Welcome one and all to Dick_Squandels HUGE SALE EXTRAVAGANZA....
i promise you will not be disappointed.
Firstly up for Sale we have a lovely pair of DNA underdunk pants. they are a dark brown pair of highly tech pants with a light tan checkered pattern on them, very fresh, sure to attract lady folk. the pants are 15k so you can go swimming in them if you so choose and now for said showcase item.
Price: a measly 70.00USD
they also come with (free of charge) a mystery mark on the ass not sure where it came form not sure where its going.
^^PS> i have the matching jacket for the right price...
secondly on the selling block we have a pair of everyones favorite snowboarder to hate SHAUN WHITE pants. they are silver grey in color and have a tweed like pattern on them they are missing a few buttons but who needs buttons anyway. these are made by everyones favorite snowboarding company burton.
Price: an affordable 60.00USD
nextly we have a uber fly obermeyer kiska parka, now when i say this thing is hot i mean it, the ladies of all ages with be dry humping the ground you walk on. not sure of the waterproofing but i know from first hand experience that this thing will repel any kind of free alcohol people throw at you because you look so damn good in this parka.
Price: a flattering 70.00USD
afterly ive got a pair of salomon performa 2's i believe they are a wonderful pair of boots, a little ugly maybe but hey what can i say we have all once in our life kinda had a thing for the poor ugly girl in our class. so do these boots a favor pick em up love on em for a year or two then dump them on the side of the road by alta for some ski bum to find and have a coronary over. i beleive the size is 30-30.5 if thats possible i dont even remember when i was fitted for these i told the guy size 12 street shoe and he handed me those.
Price: a nifty 30.00USD
nowly we have a super rare red EC headwear baller beanie, which is guaranteed to NOT make the top of your head look like the bloodied end of a tampon. in fact i think it would look pretty snazzy matched up with the obermeyer parka, so that why if you buy the parka you get the hat for free if you don buy the parka it will cost ya.
lastly we have collection of crap from my room that i dont have any space for so im going to sell it one here so it can take up space in someone elses room
Price: a flabergasting, YOU NAME IT AND YOU GOT IT
bling not included
so thats it ladies and gentlemen i hope you had fun and astounded at the majority of crap i have collected throughout my skiing career.