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Drunk/high stories

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Morriski_
Posts: 179 - Karma: 895
Title says it all, post some cringy/funny/scary shit that happened to you or someone else

I watched someone piss in someone's closet whilst they were drunk, best part about it was that it was the same closet they were keeping all their Christmas presents
Dec 9 2015 2:42PM
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Mr.Haverkamp
Posts: 25 - Karma: 114
One time I peed in OP's moms butt
Dec 9 2015 2:43PM
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Bogs
Posts: 4296 - Karma: 1,361
Your best drunk story is seeing someone piss in a closet? How old are you, 16?
Dec 9 2015 3:24PM
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Mingg
Posts: 13804 - Karma: 45,917
Last weekend theabortionator and I killed beer pong in 2 shots. We're besties now, btw.




On halloween freshmen year of college I got on the drunk bus back to my dorm after a night of intense partying and skating at the ski house. It rained earlier in the day so it was a little wet outside. I was sitting there belligerent with my roommates and I REALLY had to pee. I mean, I was crying I had to pee so bad. I totally thought I was going to piss myself.

So we get to this stop and I'm like Ally I can't do it, so we get off. I stand there a minute waiting for the bus to leave so I can pee in the grass and it doesn't leave. So drunk me says fuck it. I was going to walk over the hill and pee on the other side so the bus couldn't see. I stumble up the hill, but it's wet and my heels get stuck in the mud. I have no choice but to pee right then and there. So I did. I popped a squat right there in front of the bus.

The next morning I woke up and went on twitter and what do you know? There's a photo of drunk me pissing in the grass posted on SUNY party stories.

It ended up winning the SUNY party story for the weekend. I still claim that shit hard.
Dec 9 2015 3:38PM
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270on420out
Posts: 7469 - Karma: 50,477
Last time I drank, I think I was 14. My friends stole 2 bottles of 151 from their parents, and they came to my place. We all drank like 9 shots within like 1 minute. We were all waiting around like "wtf it didn't work". And then it hit us. Don't remember much of the night. I haven't drank since.
Dec 9 2015 3:52PM
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proZach
Posts: 7163 - Karma: 917
MinggIt ended up winning the SUNY party story for the weekend. I still claim that shit hard.


I wouldn't
Dec 9 2015 3:56PM
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Bogs
Posts: 4296 - Karma: 1,361
THEDIRTYBUBBLELast time I drank, I think I was 14. My friends stole 2 bottles of 151 from their parents, and they came to my place. We all drank like 9 shots within like 1 minute. We were all waiting around like "wtf it didn't work". And then it hit us. Don't remember much of the night. I haven't drank since.


I really hope it was you and, like, three other friends.
Dec 9 2015 3:59PM
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270on420out
Posts: 7469 - Karma: 50,477
BogsI really hope it was you and, like, three other friends.


There were 5 of us. We were stringbeans.
Dec 9 2015 4:03PM
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Titus69
Posts: 9316 - Karma: 17,449
MinggLast weekend theabortionator and I killed beer pong in 2 shots. We're besties now, btw.




On halloween freshmen year of college I got on the drunk bus back to my dorm after a night of intense partying and skating at the ski house. It rained earlier in the day so it was a little wet outside. I was sitting there belligerent with my roommates and I REALLY had to pee. I mean, I was crying I had to pee so bad. I totally thought I was going to piss myself.

So we get to this stop and I'm like Ally I can't do it, so we get off. I stand there a minute waiting for the bus to leave so I can pee in the grass and it doesn't leave. So drunk me says fuck it. I was going to walk over the hill and pee on the other side so the bus couldn't see. I stumble up the hill, but it's wet and my heels get stuck in the mud. I have no choice but to pee right then and there. So I did. I popped a squat right there in front of the bus.

The next morning I woke up and went on twitter and what do you know? There's a photo of drunk me pissing in the grass posted on SUNY party stories.

It ended up winning the SUNY party story for the weekend. I still claim that shit hard.


Pics or gtfo




A few months ago my friend had a small party after a football game, one kid got very drunk and apparently woke up in the middle of the night and pissed all over the basement floor. There were like 2-3 girls and a few guys sleeping near him to luckily I was in a different room.
Dec 9 2015 4:04PM
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Stinging_Roger
Posts: 298 - Karma: 1,501
Two years ago a girl from my school had an open house party so me and my friends decided to go. My one buddy ended up pissing in the girl's shampoo bottles

Pure evil.
Dec 9 2015 4:16PM
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Bogs
Posts: 4296 - Karma: 1,361
THEDIRTYBUBBLEThere were 5 of us. We were stringbeans.


Awesome. Such a funny story for so many reasons.
Dec 9 2015 4:47PM
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MustBeMattyB
Posts: 495 - Karma: 2,147
Relevant, cause none of us will beat this. Skip to 2:00 unless you wanna hear him plug his shit new cash grab movie.

https://www.newschoolers.com/videos/watch/799812/Seth-Rogen-Got-So-High-He-Ended-Up-in-Paris
Dec 9 2015 4:56PM
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Morriski_
Posts: 179 - Karma: 895
BogsYour best drunk story is seeing someone piss in a closet? How old are you, 16?


never said it was my best, just posted it because it happened a few days ago
Dec 9 2015 5:07PM
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Momo.
Posts: 217 - Karma: 1,166
Gathered a good group of friends at my house and ended up getting so fucked up that we thought one of our friends was possessed by a demon. Two of us tried performing an exorcism on him while we was wigging out on the floor. The kid ended up throwing up an entire box of pizza after while another friend thought he was on a journey through the woods (was walking from the couch to the fridge). We started to sober up and realized there were two new people at the house.. still don't remember how they got there.

There was also another time where I covered myself in dirt and thought I was turning into a mushroom. My theory at the time was that I ate a mushrooms, therefore I should become a mushroom.
Dec 9 2015 5:15PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 50630 - Karma: 150,898
I drank a beer and took a hit of weed and things got crazy
Dec 9 2015 5:16PM
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Morriski_
Posts: 179 - Karma: 895
Momo.Gathered a good group of friends at my house and ended up getting so fucked up that we thought one of our friends was possessed by a demon. Two of us tried performing an exorcism on him while we was wigging out on the floor. The kid ended up throwing up an entire box of pizza after while another friend thought he was on a journey through the woods (was walking from the couch to the fridge). We started to sober up and realized there were two new people at the house.. still don't remember how they got there.

There was also another time where I covered myself in dirt and thought I was turning into a mushroom. My theory at the time was that I ate a mushrooms, therefore I should become a mushroom.


fucking hell, talk about a bad high, what were you guys on??
Dec 9 2015 5:22PM
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boozer
Posts: 511 - Karma: 35,369
I got drunk and made a thread on this sight in high school. I guess it's a big deal now
Dec 9 2015 5:39PM
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arnie_grape
Posts: 3275 - Karma: 9,903
I took a piss on a bus in the dominican. but it's probably normal down there.
Dec 9 2015 6:33PM
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humpty
Posts: 1189 - Karma: 3,146
4th of july, me and my friend were baked and munchin on some free hot dogs. My friend decides he is done eating and throws his food scraps away into the "nearest trash can" . Right after he finished disposing of the scraps, we both looked at each other and realized he just dumped all his shit into a post office collection box, not a trash.
Dec 9 2015 7:17PM
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Titus69
Posts: 9316 - Karma: 17,449
BortyI drank a beer and took a hit of weed and things got crazy



you must have been hella cross faded
Dec 9 2015 8:10PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 50630 - Karma: 150,898
boozerI got drunk and made a thread on this sight in high school. I guess it's a big deal now


Worst original post/most successful thread combo is insane.

The first half a page or so was horrible imo, but will probably be a billion pages long in a few years. Also even if you forgot your password and never made another post, you'll have a million k pretty soon
Dec 9 2015 8:27PM
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Morriski_
Posts: 179 - Karma: 895
boozerI got drunk and made a thread on this sight in high school. I guess it's a big deal now


one day i hope to be as influential and successful as you, boozer
Dec 9 2015 8:29PM
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Morriski_
Posts: 179 - Karma: 895
BortyWorst original post/most successful thread combo is insane.

The first half a page or so was horrible imo, but will probably be a billion pages long in a few years. Also even if you forgot your password and never made another post, you'll have a million k pretty soon


I was surprised nobody had thought of doing this shit before

Another story I just remembered about was the time some dude who was probably high on heroin or some shit held a knife to a group of me and my mates and ordered us to be his 'hostages' when we were drinking in some woods near where we live, ive never ran so fast whilst drunk and i swear it was like something out of a screamer movie
Dec 9 2015 8:34PM
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theabortionator
Posts: 50630 - Karma: 150,898
Morriski_I was surprised nobody had thought of doing this shit before

Another story I just remembered about was the time some dude who was probably high on heroin or some shit held a knife to a group of me and my mates and ordered us to be his 'hostages' when we were drinking in some woods near where we live, ive never ran so fast whilst drunk and i swear it was like something out of a screamer movie



It's less about the thread and more about what sticks. Although post your latest purchase was bound to be a success because of the excitement/people wanting to brag when they buy new shit.


Also, were you the kid that posted about getting robbed on here like 4 years ago?
Dec 9 2015 8:44PM
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Morriski_
Posts: 179 - Karma: 895
BortyIt's less about the thread and more about what sticks. Although post your latest purchase was bound to be a success because of the excitement/people wanting to brag when they buy new shit.


Also, were you the kid that posted about getting robbed on here like 4 years ago?



I did get robbed like 3-4 years ago but ive only been a member since like oct 2013 or something, may have made a post about it back then but honestly cant remember
Dec 9 2015 8:50PM
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akt416
Posts: 246 - Karma: 566
mont trembling, hotel about 20 minutes from the mountain, school trip, junior year. Killed a 350$ bottle of cognac in about 10 minutes with my buddy, (he's loaded, thats how we got the bottle) and proceeded to what we thought was a bus for the grocery store, as we ran out of beer and needed to get more. somehow we ended up at the base of mont tremblant, and we saw the gondola was running. didn't know but there was actually a party happening at the top of the hill, organized for one of the other schools in the area. Hopped in the gondola, proceeded to take another 8-10 shots and about 5 minutes later we realized there was actually two other girls in the gondola with us. (yes it actually took us that long to realize) being the gentleman, we offered the girls a shot and partied the rest of the way up. long story short, i ended up getting a really sad otphj in the gondola, and i was quite satisfied for the night. (dudes, don't act like you wouldn't throuroughly enjoy that too) got to the top, continued to rage face for about two hours before coming back down and heading back to the hotel for a night of about 35 shot skis in random rooms around the hotel. got videos of all of them. quite a fun night.
Dec 9 2015 8:53PM
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qazwsxedc34
Posts: 2831 - Karma: 2,374
Anyone here ingested San Pedro Cacti??
Dec 9 2015 10:17PM
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soulskier
Posts: 17805 - Karma: 3,819
I don't care if they're aliens or vampires we need to round them up and fuck them until they're dead
Dec 9 2015 10:39PM
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Lskier_
Posts: 183 - Karma: 1,952
Once me and a friend went to the grocery store when we were very high to buy supplies for a bbq. I rode one of those grandma go-cart things with a shopping basket on the front cause why tf not. anyways after we were done shopping we went to self checkout to avoid all social interaction and i scanned all my items and put them into the basket and drove off to return the granny mobile. we left the store and were half way home when i thought to myself "how much was all of this?" then i thought to myself "wait a second.. i didnt fucking pay for any of this cause i was to focused on putting the grocerys in the basket and dip tf out" so it was about $50 worth of food that we took from hannies.
Dec 10 2015 8:41AM
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no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,260
akt416mont trembling, hotel about 20 minutes from the mountain, school trip, junior year. Killed a 350$ bottle of cognac in about 10 minutes with my buddy, (he's loaded, thats how we got the bottle) and proceeded to what we thought was a bus for the grocery store, as we ran out of beer and needed to get more. somehow we ended up at the base of mont tremblant, and we saw the gondola was running. didn't know but there was actually a party happening at the top of the hill, organized for one of the other schools in the area. Hopped in the gondola, proceeded to take another 8-10 shots and about 5 minutes later we realized there was actually two other girls in the gondola with us. (yes it actually took us that long to realize) being the gentleman, we offered the girls a shot and partied the rest of the way up. long story short, i ended up getting a really sad otphj in the gondola, and i was quite satisfied for the night. (dudes, don't act like you wouldn't throuroughly enjoy that too) got to the top, continued to rage face for about two hours before coming back down and heading back to the hotel for a night of about 35 shot skis in random rooms around the hotel. got videos of all of them. quite a fun night.


So according to that story you had over 50 drinks in a night? Seems legit.
Dec 10 2015 10:41AM
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No.Quarter
Posts: 5257 - Karma: 16,944
A couple weekends ago a couple of my buddies and I made a shotski and of course we had to test it out before we showed it to our friends. So we put down a solid 5 or 6 shots, and then took it up a couple floors to show our friends and almost got caught by an RA with it. So when we got to their room of course we had to do a couple (several) demonstrations. But then we were out of our booze for the night so we made a run to the store and then took a couple shots in the parking lot, you know just to make sure it wasn't poisoned before we brought it back to our friends. When we get back there are like 5 new people so of course we have to show them how to use our shotski also. That's when I blacked out, it was like 10 pm. I came to on the shitter at like 2 am and then proceeded to barf my brains out with my pants still down, unfortunately a janitor was in there and alerted my friend's RA who also alerted my friends. My friends got the door open and I was chillin there with my ass hanging out, which I saw as the perfect opportunity to moon my friends, but much to my surprise I see their RA standing there and I when I realize my fuckup I just start laughing so hard I start to tear up. Luckily the RA also thought this was absurd and too funny to write me up. So after that I hurled some more, possibly had alcohol poisoning, and my friend got me to get to my room, and being still pretty drunk I didn't realize it was 3 am at this point, so I called up a ladyfriend of mine and hooked up for a while until I just passed out.

tl;dr made a shotski, mooned an RA, passed out when hooking up with a girl.
Dec 10 2015 11:04AM
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Lus146
Posts: 422 - Karma: 2,286
First time I ever smoked weed, it was in a tiny playground at night in a super suburban development with a strict curfew. Everyone hates it there. There was 7 of us squeezed onto this tiny playground, smoking out of this one chick's really nice bowl. I was about five hits in, and thankfully even though it was my first time, I got high. We were all laughing over something stupid and we heard a twig break and some voices. We all look at each other and bolt. When I Say bolt, I mean a bunch of high teenagers scrambling out of a tiny playground, a few went down the slide, and other went down the rock wall and those climbing rope things. So then the two other guys and I went back to my buddy's house. It was pitch black and we were too scared to turn a light on because somebody might call the cops (no joke shit like that happens) so we couldn't see, completely high, walking through all these back trails in pitch black but we eventually made it back and watched Inglorious Bastards. Good night I will remember it forever.
Dec 10 2015 11:17AM
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akt416
Posts: 246 - Karma: 566
no_steezeSo according to that story you had over 50 drinks in a night? Seems legit.


Half a bottle is 13 shots, +8-10 in the gondala, and I had maybe 5 back in the hotel. We didn't have all 35 of the shotskis lol, we just carried it around and offered it to people lol
Dec 10 2015 12:18PM
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IGH
Posts: 49 - Karma: 181
Storytime: back when I was an at-risk youth (about one year ago), me and some friends were on a 3am run to timmys, on our way back we were approached by a musty ass old guys who asked if we wanted some blow, we said no and started to walk away when a drunk english kid we were with misinterpereted it as if we wanted a blowjob and said that there was someone down the street who wanted a handie. Not taking any shit, he started getting pissed off and jogged toward cette english kid. It's important to know that this was in B.C in the dead of winter, so almost everywhere was coated with ice. We were scared as balls as we assumed he had a knife or some shit. Then right as he was a few metres from us he did a massive facedive and got knocked out cold. We made sure he wasn't dead and took him into a bus depot bathroom and left. 8/8 fun night timmys was prime.
Dec 10 2015 1:49PM
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crotchvent
Posts: 1527 - Karma: 2,182
I've get super weird dreams when Im high and they seem super real. This one was last week. I was at Walmart the other night buying some hit dog buns for 1.98. DecideE I didn't need the receipt so I threw it in the trash. Well I get about 2 minutes down the rode after leaving walmart and then 5 squad cars shop and 2 swat vans which pull me over an all have their guns pointing at me. Then one of the cops comes to my window hands me the receipt I threw away and gives me a warning that it's illegal to throw receipts away and next time it will be a thousand dollar fine.
Dec 10 2015 7:37PM
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DirtYStylE
Posts: 3634 - Karma: 8,747
Whose doughnut's are those? Oh fuck yeah. They're mine. - Balto
Dec 15 2015 9:28PM
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CHORIZO
Posts: 2003 - Karma: 10,036
last time i got drunk i got an mip, last time i got high a cop showed up at the hottub
Dec 15 2015 10:12PM
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BigPurpleSkiSuit
Posts: 8465 - Karma: 57,196
Was hanging with friend and his gf after I broke up with my ex last summer on a warm Thursday night in SLC. We had many 2 dollar tequila shots at bodega, and went over to a local bar called the green pig. Friends gf sees pipes going up to the roof while we're waiting in line and we all climb up on the roof at about 11:30 Thursday night. We hop across some adjacent roofs where my friend climbs to the top of a water tower on a sketch rusty ladder. After an hour or so we're sobering up trying to figure out how to get off the roof without anyone knowing we're up there. We go back to the pipes and my friend's gf climbs down them, I'm set to go next. We hear the locked door moving about 10 feet away from us and my friend bolts to the other part of the roof. I just kind of stand there and some bartender opens the door. He asks me what the fuck I'm doing up here, and I'm just like, I dont have any good reason, I'll head out. Im really worried about cops being at the door, and he just shakes his head and goes, "fucking Thursdays man". He asks where my friend is, I tell him I dont know and he goes and finds him on the other part of the roof. We both get escorted out and count ourselves lucky and go home for the night.
Jun 3 2020 5:40PM
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