. good luck hiding your tiny ass boner while you do it.'-ericpollardkillsit

my gfs sister is fucken hot, so is her mom, i lay in bed at night with my hand on my dick thinking about an incested orgy with the 3 of them, i blow so fast-Lateralis