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Ice skating bear kills russian circus band

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ShredBetty
Posts: 478 - Karma: 23
http://www.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/europe/10/23/russia.skating.bear.death/index.html


i died laughing while reading this. a bear? on fucking ice skates?
Oct 23 2009 1:21PM
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teleTay
Posts: 2320 - Karma: 186
its cause russians are crazy
Oct 23 2009 1:30PM
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popNfresh44
Posts: 3757 - Karma: 44
what do you expect to happen when you force a bear to ice skate...obviously it doesn't want to
Oct 23 2009 1:32PM
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timmi
Posts: 12874 - Karma: 3,460
FACT: bears hate being on ice skates
FACT: bears on ice skates will fuck you up.
Oct 23 2009 1:35PM
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Tinga
Posts: 11349 - Karma: 2,333
"Russia has a long-standing tradition of training bears to perform tricks such as riding motorcycles, ice skating, and playing hockey."

thats awesome. im surprised it has never shown up on a viral video or something.
Oct 23 2009 1:40PM
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Big5hifty
Posts: 3243 - Karma: 1,255
i love the bit at the end "fatal attacks are unusual" as if bears on ice skates and motorcycles werent unusual enough
Oct 23 2009 1:41PM
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Kmania
Posts: 756 - Karma: 79
it must have washed them down with a tasty coke

Click for larger image
Oct 23 2009 1:52PM
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Blurst
Posts: 13577 - Karma: 10,168

haa the thread title made me laugh so hard. This must have been a tradition started when russia was training bears to be in their army.

Oct 23 2009 1:54PM
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Chickendodo
Posts: 1426 - Karma: 33
Click for larger image
Oct 23 2009 1:57PM
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LadySaGa
Posts: 774 - Karma: 81
very disappointed when i saw it was an article. i want a vid
Oct 23 2009 2:24PM
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Big_Spence
Posts: 16177 - Karma: 4,352
.
Oct 23 2009 2:44PM
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babujib
Posts: 5039 - Karma: 104
i looked over the site trying to find the onion news logo, to no avail. this reminds me of the underground midget fighting league mauled by a lion found here http://www.newturfers.com/mwf/attach/38/355838/BBCNEWSWorldLionMutilates42MidgetsinCambodianRing-Fight.htm
which ended up being fake.
Oct 23 2009 3:50PM
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Dr.Rick_Marshall
Posts: 407 - Karma: 44
FACT: Bears + Ice Skates= Battlestar Galagtica
Oct 23 2009 4:51PM
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steevner
Posts: 4502 - Karma: 47
Wow, that really sucks. Some guy fucking died. Seeing someone get mauled to death would be so terrible.
Oct 23 2009 5:18PM
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Pippin
Posts: 4846 - Karma: 661
FACT: Bears + Beets= BATTLESTAR GALATICA
Oct 23 2009 5:21PM
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Bob_Loblaw
Posts: 8384 - Karma: 38
He died teaching a fucking bear to ice skate. Darwin award?
Oct 23 2009 5:24PM
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Frank_Spinatra
Posts: 1203 - Karma: 75
I GIVE YOU, ICE SKATING BEARS (someone help if the embed fucks up like it has been)

Oct 23 2009 5:36PM
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natedogg789435
Posts: 1177 - Karma: 9
wrong, it's cause fucking bears shouldn't be ice skating.
Oct 23 2009 5:37PM
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doublexl
Posts: 8407 - Karma: 26
no, russians are definitely crazy.
Oct 23 2009 7:13PM
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anti_bunk
Posts: 2629 - Karma: 329
get off those ice skates bear.  you are a bear not an olympic figure skater.  besides you look rediculus.
Oct 23 2009 7:19PM
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DrZoidberg
Posts: 5675 - Karma: 4,268
In soviet russia, bear rides skates and kills you.
Oct 23 2009 7:21PM
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beezey
Posts: 9027 - Karma: 428

beat me too it............. bastard.

Oct 23 2009 7:31PM
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dilla_says_go
Posts: 5333 - Karma: 168
Russia has a long-standing tradition of training bears to perform tricks such as riding motorcycles, ice skating, and playing hockey. Fatal attacks are unusual.
Oct 23 2009 9:02PM
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inactive
Posts: 4772 - Karma: 97
It is unclear what caused the bear to attack Potapov, 25, nearly severing one of his legs while dragging him across the ice by his neck. Medical personnel were unable to save Potapov, who died at the scene.

it was unclear what... MAYBE IT WAS THE ICE SKATES
Oct 23 2009 10:22PM
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,270
at least Popatov had the best death in history, i mean it really doesn't get more epic
Oct 23 2009 10:30PM
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cams
Posts: 3937 - Karma: 26
My mind is blown to pieces.
Oct 23 2009 11:08PM
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eljusto.
Posts: 2163 - Karma: 457
Poor bears just wanted to drink coke in peace.
Oct 23 2009 11:12PM
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Franny
Posts: 3980 - Karma: 77
I wonder what Dwight Schrute  would say about this.
Oct 23 2009 11:19PM
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Frank_Spinatra
Posts: 1203 - Karma: 75
hahaha at first I was like wtf, they are sliding on their ass only, then around 1 minute they start skating and I was also blown away.  Their technique is actually pretty decent, but more importantly, where the hell did they get those skates?? They have to be custom??  Leftovers from Zedeno Chara?? I need answers.  And for them to maul people with the skates on, they must be really good  to stay on their feet.  We need video from the actual accident.
Oct 23 2009 11:22PM
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Peter.
Posts: 23796 - Karma: 13,012
fuck same. i was scrolling down the thread hoping no one had posted that yet
Oct 23 2009 11:23PM
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eljusto.
Posts: 2163 - Karma: 457
Aren't all russians bears riding unicycles anyway? Dwight Schrute would comment on how he could have been prepared for this, for he is an expert on bears.
Oct 23 2009 11:24PM
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T-Holt
Posts: 5020 - Karma: 639
Hahaha, what the fuck man?
Oct 23 2009 11:27PM
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BootySpunk.
Posts: 8148 - Karma: 84
Dude I have a bear.
Oct 23 2009 11:28PM
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Frank_Spinatra
Posts: 1203 - Karma: 75
I NOW GIVE YOU, BEAR PLAYING HOCKEY ON SKATES


Oct 23 2009 11:29PM
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inactive
Posts: 4772 - Karma: 97
i am dumbfounded
you think you could fit him into fulltitls
Oct 23 2009 11:31PM
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Frank_Spinatra
Posts: 1203 - Karma: 75
hahaha one more.  It's a whole team of bears playing hockey against each other.  Totally ridiculous.


Oct 23 2009 11:36PM
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ShredBetty
Posts: 478 - Karma: 23
hahaha those vids made me laugh so hard. thanks for posting them, they made my day!
Oct 24 2009 12:15AM
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