Today, I received a private message from "tessey4u," another of the notorious private message spammers. I replied, and thought Newschoolers might be interested in the text:
Date Sent: Feb 28 2010 15:37:39 - (read)
tessey4u --> powderbro
My name is tessey,i saw your profile today and became interested in you,i will also like to know you the more,and i want you to send an email to my email address so i can give you my picture for you to know whom i am.Here is my email address( email@example.com) I believe we can move from here I am waiting.
(Remember the distance or co lour does not matter but love matters a lot in life)
Date Sent: Feb 28 2010 16:03:50 - (not read)
powderbro --> tessey4u
My name is Greggory. My friends call me Greggory the Grammar God, because I dislike incorrectly composed literature. Your message should have been written as such:
My name is Tessey. I saw your profile today and became interested in you. I would like to get to know you more, and I'd like you to send me an email so I can give you my picture, so you can determine who I am. Here is my email address: . I believe we can get somewhere from this point. I am waiting.
Remember, the distance between us and the difference in our colors do not matter, but love matters a lot in life.
I'd like to point out, Tessey, that although the majority of internet users are unintelligent enough to be duped by such an incredibly spam-tastic message and desperate enough to believe it, the majority of Newschoolers members are happy with their lives. Many of us have girlfriends, and we are all satisfied by the wonderful sport of skiing. None of us are desperate enough for pictures of you to send you an email, and even if we wanted to look at pictures of a girl named Tessey, we'd use a website called "Google," and thereby bypass the chance that you are an unattractive male.
Thank you for your time, Tessey, as I am sure this is more than you have had to read in quite a long time. On behalf of Newschoolers, please go fuck yourself in a dingy public restroom.