Red Bull Unrailistic | LIVE Broadcast

Member of the Month

PartyBullshiit
March, 2024

Online

Welcome to the Newschoolers forums! You may read the forums as a guest, however you must be a registered member to post. Register to become a member today!

I just shit my pants.

profile picture
PaleCelery
Posts: 7228 - Karma: 608
[claim]
So I'm sittin in my little bro's room, dominating some nazi zombies, when I feel the call of nature arrive.

"No big dea;", I think out loud.

So I'm holding it in like a champ. Headshot. Another zombie down. All of the sudden I feel a little wet spot in my boxers.

"Oh shit!" I think out loud again

I run to the bathroom, ditch my pants only to realize theres some nice looking chocolate sauce in my fruit of the looms.  Awesome. So now I'm freeballing it, and telling NS my sob story. To add insult to injury, while I'm cleaning up my shitty asshole, my little sister (who's room is across the hall from the bathroom) walks by and goes. "It smells like you crapped your pants!"

Little did she know that she hit the nail right on the head. FML


Moral of the story: You are never too old to shit your pants. So when you do, claim it like a champ.

[/claim]


Apr 1 2009 6:22PM
0 0
profile picture
PaleCelery
Posts: 7228 - Karma: 608
I cant believe this thread made it to a second page
Apr 2 2009 2:02AM
0 0
profile picture
0123456789
Posts: 9226 - Karma: 148
believe it
Apr 2 2009 8:32PM
0 0
profile picture
family_vacation
Posts: 6200 - Karma: 7,841
This stuff is very important.
Apr 2 2009 8:34PM
0 0
profile picture
STREETS
Posts: 1443 - Karma: 15
This is some good shit in this thread HAHAH
Apr 2 2009 8:43PM
0 0
profile picture
Atypical
Posts: 1339 - Karma: 45
this thread made my night.
Apr 2 2009 8:48PM
0 0
profile picture
PaleCelery
Posts: 7228 - Karma: 608
Bringin it back. I dont know why
Dec 15 2009 2:30PM
0 0
profile picture
chad.
Posts: 728 - Karma: 27
me to :(
Dec 15 2009 2:33PM
0 0
profile picture
hellomynameisjef
Posts: 5794 - Karma: 167
i went to africa in 8th grade, and i got salmonella, so when i got back home, i missed 3 days of school because for those three days, i shit rain every hour, on the hour.
Dec 15 2009 3:20PM
0 0
profile picture
TechnoPotamus
Posts: 11626 - Karma: 3,522
freshman year i lived with my best friend from home, we both went to the same college. anyway we would play fart volleyball on occasion when the gas struck. For those unfamiliar it's basically somebody farts, then you have to fart to volley it back to them, and so on and so forth. Yes, I enjoy acting like i'm fucking 5 years old, you should too.

So anyway, on about 3 occasions my competitive spirit, er, stench, got the best of me and I over did it haha Thankfully my buddy would usually submit and forfeit once that happened since he respected my dedication to winning.
Dec 15 2009 3:33PM
0 0
profile picture
spliff.Life
Posts: 7847 - Karma: 1,549
hahahahah I must admit, that has happened to me before, i forget the scenario but i know it has happened
Dec 15 2009 3:37PM
0 0
profile picture
Jimmy.
Posts: 2888 - Karma: 27
this is false. girls don't poop.
Dec 15 2009 3:39PM
0 0
profile picture
Sewardo
Posts: 1404 - Karma: 29
this whole thread is LOLS hardcore.
Dec 15 2009 4:45PM
0 0
profile picture
PaleCelery
Posts: 7228 - Karma: 608
new name bumpppp
Apr 7 2010 6:25PM
0 0
profile picture
T-Holt
Posts: 5020 - Karma: 639
You're a champ.
Apr 7 2010 6:31PM
0 0
profile picture
ImYoung
Posts: 120 - Karma: 47
i shit my pants in class once in grade 4 and my teacher called me out on it


Apr 7 2010 6:43PM
0 0
profile picture
EthanJPAskier
Posts: 1668 - Karma: 248
Hahaha what did she say?

Ummm... excuse me bobby, did you just shit yourself?
Apr 7 2010 6:45PM
0 0
profile picture
ImYoung
Posts: 120 - Karma: 47
haha no it was like

teacher- class something smells funny in hear
me- started crying
teacher- did you have an accident
me- crying and nodding my head "i had a bit of one"
Apr 7 2010 6:49PM
0 0
profile picture
DaveM
Posts: 2936 - Karma: 1,558

Click for larger image

Apr 7 2010 6:56PM
0 0
profile picture
Gameboy
Posts: 2657 - Karma: 126

Yeah I shit in my pants so often.... but i don't care cause I have D-pants:

But I can remember the last time I shat my pants for real, awful feeling.

Apr 7 2010 7:20PM
0 0
profile picture
5teve.
Posts: 610 - Karma: 12
nice          .
Apr 7 2010 7:36PM
0 0
profile picture
leahey
Posts: 2548 - Karma: 32
Never poop outside.
Apr 7 2010 7:41PM
0 0
profile picture
rexalicious.
Posts: 551 - Karma: 57
well props to you for telling us this..
that sucks though, at least you were at home.
Apr 7 2010 7:56PM
0 0
profile picture
J.DUKE
Posts: 1233 - Karma: 38

i got food poisoning last winter. Puked all night starting at 1am till 730 am when my girlfriend finally convinced me to go to the hospital. I called into work and she drove me to the hospital in frisco. At this point I was dry heaving out the window going down I70. Got to the ER, pumped me full of Saline and shit. As we're leaving, I walked into the bathroom, and as soon as i closed the door,

shit myslef standing up.

On top of that, it ends up i was between insurance carriers, so the 2 hrs i was in the Frisco hospital, I got charde $1300

Apr 7 2010 9:50PM
0 0
profile picture
fourtwozero
Posts: 184 - Karma: 9
you might say.. unexpectedly good?
Apr 7 2010 9:53PM
0 0
profile picture
sack
Posts: 4881 - Karma: 147
someone i know pooped his pants when he was like 13-14. we thought someone had stepped in dog crap at first..
Apr 7 2010 10:04PM
0 0
profile picture
Ski.Ballet
Posts: 2860 - Karma: 200
Last year, my roommates and I had a party. I had to get up early the next morning to take an exam, so I crashed pretty early, but everyone else raged super late. Anyway, I'm leaving the house the next morning, and see that this kid we knew was sleeping on the futon in the living room (this will be relevant later). So as I'm walking out the door, I get a faint whiff of shit. It's pretty mild, so I assumed somebody must have just stepped in dog shit, and I leave. I come back from my exam to find both my roommates on the front porch literally doubled over in laughter. "Did you see what happened to the fucking chair?!" Uh oh. Apparently, nobody else had spent the night except for the guy who was passed out on the couch when I left, so at some point during the night, In a drunk, drug-induced stupor, this kid had climbed over a chair to sit on what he thought was the toilet. This toilet, was, in fact, another chair that was conveniently placed in a corner, behind a table and more chairs. How the fuck he managed to do that, we will never know. The shit he took on this chair was unlike anything I've ever seen before. It was a pile of soft serve about a foot in diameter and 4 inches deep. What still haunts me to this day is the fact that after doing that, he pulled his pants up and went back to sleep on my couch. And what the fuck did he use for toilet paper?
Apr 7 2010 10:23PM
0 0
profile picture
Zent33zy
Posts: 1546 - Karma: 389
This thread is gold
Apr 8 2010 12:09AM
0 0
profile picture
MicroMix
Posts: 297 - Karma: 48
I know a kid who hates bathrooms other than the ones in his house so he'll go to camp and hold it in for like a week and when he gets home and relieves himself it flies everywhere lol
Apr 8 2010 12:30AM
0 0
profile picture
mode2n
Posts: 2856 - Karma: 255
win
Apr 8 2010 2:11AM
0 0
profile picture
fourtwozero
Posts: 184 - Karma: 9
this whole thread needs its ass wiped
Apr 8 2010 2:17AM
0 0
profile picture
Ducky.
Posts: 5811 - Karma: 1,420
+ k for..... awesomness
Apr 8 2010 2:22AM
0 0
profile picture
CypressGrove
Posts: 1116 - Karma: 12

i'm reading this as i take a shit. go figure.

and i bet my truck is getting a parking ticket right now out the window i see a cop car next to it...

fuck 2nd time this month..

Apr 8 2010 2:27AM
0 0
profile picture
Elijah.
Posts: 9322 - Karma: 76
Win.
Apr 8 2010 4:51AM
0 0
All times are Eastern (-4)