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To simply purchase, roll and smoke marijuana is not enough for white people. They need to make sure they know all the different strains, cultivation technique, and methods for smoking it. They even have an entire magazine devoted those where they actually have centerfolds of plants that people have grown.
White people are also willing to spend over $500 on smoking devices just to find new and more expensive ways to smoke weed.
It is worth noting that at every white person, at some point, has written a high school or college paper about the history of how the DuPont industry helped make weed illegal. This paper also teaches them about how hemp can be used to fuel cars, make clothing, create food, cure cancer, and solve every single problem on earth
While you would assume that most white people smoke weed between 14-28 (and act as though they are the first generation to do so), the reality is that white people smoke weed well into old age. They also smoke weed with their kids! This is not a joke. White people love weed so much that they consider it a ‘gift’ to share with their kids. Leading to a generation that was not allowed to watch Power Rangers, but was allowed to toke up.
All white people believe marijuana should be legalized, and they consider the Netherlands to a pinnacle of enlightenment. Also, every white person has had their most profound weed smoking experience in Amsterdam, so it’s a good idea to fabricate a story about your own experience there so you can quickly forge a bond. Traditional tales uses the following words: hostel, brownie, girl/guy from Hungary, crazy, locked out, chill dudes from Ireland.
Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES should ever imply that people just smoke weed to get high, they do it for medical/spiritual/social reasons, etc, or that there are any negative consequences. This will likely alienate you from white people.
On the plus side, white people are always looking for higher quality, more potent, more organic marijuana. If you promise to hook them up with a special selection from your home country, they will likely pay a high premium.
If you live in, or have even visited the pacific NW (more specifically portland) you would see that the list describes the people there perfectly.i would imagine it does a fair job for most of the NE also.
On March 17th, however, this exact same activity is called celebrating St. Patrick’s day. This very special white holiday recognizes Saint Patrick, the patron saint of Ireland who helped to bring Catholicism to the Emerald Isle. His ascetic life is celebrated every year by white people drinking large amounts of Irish-themed alcohol and listening to the Dropkick Murphys.
For example, if you are watching TV with white people and there is a piece on the news about that they do not agree with, they are likely to declare “ok, that’s it, I’m moving to Canada.”
Though they will never actually move to Canada, the act of declaring that they are willing to undertake the journey is very symbolic in white culture. It shows that their dedication to their lifestyle and beliefs are so strong, that they would consider packing up their entire lives and moving to a country that is only slightly different to the one they live in now.
Within white culture, it is agreed upon that if Canada had better weather it would be a perfect place.
Being aware that this information can be used quite easily to gain the trust of white people. Whenever they say, “I’m moving to Canada,” you must immediately respond with “I have relatives in Canada.”
They will then expect you to tell them about how Canada has a perfect healthcare system, legalized everything, and no crime. Though not true, it will reassure them that they are making the right choice by saying they want to move there.
But be warned, they will reference you in future conversations and possibly call on you to settle disputes about Canadian tax rates. So use this advice only if you plan to do some basic research.
Note: Canadian white people threaten to move to Europe.
Note: Europeans are unable to threaten to move anywhere.