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March, 2024

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Will my friend pass his drug test?

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werd.
Posts: 967 - Karma: 4,330
Serious question for those of you who have actually been drug tested or know anything about how they work.

My friend had to get drug tested for his job today (by a legit doctor, not some home 24 hr shit). The last time he smoked was 10 days ago, but before that he was probably smoking about every day for a week, and before that probably about once a week for a long time. He's been drinking a lot of water, and today before going to take his test he took 2 b12 vitamins and a multivitamin, and drank 3-4 water bottles.

Do you think he'll pass, honestly?
Jul 2 2013 1:03PM
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Randy_Quench
Posts: 5447 - Karma: 4,342
doubt it. have him fake it.
Jul 2 2013 1:06PM
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Huck_Norris
Posts: 11487 - Karma: 18,627
If you have to ask, the answer is always no.
Jul 2 2013 1:06PM
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howlongcanausern
Posts: 4982 - Karma: 1,737
no
Jul 2 2013 1:06PM
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The_Real_EWilly
Posts: 395 - Karma: 1,321
Since your friend is most likely you then probably not
Jul 2 2013 1:08PM
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beezey
Posts: 9027 - Karma: 428
No should have gotten fake piss
Jul 2 2013 1:09PM
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FreeskiThe603
Posts: 861 - Karma: 1,409
Click for larger image
Jul 2 2013 1:10PM
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werd.
Posts: 967 - Karma: 4,330
hah it's actually not me
Jul 2 2013 1:11PM
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J-C
Posts: 1138 - Karma: 3,683

Jul 2 2013 1:11PM
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werd.
Posts: 967 - Karma: 4,330
He's in denial right now lol, any positive comments?
Jul 2 2013 1:15PM
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howlongcanausern
Posts: 4982 - Karma: 1,737
a change in career path is an oppourtunity!!! unless, you know, this is his first job, or an internship needed to graduate college, or relies on this income to be independent/survive...otherwise he's fucked
Jul 2 2013 1:17PM
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Charlie_Kelly
Posts: 11953 - Karma: 12,292
The only thing that really works is exercise. Exercising two weeks before (running, biking, or any high fat burning activity) will release the thc from the fat stores and allow it to be proccessed by the liver and kidneys. It is key only to drink extensive amounts of water until this point to flush the released thc from your system. 4-7 days before the test one needs to halt all activity and eat fatty foods to allow any remaining thc to go dormant in the fat cell stores as to only allow trace amounts to be released into the urine. When taking the test, never fill the cup when you start peeing, always go from mid stream.

Cranberry juice=bullshit

niacin=bullshit

drinking copious amounts of water without exercise=bullshit

cleansing products=bullshit


So to answer your question, if your friend didn't do any of this and this is a lab test, he's 95% fucked (unless he has a high metabolism and gets lucky)
Jul 2 2013 1:19PM
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Balbertt
Posts: 1585 - Karma: 4,723
have him drink water until he pisses clear.
Jul 2 2013 1:20PM
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JakeAssBeatClap
Posts: 6673 - Karma: 2,535
All depends on how fat the kid is. If he is a skinny chicken fucker then he might be fine. If he is a tubby chicken fucker he is fucked. Hydrate, sweat, and that's about all he can do.
Jul 2 2013 2:12PM
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Randy_Quench
Posts: 5447 - Karma: 4,342
this will do absolutely nothing. clear piss just means you are hydrated..
Jul 2 2013 2:19PM
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B-ren
Posts: 21 - Karma: 16
no
Jul 2 2013 2:22PM
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Huck_Norris
Posts: 11487 - Karma: 18,627
that is flat out not true.

I knew a kid in HS that had to piss weekly for his probation. The kid would fucking stay up all night ripping gravs and generally giving zero fucks. He would just drink about a gallon the night before the test and again in the morning. He did this every week for at least a year and never got pinched for anything- and it certainly wasn't for lack of smoking weed.

If it's a piss test, all you have to do is dilute it enough to get under the ppm that makes the test pop. Some tests check for this but it only gives you an inconclusive and therefore gives you more time to pass it naturally.

Jul 2 2013 2:23PM
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werd.
Posts: 967 - Karma: 4,330
finally a positive response!
Jul 2 2013 2:27PM
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Toaster-Tony
Posts: 3531 - Karma: 5,850
Tell your "friend" that no person is the same
that there are a lot of factors that go into this like fat %, workout habits, how fast you burn fat, and how much "your friend" has been smoking. So who knows? I guess we'll find out.
Jul 2 2013 2:30PM
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Ribss.
Posts: 3442 - Karma: 3,344
Honestly, he will not pass.

You needed to be drinking cranberry juice and taking Niacin.
Jul 2 2013 2:32PM
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*DUMBCAN*
Posts: 2447 - Karma: 5,627
I'm not sure about this. We need to perform several clinical trials followed by a meta-analysis to confirm.

Any volunteers for test subjects?
Jul 2 2013 2:53PM
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Huck_Norris
Posts: 11487 - Karma: 18,627
I'm in... For science.
Jul 2 2013 2:53PM
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bibs_skibum
Posts: 4462 - Karma: 449
If you don't have the maturity to stop smoking weed for a month or so to pass a screening, then you aren't worth employing. Sounds like he's not too serious about getting a new job.
Jul 2 2013 3:09PM
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howlongcanausern
Posts: 4982 - Karma: 1,737
the mere suggestion of personal responsibility is not popular here
Jul 2 2013 3:15PM
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Huck_Norris
Posts: 11487 - Karma: 18,627
Lol... They're hiring drunks left and right so suck a cock already with your high and mighty bullshit, mmkay?


Jul 2 2013 3:17PM
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Dingo69
Posts: 1330 - Karma: -171
Wow arent you a prickly motherfucker
Jul 2 2013 3:18PM
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pat_in_the_hat
Posts: 3019 - Karma: 2,695
paging doctor buzz kill......

Jul 2 2013 3:19PM
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Balbertt
Posts: 1585 - Karma: 4,723
It also means your system is flushed out
Jul 2 2013 3:19PM
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act.resist
Posts: 8875 - Karma: 513
Plain and simple no.
Jul 2 2013 3:20PM
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EllieMae
Posts: 213 - Karma: 1,087
he might, i ended up in the hospital on 4/20 last year and they gave me a drug test i came out clean and i drink lots of water.
Jul 2 2013 3:20PM
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Randy_Quench
Posts: 5447 - Karma: 4,342
lol your right, your idea is fool proof.
Jul 2 2013 3:21PM
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act.resist
Posts: 8875 - Karma: 513
Youre digestive system possibly, but water doesnt clean your blood and your kidneys discard blood waste into your pee
Jul 2 2013 3:24PM
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Balbertt
Posts: 1585 - Karma: 4,723
Exactly, if you keep drinking water and peeing it out your speeding up the process of your kindneys discarding blood waste. So the whole trick is to pee it all out before your drug test. Then when the test comes you have no drug filled waste left for your kindeys to discard.
Jul 2 2013 3:29PM
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Huck_Norris
Posts: 11487 - Karma: 18,627
It simply does not work that fast, especially with weed.

The only reason the water trick works is because it dilutes your piss so much that your ppm dips low enough to fly below the radar. If you were to stop drinking water thinking you've flushed your system clean, you would piss dirty.
Jul 2 2013 3:32PM
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werd.
Posts: 967 - Karma: 4,330
You sound like you'd be very fun at parties
Jul 2 2013 3:42PM
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Balbertt
Posts: 1585 - Karma: 4,723
Thats what I was trying to say. You just said it better haha.
Jul 2 2013 3:43PM
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Holte
Posts: 10730 - Karma: 7,744
That's why he makes the big bucks.
Jul 2 2013 4:01PM
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EricCartman
Posts: 268 - Karma: 410
No it doesn't... it just means your piss is diluted with so much water... It will come up as a hot dilute unless you also are taking creatine supplements. Diluted = Failed test in the courts eyes and most employers. Get your facts right before you speak you retard.
Jul 2 2013 4:05PM
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ski4fun420
Posts: 902 - Karma: 842
I had the chance to do a paper on drug-testing in the workplace while in college. He needs another 20 days of no smoking bud to get his ng level lower. Hard smokers 28 = days. burning again after 10 days just set him back the whole 28 days minimum to piss clean.
Jul 2 2013 4:10PM
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Charlie_Kelly
Posts: 11953 - Karma: 12,292
Oh really? I stop smoking 10 days before a drug test, drank at least a gallon of water a day three days prior and still failed. Wanna know why? Like you said, the test was made to tell if you were diluting. Plus your metabolism also plays a huge factor in how fast you process thc, not everyone is the same.

If its a lab test they most certainly will tell he has diluted piss. Thats all water is good for if you dont excersise and its not even guaranteed to help you pass. IDK what kind of tests your friend was taking but if he drank a gallon the night before and a gallon the morning of his piss would most certainly be clear, that alone is enough to fail. And some labs will fail you if you have an inconclusive fyi...
Jul 2 2013 4:34PM
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Backyard.Skier
Posts: 5397 - Karma: 1,497
tell him to buy 15-20L of cranberry juice and pound it back (only works if you had a few days before) its perfect for detox. sorry but your friend is fucked and water does nothing to flush it from your body. should have taken cocaine or meth... would have been out of his system in time hahaha
Jul 2 2013 4:36PM
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Huck_Norris
Posts: 11487 - Karma: 18,627
Ahahaha that sucks dude sorry to hear that. Are you, uh... portly out of curiosity?

Maybe they're stepping up their test game since I've been a bad kid? I dunno man. Not hiring someone for being well hydrated doesn't sound like responsible behavior to me.


Jul 2 2013 4:41PM
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Charlie_Kelly
Posts: 11953 - Karma: 12,292
Yeah man they are just starting to catch on. Now they assume that if there is no creatine in your piss or if your piss is clear you are trying to hide something and will fail you based on that. Luckily the test I failed wasn't for a job, it was to live at home and I was given a second chance, but yeah if your piss is uncharacteristic of regular piss it raises a lot of eye brows and usual leads to a fail.

Didn't try to sound like a dick fyi, just trying to help out my fellow smokers with the right facts instead of these myths that will end up wasting their time and money.
Jul 2 2013 4:51PM
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howlongcanausern
Posts: 4982 - Karma: 1,737
oh damn your parents were drug testing you? that's gotta be embarrassing
Jul 2 2013 4:55PM
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DanielPlainview
Posts: 391 - Karma: 1,708
No he'll probably fail but you can buy detox drinks at your local pharmacy for $50 that will make you pass
Jul 2 2013 4:59PM
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Pancake_Fucker
Posts: 1833 - Karma: 1,880
If you can fill your bladder with excess water faster than your kidneys can process waste than you might have a chance. I got an inconclusive on my screen for work and had to come back later for a test because my piss was way too clear. Then I came back a few days later after drinking a lot but not quite as much water, and I passed.
Jul 2 2013 5:19PM
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Pancake_Fucker
Posts: 1833 - Karma: 1,880
Sorry for double posting but i should also say that some inconclusive tests or too many inconclusives are fails some places. I also have a very high metabolism, very low fat percentage and I am very active. I guess I am at a genetic advantage for smoking weed.
Jul 2 2013 5:26PM
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seward
Posts: 5233 - Karma: 2,174
haha, drug test.

move to canada braa
Jul 2 2013 5:31PM
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cameron_taylor
Posts: 325 - Karma: 446
I dislike you because of this statement.
Jul 2 2013 5:32PM
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Dingo69
Posts: 1330 - Karma: -171
Me too
Jul 2 2013 5:35PM
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SamMcChesney
Posts: 2905 - Karma: 2,198
OIL CHANGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jul 2 2013 5:43PM
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