You have to see this.
These guys are making Republican Ketchup:
'A Tough Choice
Choose Heinz and you're supporting Teresa Heinz and her liberal causes, such as Kerry for President.
Choose W Ketchup and you support the Freedom Alliance Scholarship Fund, which provides scholarships to the children of our brave heroes who have fallen in battle.'
I thought this was a joke. But NO. Republicans don't joke.
For the record, Teresa Heinz only owns 4% of Heinz ketchup.
Warning: If you are reading this then this warning is for you. Every word you read of this useless fine print is another second off your life. Don't you have other things to do? Is your life so empty that you honestly can't think of a better way to spend these moments? Or are you so impressed with authority that you give respect and credence to all who claim it? Do you read everything you're supposed to read? Do you think everything you're supposed to think? Buy what you're told you should want? Get out of your apartment. Meet a member of the opposite sex (or same sex if you prefer). Stop the excessive shopping and masturbation. Quit your job. Start a fight. Prove you're alive. If you don't claim your humanity you will become a statistic.
You have been warnedâ€¦