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Shop Employees: Stupid things customers have asked/said to you

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JayDope
Posts: 6842 - Karma: 408
I searched barred there is a similar thread about ppl who work in retail, here is one for ski shop employees. Here is my story from this past week:

So im renting this kid some skis, i ask him to take off his shoes to measure his foot, the first thing that comes out of his mouth is "Hey do u guys sell lawnmowers here?" I looked at him stunned and said "are u serious?" he replied with "yeah, outdoor store" I looked at him again, and said "No, we just sell ski and snowboard gear" And i continued on with my routine. WHAT An idiot!

Today i was hanging out in the Snowboard section and this woman was looking to buy her daughter some boots, so she asks my co-worker about boots, and he explained to her there are different types for entry level riders etc, she looks on the wall and noticed the snowboard bindings, and she said "Oh, are those like snowboard sandals instead of boots?" we just explained to her that those are the snowboard bindings that the boots go into that connect to the snowboard....i really was in disbelief

alright shop employees, share ur stores here
Oct 11 2009 12:22AM
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TOAST.
Posts: 7265 - Karma: 33,275

Lady: My boots dont fit
Me: Did you take off your shoes
Her: No because I dont want someone to steal them

Oct 29 2009 3:56PM
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alex_uk
Posts: 812 - Karma: 10
Working in a cinema:
"Hi, a large cockporn please"
me *stifling laughter* "sweet or salted?"
"Did I just ask for cockporn?"
"'Fraid so"
Oct 29 2009 6:01PM
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chicken
Posts: 6843 - Karma: 2,122
I can tell if a boot is too tight before I buckle and flex. It can speed up the process.
Oct 29 2009 6:10PM
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joshua
Posts: 5046 - Karma: 1,280
This is the best story yet
Oct 29 2009 6:12PM
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Zoro
Posts: 1253 - Karma: 37

some of these are so funny.  my threads

Oct 29 2009 6:38PM
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Slinger1x1
Posts: 8853 - Karma: 65
i peed a little
Oct 29 2009 7:40PM
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TheStamos
Posts: 9311 - Karma: 910
I worked at porters in Tahoe city and some guy wanted us to cut the tails of his nordica blowers because he said they slowed him down.
Oct 29 2009 7:53PM
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Moses
Posts: 1849 - Karma: 564
hahaha could you maybe post more of these?
Oct 29 2009 8:17PM
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Waldo-
Posts: 1026 - Karma: 184
do u work at les moise?
Oct 29 2009 9:20PM
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GnarBurger
Posts: 3215 - Karma: 43
i work at a skate shop and the stupidest thing i think i have ever heard is "do you carry trucks with shocks?"



........the answer is "no"
Oct 29 2009 9:33PM
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JayDope
Posts: 6842 - Karma: 408
but when i measure their foot, and put them in the correct size i know how to fit a person in boots
Oct 29 2009 9:33PM
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Contender
Posts: 3318 - Karma: 231
My threads for later

I work at staples so here we go

-Is Staples and Business Depot the same thing? (yes)
-Do you sell staples?
-Guy approaches me when im at the furniture pad (desks and chairs EVERYWHERE), where can i find your desks?
-We have a huge binder wall near the back of the store, lining 3/4 of the wall, im in the middle stocking them and guy comes up and says that he's been all over the store and cant find the binders...

last but not least:

Staples sells kits on how to file for divorce, make your own will, etc. stuff like that.  Lady comes in WITH her husband and i can tell she's not in the best of moods:

Lady: Hey, where can I find your divorce kits?

Me: Right over here ma'am, just follow me

Lady: Cmon *insert name here* lets gets this done
*After leading them to where they were stacked*
Me: Okay miss, this is all of them.  *As I walk away*
Lady: Okay *name* help me pick one and get this done fast


I held in my laugh til i got to the back.
Oct 29 2009 10:31PM
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.Emerson.
Posts: 1548 - Karma: 16
sig'd
Oct 29 2009 11:49PM
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birdshake
Posts: 1228 - Karma: 71
probably asking for seismic trucks
Click for larger image

fortunately never worked retail but Im a courier and we have a next day service meaning pick up today deliver tomorrow and about 10% of people think it means pick up tomorrow so I get to the place and its never ready.
Oct 30 2009 1:03AM
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[Dawn
Posts: 1718 - Karma: 69
"hi can i have free die-cuts"

i kid you not.
Oct 30 2009 1:05AM
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123ski
Posts: 7374 - Karma: 1,415
You could almost make a thread about stupid things shop employees have said to me, as a customer.  Some of those dudes have no clue..
Oct 30 2009 1:32AM
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dbotski
Posts: 61 - Karma: 60
Phone call:
Exscuse me, im so embarassed to ask this but i was just having a problem.  Im inside wearing my skis, and i was wondering how to get out of the bindings?"
Oct 30 2009 1:40AM
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B-runge
Posts: 16558 - Karma: 360
post some up

i hate it when they are wrong and you wanna correct them
but cant
Oct 30 2009 1:51AM
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123ski
Posts: 7374 - Karma: 1,415
just do correct them.

Oct 30 2009 1:59AM
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ski-swagga
Posts: 5276 - Karma: 219
my threads
Oct 30 2009 2:02AM
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Jesus-FlwrSubaru
Posts: 1077 - Karma: 53
I work at a tune shop and right as i walk in to work from skiing, there's this guy waiting to talk to me. Big time realtor in my area. He tells me how he used to get hooked up from the previous tuner and wants me to do the same. I tell him we can't do anything for him right now but something could get worked out. He brings in 3 pairs of skis to get tuned with the bases looking like swiss cheese. I repeated myself and told him to comeback later and speak with my boss. He insists on a hookup. So I told him to fill out paperwork on what he would like done and get his info so I can speak with my boss, a fellow worker asks him the same thing, TO FILL OUT PAPER WORK. He does not do that either. So i take the equipment down to the tune area and set it on the corner for me to work on it later. My boss comes in and starts tuning skis with me. I told him the situation and he continues to tune them. So at the end of the night, we end up writing a $300 tab for this dude. The next day i come back from skiing and find him talking with my boss. Basically he was trying to blame me for tuning the skis and that i promised him a hookup. I told him I would talk with my boss and for him to leave some info along with telling him we don't do anything like what he wanted. So we end up comping one of the tunes which brought the price down to $180 and we ask him to pay for the labor at least. He gets angry at us, so we tell him to put it on a card because he kept saying "This is Going to kill me". So he pays, loads his skis into his idling Mercedez, grabs his Cashmere Burberry coat, gloves and scarf set up and drives off
Oct 30 2009 2:30AM
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yuck
Posts: 8384 - Karma: 2,090
i work at a grocery store and a guy came up to me, fucked outta his mind and asked where the oatmeal was. I showed him, then he asked me where the oatmeal was that came in little packages, that makes one bowl. so i said they were inside all the boxes. then he asked "so you mean, there are little bags of oatmeal inside those boxes?"

it was the ultimate facepalm.
Oct 30 2009 10:51AM
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JayDope
Posts: 6842 - Karma: 408
zo this guy comes in the shop a couple days ago, and im talkign to him, and he asks about the volkl tigershark skis for this year, because he has last years and the year before. So i tell him the differences between the 10ft and 8ft ski(names of the skis) and he explains how he like to get a new pair every 30 or so days on them. Which seems outrageous to me because these are upwards of 1000$ dollar ski. His main reason was because he hates having last years equipment......
Nov 13 2009 11:32AM
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factory81
Posts: 3967 - Karma: 63
I  dont have time to sit and listen to all of these at work. Most of them are boring, some are a little more interesting.

The top notch ones get saved though, the ones we care enough about I guess.
Nov 13 2009 12:10PM
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I_Am_Mod
Posts: 13214 - Karma: 3,753
yeah, some years ago, when twintips were like the newest thing, i was in this one shop, checking out the new twintips when an employee finds it necessary to explain the ski to me.
He claimed that the rear tip was for setting in your turns more effective (this is just a side-effect), when i told him: no, its for riding backwards he just laughed at me and said, why would one want to do that?! i just left the store....
Nov 13 2009 12:23PM
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frontline31
Posts: 158 - Karma: 15

Stupid questions are fine and understandable, but probably the worst thing is when people find some outerwear, bring it to the till without trying it on, and you KNOW it's coming back the next day to be returned.

Or when people say "I found this same thing on the internet for 60 bucks less, whats up with that?"

Or  "What kind of deal can you give me on this one buddy? *wink wink*"

Oh, you mean on that brand new Park Pickle that we just received this morning? NOTHING.

Dec 15 2009 1:01PM
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JayDope
Posts: 6842 - Karma: 408
a little background info on our shop, we used to sell bikes in the offseason about 3 years ago, and now we no longer do, and our shop is called Ski Barn.
woman calls the other day i answer the phone convo goes like this
Me: " ski barn in wayne, this is jay how can i help u?"
Lady: "Hi is this ski barn?"
Me: "Yes it is"
Lady: "oh ok, do u just sell bikes, or do u sell ski equipment too?"
Me: "Well we stopped selling bikes and yes, we do sell ski equipment"
Lady: "oh ok great, do u sell kids ski goggles?"
Me: "Yes we do"
Lady: "Ok great, thanks"
Me; "ur welcome take care"

fucking retarded people calling, i just wanted to strangle that woman through the phone, asking the dumbest question. Like why wouldnt we sell ski equipment? we are called ski barn
Dec 28 2009 10:49AM
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gorillasteeze720
Posts: 190 - Karma: 9
dont work at  shop but when i was delivering beer to a liquor store

Fat lady standing in front of strictly Bud and Bud Light cooler door:
"Excuse me wheres the Budweiser"
Me: " No clue im just delivering it"

Dec 28 2009 1:35PM
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Justo8484
Posts: 3905 - Karma: 204
this happened yesterday. we have a phone tree for customers to call directly to different parts of the store, extension 7 being the warming hut ski shop. i pick up the phone, get on with the usual pleasantries, and the lady asks if we sell ski pants. i told her yes, and that was that.
Dec 28 2009 1:52PM
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ChipSki
Posts: 327 - Karma: 34
Haha, i used to get that when i worked in a pizza shop. Except instead of being "How big is your footlong" It was "how big is a 14 inch pizza". Some people just don't think
Dec 28 2009 5:04PM
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OhMyBosh
Posts: 5056 - Karma: 170
you sound like a huge cunt. that is a perfectly respectable question to ask. she asked if you sell kids ski goggles... how the fuck would she know what you guys sell... might as well call and ask a simple question rather than drive all the way down there and find out you dont have what they want.


Dec 28 2009 5:29PM
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Mailbox
Posts: 109 - Karma: 10
Not just ski shop related but when people call

"Hello, Ski shop."
"Hey, are you guys open?"
.....
Dec 29 2009 12:24AM
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JayDope
Posts: 6842 - Karma: 408
every ski shop ive been to has sold ski goggles u fuckin moron. jesus, r u smokin some laced shit again?
Jan 14 2010 2:26AM
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masta_LE3B
Posts: 3397 - Karma: 62
to be fair, i dout the lady on the line has been to that many ski shops. and kid goggles arnt super common.
Jan 14 2010 3:46AM
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7-11_Slurpee
Posts: 1142 - Karma: 1,552

Bump Worthy Thread

I started working at a bike shop and i've already heard a ton of funny things.

-I can get wd40 for sooo much cheaper than this chain lube
- (father talking to son) The road bike seats are skinnier so you can turn with your legs when riding with no handlbars.
 I can't think of many more right now.

Jun 23 2010 2:58PM
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joshua
Posts: 5046 - Karma: 1,280
That one is not to bad, what if you are just working in the back after store hours?
Jun 23 2010 4:06PM
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The-Pencil-Man
Posts: 388 - Karma: 10
inb4 page 20
THREADS
Jun 23 2010 4:17PM
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Laurent.
Posts: 10054 - Karma: 25,277
This thread needs a bump


I don't have a job but a friend of mine works at a big sports shop and in the winter they sell skis, I sometimes come there to chill and what I've seen...oh dear.

My friend was busy bringing some stuff to the storage room when a customer asked for ski-boots, he said: "1 minute sir". But instead of waiting politley for my friend to return the customer grabbed a huge pair of Nordica's of the rack and was trying to get his foot whilst wearing sneakers.

I was looking in disbelief, when my friend returned and he said you are supposed to take your shoes of against the guy. But the guy said: "He kid I've been skiing for over 30 year and I was teached by pros so who do you think knows it better you or me with my 30 year pro experience?"

I couldn't stop laughing.
And on another day we had a guy who bought some carve skis and bindings and we asked if we should mount it for him (only 10 euros and he just bought 900 euro skis) and he said: "No that's a rip-off I will do it myself."

The next day he came in with a ski that looked like Swiss cheese and he asked if the shop could mount it. My friends answer was of course a no.
And I often see 40/50+ year olds who think they look good in a retinae burning Protest jackets and pants.
Jul 18 2010 5:06AM
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Rolfe
Posts: 357 - Karma: 20
My threads for later
Jul 18 2010 11:06AM
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SteezeBall
Posts: 350 - Karma: 12
This is bullshit. That was epic

Jul 18 2010 11:27AM
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jeR.
Posts: 1325 - Karma: 58
i work at a general store in a pretty small and town and this one insane women always comes in to ask me questions. heres something from thursday evening.

lady: "hey are these lemons good? (she has one bruised one and one good one)

Me: no that one has a bruise on it, i will get you another one

lady: how many lemons is enough to feed my family (and she goes on to list the names like I know who she's talking about

me: i really dont know, im sorry

lady: you don't know anything (she goes to yell at my boss, who already knows this women is a freak)

she comes back, i ring her up the 79 cents for the lemons

lady: this lemon isnt good, why did you give me this one. (referring to the bruised one, she's pretty angry at this, raising her voice, all the while a huge line is accumulating behind her and people are shaking their heads.)

me: sorry but you grabbed it from the aisle yourself im just the cashier

lady: ok just give me a receipt, then. (snarls)

me: i give her the receipt straight from the register and she sees me do this

lady: what is this? this is too small i want a real receipt. (she's livid now)

me: i try to explain to her that this is what a receipt looks like from this store, she has none of it

lady: i need to get paid back for these lemons (79 cents) and i need a real receipt to show my proof of purchase.

me: i say fine and i take a piece of paper and proceed to hand write a receipt for her in extra large font. i underline the total in red, and i list everything she bought.

its been about ten minutes since she's been at the front of the register, the line is huge behind her and im really trying to get her out so i can ring other people up.

the lady gives me a lecture about being good to customers, etc, and not choosing bad lemons for them even though she chose them herself. she leaves the store and forgets the receipt i wrote up for her.

shes a crazy insane bitch who really should not be allowed in stores by herself. she comes in like every few days and fails to recognize me each time.
Jul 18 2010 12:40PM
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.Roockley.
Posts: 3857 - Karma: 4,000
i'm in a shop working at the moment and have already had some stupid questions, i think it will be one of those days

gypsy 'do you sell ed hardy?'
me 'no'
gypsy 'do you sell ed hardy hats?'
me 'nope'
gypsy 'do you make ed hardy hats?'
me 'we do not have ed hardy'
gypsy 'this shop sucks'
me 'thanks, see ya, by the way, put the monster hat back'

put it back and ran off haha



'do you sell rockstar hoodies?'
me 'yeah, here is a collab one with rockstar and fox'
customer 'oh i dont like white, do you have any blank hoodies with no colours on made by rockstar, my boyfriend said i could buy them online'
me 'yeah you probably can'

i dont think she realised we are a shop


more coming soon probably
Aug 29 2010 9:21AM
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grilledsteezeyo
Posts: 1419 - Karma: 72
hahahah threads
Aug 29 2010 10:40AM
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TOAST.
Posts: 7265 - Karma: 33,275
Something like that happened to me, but the person didn't have 30 years experience so the listened to me. I could still not believe that they thought their shoe went inside the boot.
Aug 29 2010 10:55AM
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Oh_So_Hyphy
Posts: 870 - Karma: 15
I dont work in a rentals shop but i spend alot of time in there because my friends work there. So one night kinda slow a russian guy walks in to get fitted for skis. He starts talking about how hes an expert skier and my friend asks him "Since you been sking along time, what do you want you dins to be set at" The guy stands there looks at the ski binding and says 12. Im just sitting like lolwut. About 30 mins later i see the same guy coming down the hill hunched over looking like hes never skied before. i then see him continue to fall down the rest of the hill with his skis still on. He walks in and says" Man i just fell and my skis didnt even come off i could have got hurt" Expert Skier for you.
Aug 29 2010 11:09AM
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TOAST.
Posts: 7265 - Karma: 33,275
And apparently I posted it in this thread back in October.

Anyways older people who think that you have no idea what you are talking about because you are younger them are the worst.
Aug 29 2010 11:17AM
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.JPolster
Posts: 782 - Karma: 17
Can i use your phone so my dealer can meet me in the back alley......
Aug 29 2010 12:48PM
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Oh_So_Hyphy
Posts: 870 - Karma: 15
this thread was super funny so i shall bump it
Aug 29 2010 5:43PM
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JayDope
Posts: 6842 - Karma: 408
ur friend asked the guy what he wanted his din set at? thats illegal i believe, any shop has to go by the DIN chart, goes by age height weight and skier type, ur shop sounds sketchy as fuck, no offense
Aug 29 2010 6:08PM
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p.hawks
Posts: 2832 - Karma: 581
they use this as a base, but you can ask them to go higher or lower. its jsut liek getting them mounted and then asking for them to turn them up for you
Aug 29 2010 6:43PM
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