Member of the Month

PartyBullshiit
March, 2024

Online

Welcome to the Newschoolers forums! You may read the forums as a guest, however you must be a registered member to post. Register to become a member today!

Shitting on the job.

profile picture
Mr.Sloth
Posts: 5091 - Karma: 13,469
I'm doing it.
Oct 22 2012 5:49PM
0 0
profile picture
MNS
Posts: 5386 - Karma: 3,241
You need that poo pay app that tells u how much money you've earned pooping
Oct 22 2012 5:50PM
0 0
profile picture
Puns
Posts: 2052 - Karma: 429
was it a one wipe? those rock.
Oct 22 2012 5:53PM
0 0
profile picture
Mr.Sloth
Posts: 5091 - Karma: 13,469
Yeah. It was a solid shit, man. Solid.
Oct 22 2012 5:58PM
0 0
profile picture
volvotom
Posts: 2045 - Karma: 712
When I worked EMS 911 my biggest fear was always getting a call while in the middle of a shit. Made it 3 years without it happening, but my last day it finally happened. Nothing more uncomfortable than not getting to finish a shit.
Oct 22 2012 6:05PM
0 0
profile picture
crab_pretzel
Posts: 3919 - Karma: 622
i see what you did there
Oct 22 2012 6:06PM
0 0
profile picture
Dr.Gonzo
Posts: 2552 - Karma: 87
Was it you last day because of this accident?
Oct 22 2012 6:10PM
0 0
profile picture
volvotom
Posts: 2045 - Karma: 712
merely coincidence
Oct 22 2012 6:11PM
0 0
profile picture
Dr.Gonzo
Posts: 2552 - Karma: 87
alright, because that would be a pretty shitty way to get fired (pun intended, im hilarious)
Oct 22 2012 6:13PM
0 0
profile picture
volvotom
Posts: 2045 - Karma: 712
I suppose there are probably laws against discrimination for medical ailments. I could sue them for profiling against my uncontrollable constipation.
Oct 22 2012 6:18PM
0 0
profile picture
pjbackwoods
Posts: 1396 - Karma: 420
I feel like i always do it at work and never at home. #justme?
Oct 22 2012 6:20PM
0 0
profile picture
Mr.Sloth
Posts: 5091 - Karma: 13,469
No. You have evolved to a superior species that only shits at work
Oct 22 2012 6:23PM
0 0
profile picture
ORDEAL
Posts: 6386 - Karma: 75
how much do you think it weighed
Oct 22 2012 6:24PM
0 0
profile picture
theBearJew
Posts: 10951 - Karma: 15,633
I poop at work all the time. Its the best, but the toilet paper is always shitty.
Oct 22 2012 6:25PM
0 0
profile picture
Barefootin_Fiend
Posts: 7618 - Karma: 4,727
no, I always shit at work, and very rarely at home. the exception of course being on weekends when i don't work.

i enjoy shitting at work for several reasons...

#1 we have super flushing toilets. no matter how large the deuce, nor how much TP i use, there is just no clogging those fuckers. i'm half scared i'm going to get sucked down with it when i flush. fucking love industrial strength flushing. and i hate, hate, hate plunging, so it works out quite well.

#2 I get paid for it!! need i say more?

Oct 22 2012 6:27PM
0 0
profile picture
.Hugo.
Posts: 17360 - Karma: 28,469
I only poop at home. Even if I am gone for 3 or 4 days I wont poop the entire time.
Oct 22 2012 6:27PM
0 0
profile picture
prosnurfer
Posts: 1842 - Karma: 83

i avoid shitting at my place of work at all costs! i work with a bunch of seriously fat people in a clean room fixing lasers, so there are only 3 bathrooms to choose from on the line and there fucked up.

you walk in and all the toilets have shit in them and theyv been shit in all day and night 24/7 365 by some seriously fucked up fat people. old guys are jearkin off in the stalls too im sure.

but sometimes i absolutly have to use them and the toilet paper is so bad that i bleed from my ass no joke. i sometimes go to mcdonnalds to shit on my break bc its nicer in there. 

 once for a month or 2 my ass was so toren up bc i was broke and was taking the tp from work to use and after 2 wipes ur gettin a lil blood.

Oct 22 2012 6:27PM
0 0
profile picture
BieberHole69
Posts: 1374 - Karma: 2,714
Pun intended?

Everyone should own the Pricy Poop phone app. I've raked in $4.25 between two dumps. Gettin' paid and showing them who's boss.
Oct 22 2012 6:30PM
0 0
profile picture
Negro_Jesus
Posts: 1789 - Karma: 91
I do this too. except i will poop at work.
Oct 22 2012 6:33PM
0 0
profile picture
ORDEAL
Posts: 6386 - Karma: 75
tight fucking butthole username
Oct 22 2012 6:36PM
0 0
profile picture
Port.
Posts: 233 - Karma: 228
Doing the same cheers!
Oct 22 2012 6:39PM
0 0
profile picture
trettzilla
Posts: 931 - Karma: 29
I'm the same way!
Oct 22 2012 6:41PM
0 0
profile picture
skiminnesota
Posts: 9093 - Karma: 429
poop salary is the greatest thing ever.

made just over $200 this summer on the shitter.
Oct 22 2012 7:46PM
0 0
profile picture
Straightthuggin
Posts: 548 - Karma: 26

lost it

Oct 22 2012 8:11PM
0 0
profile picture
TheClap.
Posts: 21649 - Karma: 4,013
best fucking feeling
Oct 22 2012 8:13PM
0 0
profile picture
SSteezle
Posts: 9221 - Karma: 9,939
this. if you're getting paid to take a shit you're doing something right. I always try and hold my shits till I get to work
Oct 22 2012 8:15PM
0 0
profile picture
colin13
Posts: 2201 - Karma: 216
Sometimes I'll get on an electric scale before and after a big one. It's oddly amusing to know how much your shit weighs.
Oct 22 2012 8:15PM
0 0
profile picture
SSteezle
Posts: 9221 - Karma: 9,939
i do this
Oct 22 2012 8:16PM
0 0
profile picture
no_steeze
Posts: 23992 - Karma: 4,270
i got paid when i pooped this summer so i can now say that i have been paid to shit
Oct 22 2012 8:18PM
0 0
profile picture
Spinoza
Posts: 12763 - Karma: 3,844
When I'm working in the summer I need to go to Tim Hortons or McDonalds to go. i usually pretend to look at the menu for a bit before i leave or go in so they dont realize what im doingt
Oct 22 2012 8:36PM
0 0
All times are Eastern (-4)