So heres my great day. I wake up around 10 ish and am like “ohh tight no school casue we got some snow.� So decide its time for a “solo destroy a rail somewhere in town day.� I hit the spot, it's at Phillips Academy(the school were president bush jr. went to). A long hand rail. It's really cool looking and just about the only do-able rail in my town I haven’t slayed. I dig for about an hour and greased it twice. Then I hear the distinct sound of one of those golf cart things with a plow that clear off pathways. So I grab up my shit and run back up the in-run and toss down my skis right in the way and stand over them. The guy stops and says something like “hey buddy I really don’t wanna do this but my boss said to take down your jump� and he's wasted as usuall with most plow guys. I take this as an advantage and start arguing. I tell him I'll take it down when I'm done and that I'll keep it really clean. He gets all mad and radios one of the damn security guards.
Now here’s something about the PAP’s (p.a. police) they are all bastards. I've lived 2 mins away from the campus for my whole life and as long as anyone can remember there has always been a big rivalry between the students and local kids, so the security guards are there too. So I've had my fair share of run ins with the paps. As with all security guards they have very little power. They cant hold you, arrest you, and you can't get in trouble for running from them. And boy do they love to power trip.
Anyways back to the tale. I hear a loud “WOOOP� of a siren. So officer douche nozzle gets out and walks up the path and says to drop the shovel. I laugh because hes acting so serious like it’s a weapon. He then goes into some spiel…
Pap “dammit son don’t you know that this is private property, there’s no trespassing!�
Me “really I’ve lived in town for a lonnnng time and never have had trouble with you people before�
Pap “well now you have trouble!�
Me “haha ok well 'll tell you what I'll do for ya, I'll get out of here before theres any more trouble cause I know how you and your boys don't like to get your panties in a twist� (then he got MAD)
Pap “ARE YOU STUPID�
Me “sir, I don’t believe we are here to debate the fact of my intelligence�
Pap “well I really think you are! How would you like it if someone came to your house and decided to build a jump?�
Me “well I'd be pretty pumped actually, I mean someone digging for me! I just get to hit it without any work�
Pap “alright that’s it you better get out of here right now�
Me “ok ok, I'll do that, but just a hint ocifer(“ossifur� yess I actually said it like that) I think you should start working the night shift if you want to catch me again cause ohh I will indeed be back here tonight to finish what I’ve started�
Pap “you… you…�
But the saga continues. I get in my truck and take off my boots put my stuff away. As I start it up I realize his car is in the middle of this little driveway place where I parked. The guy is on his phone probably calling for more people to get on duty for tonight. So what better to do but push it out of the way! Ever so gently I start pushing the front bumper of his car and its just sliding on the snow away, I get all giggly and push the sucker right up a snowbank. Ohh boy I love my ’89 F150 with the big brush guard in the front. So I floor it outta there and go home and call it a successful day. On the ride back I get a little sketched out cause I figured he got my plate number. When I get home, to my absolute satisfaction there was still a ton of snow covering my whole bumper and plate! Today was a good day!
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