I'm sorry, but I cannot express how much rage I am currently in. I thought you """accidentally""" sucking Porteous's dick was alright, but THIS. I'd rather be sitting with my weird russian uncle and smoke a hookah with him than experience this. I don't watch halfpipe skiing, but I would watch Jesus man any day going through that pipe. You didn't tell me Wise was at COP. I am beyond disappointed at you, why do you have to do this to me?
Okay, well once I am back from Florida (after fucking a few crocodiles, smoking meth and socializing with the local crackheads, of course) I am going to set a satanic curse upon COP and Lake Louise. That's right. I will be sacrificing 666 goats.
Due to limited sources, I will need to sacrifice the goats on my travels. To make the process easier, if anyone here on ns finds a goat lying around, chant these words:
ψ̷̡̱͕̎̿̐ ̸̹̤͒̃͝.̵̭͔̈́.̵͓͎̓w̷͍̪̋͗̕ĕ̵͓̘́̒ͅ ̴͍̯͐̃m̶͉̿ĕ̸̡̻̕t̵̪̍ ̵̨̻̪̓̀e̴̝͚͒y̸̯̹͐è̵͖͕̪͒ ̷̗̓̋͆t̷̳͐͐o̵̹̯͌̍͒ ̶̡̬͋̑̔͜ę̴͇͙̚y̴̟͋̿ë̶̪́͠.̶̳̘̿.̵̜͈͒̑̓ý̸̩̤ǫ̵̛̦͌̿ṳ̶͈̇ ̸̳̗̀l̸̥̫͋̾̚ë̶̘f̸̙̾t̵̤͒̿̅.̴̖͓͐.̴̖̫̆ǐ̶͇̖͇̏̅m̴͍̺̲͒.̷̨̥́̀͌t̵̡̮͉̽̔͝h̴̡̤̋͒̒e̶̢̮̪̚ ̶̟͊̄d̶̡̬̯̽e̷̡̒̏͘s̵̙̔t̴̬́͐r̷̛̗̞̀̌ͅȏ̶̢̫̰y̸̢̙͖̌e̷̻̳̒ŕ̸̈́ͅ.̴̨̦͐̕.̴̝͑̈́̈́I̴̥͍͗̄͝'̷͍̬̙̾̃m̴͎̠̼̈́̍̓ ̴͖̏͒ţ̸̛̾̍͜ͅh̷͙̦̙̏̓͂e̸̪̅͛̅ ̴̨̦̖̇͝c̴̡̬̑͆o̸̝̣͍̒n̵̛̺͂s̴̠̅̈́ư̴͇͙̈͌ͅm̴̘̝͚̍͘e̶͇̍̓r̴͖̆ ̷͇̳̥͂o̸̝̅͐f̵̘͖̪̓ ̵̢̡͚͊̋s̵̞̯̰̈́͠ơ̵̢̘̻̆͛ǘ̵͠ͅl̶̡͚͘s̸̗̽͗̕.̵̢̅.̶̢͌y̶͓͆ǒ̸̱͔̚u̷͎̝̳̓ ̶̭͊̽̀t̶̢͚̚͝͝u̷͓̳͆͌͠r̸̖̩͂̿̐n̴͖̊̉̆ę̴̈́d̶̡̫̐͗͝ ̶̻̤͌͠͠b̵̰̜͊á̵͍̜͚c̶̟̺̈́͑̊ḱ̵͔͚̈.̶̢̮̗̏.̷̿͛̚ͅ.̷̧̙͝y̵̡͙͕̅o̶͍̭͍͌̎͆ù̵̬̘̫̓͂ ̵̝͇̙̐̎͘s̷̪͌̃h̴̫̭̓̄ͅe̷̢̹̯͋̀e̶̟̙̾p̶̢̤̋ ̴̰͖̑͋ͅh̸̜̲̳̿̒̅ä̶̩̺̖̇̎v̵̡̨͙͌̾͊e̵̺̽͌ ̷̻͍̌̏͠n̵̪̜͉͋o̸̦͒͝ ̸͙̳̘͑͆i̸̠̦̋̐d̷̨̡͚̂͐͂è̸̦̪͝͠a̴̺͖̽͘͜ ̶̖̫̎͐m̴̫̙̍͑́y̵̖͛ ̷̫̲͉̚p̸̘͋͂͂õ̷͙̻̭͂w̴̦̬̔ḛ̸̦͊͊r̸̲͖̓̋͠.̴̨̛̤̭̂.̴̨̛̮̍.̴̳̋I̸̮͇̽̇ ̸̻̎ȁ̶̮̞̓̏m̸͙̀̀͐ ̸̮̿h̸̻́ḛ̴͗̽̈́ṟ̵͕̽e̸͉͔̠̎͗.̶͍͎́̀̓.̴̷̢̱͎̻̌́̓́ ̷̹̘͗̾ψ̸̧̛̦͓͗ ̷̢̤̪̿̈ψ̷̪͗ ̷̩̅͗͝
which translates to:
.we met eye to eye..you left..I'm the destroyer..I'm the consumer of souls..you turned back...you sheep have no idea my power...I am here..
That would be greatly appreciated. I will reward you later.
Again, I warn you Vienna.