Member of the Month

PartyBullshiit
March, 2024

Online

Welcome to the Newschoolers forums! You may read the forums as a guest, however you must be a registered member to post. Register to become a member today!

wiping your ass.

profile picture
ductapeboy
Posts: 3328 - Karma: 11
k so.... I was taking a shit the other day - and I have gotten too lazy to close the door lately... so my gf is standing there... and she looks in the door and I'm wiping my ass... and she is like - what the hell are you doing? and I'm like - I'm wiping my ass.... and she is like - why are you still sitting down. and I was like - cuz thats how you wipe your ass. and so she was like - I wipe my ass standing up. and I was like - you what? so yea I was wondering who the freak was. me - the sitter, or my girlfriend - the stander?


Dave Pauls
www.corbettsskishop.com

I like dead kittens.
May 25 2003 12:07AM
0 0
profile picture
CTripper
Posts: 6520 - Karma: 20
standing up? what the hell???
-chris
May 25 2003 12:08AM
0 0
profile picture
mauii
Posts: 6166 - Karma: 32
your the freak dave. How the hell do you wipe your ass sitting down?

-Mike

Viva La Resistance!
May 25 2003 12:12AM
0 0
profile picture
BrodyLeven
Posts: 7016 - Karma: 187
girls only go in the bathroom to get pretty and fix makeup


Brody
i wont drop out of high school for skiing, mom
May 25 2003 12:13AM
0 0
profile picture
roxysister360
Posts: 1063 - Karma: 10
yeah...ur the freak. how can u do it sitting down?
*******************
My imaginary friend thinks you have serious mental problems.

'Life is a stage on which everyone contributes a verse...what will your verse be?' -Robin Williams in 'The Dead Poets Society'
May 25 2003 12:14AM
0 0
profile picture
Jailbait
Posts: 349 - Karma: 10
that was SO not needed dave

'You always wanna be told you're right...but maybe I got sick of lying all the time'
May 25 2003 12:16AM
0 0
profile picture
vegabond
Posts: 1235 - Karma: 11
its ptrtty simple, just reach, and wipe. how could u stand up and do it? you ass cheecks would squeeeeze together and you would get like a buildup and have to squeeze the paper between the cheeks to whipe. its not rite.

Moe.
-
Pimps don't pay taxes.
-
613
May 25 2003 12:17AM
0 0
profile picture
QuazBotch
Posts: 3908 - Karma: 216
you can wipe only wipe your ass sitting down if your ass doesn't cover the entire toilet seat - you need enough room for your arm to get down there in the bowl to reach your assy-ass part.

if you have a fat ass you have to sit real far forwards on the seat, or stand up to wipe.
May 25 2003 12:29AM
0 0
profile picture
rsd
Posts: 1236 - Karma: 10
I AGREE WITH DJXTREME
jk yeah thats retarded

-Ryan
May 25 2003 12:30AM
0 0
profile picture
l_KeViN_l
Posts: 2108 - Karma: 16
man sitting down all the way.. why stand up?

-----------------------------------------------------------
'I say don't drink and drive - you might spill your drink' - NOFX
'Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time.'
May 25 2003 12:30AM
0 0
profile picture
C.Royce
Posts: 1031 - Karma: 187
hahahahaha standing up
May 25 2003 12:34AM
0 0
profile picture
CalgaryJibber
Posts: 1828 - Karma: 19
please consider- girls have vaginas, so whiping back 2 front can run a risk of vaginal cavity infection, its easier front to back when standing- Dr. Whipes
'moseley kicks ass, you guys are just jealous of his money and all the hot chicks he gets and his hair...beautiful hair, so soft, oohhhh'-alpentalik

skiing with sunglasses is extrememly gay! but skiing with sun glasses on and goggles on your head is straight.'- Alpentalik

I swear to follow the teachings of JMMT

'say everyone under 16 cannot particapate in the forum conversation

and they can have their own forum called peewees daycare.
where they can talk about nintendos and shitting the bed' -seward
May 25 2003 12:36AM
0 0
profile picture
KoBEN
Posts: 283 - Karma: 12
FUCKED UP!!!! i wipe my ass laying down, then to the biday
May 25 2003 12:41AM
0 0
profile picture
CalgaryJibber
Posts: 1828 - Karma: 19
word
'moseley kicks ass, you guys are just jealous of his money and all the hot chicks he gets and his hair...beautiful hair, so soft, oohhhh'-alpentalik

skiing with sunglasses is extrememly gay! but skiing with sun glasses on and goggles on your head is straight.'- Alpentalik

I swear to follow the teachings of JMMT

'say everyone under 16 cannot particapate in the forum conversation

and they can have their own forum called peewees daycare.
where they can talk about nintendos and shitting the bed' -seward
May 25 2003 12:43AM
0 0
profile picture
Capurnicus
Posts: 9947 - Karma: 1,886
both

Patrick
patproductions.com
SMS Session 1
May 25 2003 12:43AM
0 0
profile picture
skier_boy26
Posts: 11295 - Karma: 502
public toilet seats can be scary depending on where they are, so then i would stand, otherwise i sit cause its better
-Grant

bye el niño
May 25 2003 12:43AM
0 0
profile picture
SaraJ
Posts: 366 - Karma: 52
I've never thought about it. But i guess I kinda squat when i whipe, so neither really....

-Sara

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*
Member of the OTC!

Skiing is not for the simple minded, that's why they invented the snowboard.

skihood.com
May 25 2003 1:24AM
0 0
profile picture
Ds91260
Posts: 9984 - Karma: 19
sitting and standing varies on the size of the bowl, my house for instance has the 3 gallon bowl, the kind they dont make ne more, but everywhere else has the 1.7 gallon bowl, so that can be tricky, but the real question is, when u wipe ur ass, do u FOLD or WHAD?
----------------------------------

'i was grinding with this one guy at a gay bar called 'From Behind' and he had a huge boner' - Lateralis the great

'i knew a kid at 12 who didnt know how to masturbate, until i showed him el porno' - petek

Newschool Underground, cleanin up NS, one bitch at a time

**NEWSCHOOL UNDERGROUND**
May 25 2003 1:28AM
0 0
profile picture
SaraJ
Posts: 366 - Karma: 52
who takes the time to fold it? I crinkle it up and shoot baskets.

-Sara

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*
Member of the OTC!

Skiing is not for the simple minded, that's why they invented the snowboard.

skihood.com
May 25 2003 1:31AM
0 0
profile picture
edmonton_skier
Posts: 3210 - Karma: 110
no i just take the whole roll for one wipe
May 25 2003 1:32AM
0 0
profile picture
roxysister360
Posts: 1063 - Karma: 10
whad
********************
My imaginary friend thinks you have serious mental problems.

'Life is a stage on which everyone contributes a verse...what will your verse be?' -Robin Williams in 'The Dead Poets Society'

'All generalizations are false.' -Anonymous
May 25 2003 1:33AM
0 0
profile picture
vegabond
Posts: 1235 - Karma: 11
i prefer not to whipe.

Moe.
-
Pimps don't pay taxes.
-
613
May 25 2003 1:37AM
0 0
profile picture
Ds91260
Posts: 9984 - Karma: 19
nice
----------------------------------

'i was grinding with this one guy at a gay bar called 'From Behind' and he had a huge boner' - Lateralis the great

'i knew a kid at 12 who didnt know how to masturbate, until i showed him el porno' - petek

Newschool Underground, cleanin up NS, one bitch at a time

**NEWSCHOOL UNDERGROUND**
May 25 2003 1:56AM
0 0
profile picture
Lateralis
Posts: 1228 - Karma: 331
how the fuck can you wipe sitting down man????


President of the OTC!

Everybody, Lateralis drinks alcohol and smokes marijuana cigarettes. You're burned now, Lateralis! - halo

'ive been shavin since i was in 5th grade, yea the girls made fun of me then, but now they grovel at my feet just to pet me' - Alex aka Ds91260

**NEWSCHOOL UNDERGROUND**
May 25 2003 3:19AM
0 0
profile picture
weazelzb
Posts: 4454 - Karma: 12
ya man sitting down!?!?!


jigga say wha??
May 25 2003 11:55AM
0 0
profile picture
Bob_Loblaw
Posts: 8384 - Karma: 38
i do it sitting down. Standing up? What the hell is that?

Anyway, i just lean over to one side like I'm about to fart and just wipe. It's so much better that way.
----------------
God is a concept by which we measure our pain - John Lennon

Listen to Bob Marley

Life is a waste of time and time is a waste of life. So get wasted all the time and have the time of your life!
May 25 2003 12:16PM
0 0
profile picture
mikee
Posts: 7813 - Karma: 5
If you sit doesnt your hand like touch all the nasty water and shit? Thats a risk Im not willing to take although ill try it next time. ANd haha I fold over twice creating a 3 layer piece.

-MiKeE LiFsHiTz-

***NEWSCHOOL UNDERGROUND***
May 25 2003 12:24PM
0 0
profile picture
weazelzb
Posts: 4454 - Karma: 12
sittin down is weeeeiiiiirdddd......


jigga say wha??
May 25 2003 12:26PM
0 0
profile picture
CTripper
Posts: 6520 - Karma: 20
Derek has it down. Standing up is weird. just lean to the side.
-chris
May 25 2003 12:31PM
0 0
profile picture
Bob_Loblaw
Posts: 8384 - Karma: 38
no, you don't stick it down in there. when u lean over, u have a clear shot of your butthole.
----------------
God is a concept by which we measure our pain - John Lennon

Listen to Bob Marley

Life is a waste of time and time is a waste of life. So get wasted all the time and have the time of your life!
May 25 2003 12:32PM
0 0
profile picture
EastCoastPride
Posts: 11654 - Karma: 4,989
Standing is fucked up.


-Teddy
Member of the Being in a Club Club
May 25 2003 1:31PM
0 0
profile picture
snow-bunny
Posts: 571 - Karma: 10
standing up? thats gonna be unconfortable

*~*SUPER BUNNY*~*

slow minded

olives taste good

how can a fat cow get all the way over the moon??
May 25 2003 1:40PM
0 0
profile picture
yeti
Posts: 6335 - Karma: 17
i have NEVER heard of anyone standing up to wipe their ass.



Hey Kids! Sell Crack to Support Newschoolers!
FROSTMONKEY
May 25 2003 1:51PM
0 0
profile picture
Skifree737
Posts: 484 - Karma: 13
standing is easier
--------------------------------------
Ohio represent
May 25 2003 1:55PM
0 0
profile picture
freeskier420
Posts: 519 - Karma: 10
i have sum1 wipe my ass for me
tanner hall is yummy

*newschool baller*

brody ur my dude~ ohio represent
May 25 2003 3:47PM
0 0
profile picture
Tosh
Posts: 3272 - Karma: 673
you are both freaks but i ahve never gerad anyone wipe there ass standing upp thats werid
May 25 2003 5:20PM
0 0
profile picture
bitchassphatz
Posts: 6171 - Karma: 107
dude....it's all about the lean. what the hell is this standing shit. and besides, you have tp, why would you even touch your ass sitting? im sorry, but i think the standing method is for people who were not cordinated enough to wipe their ass without starring at their cheeks. now for the real question:

Who looks after whipping?

----------------------------------------

I ride for that moment when I am hauling through trees, weaving in and out, in chest deep powder, and I can't even open my mouth, or the snow will shoot in the back of my throut, either choking me or quenching my thirst. That's why I ski.
May 25 2003 5:23PM
0 0
profile picture
marlin_102
Posts: 2430 - Karma: 11
if you sit, then you would be putting your hand in the bowl when you wipe..fuckin dirty! u gotta squat, so really neither stand or sit. its all about the 1/2 way in between.
-------------------------------------------------------------------

everyone is entitled to the above opinion.

'the walrus is in the barn' - brad holmes

'the bible is the most shoplifted book in the unted states' - Froggy
May 25 2003 5:33PM
0 0
profile picture
Bob_Loblaw
Posts: 8384 - Karma: 38
u dont put your hand in the bowl. you lean ontto one cheek so the other ones in the air. then your butthole is clear of the bowl and u can wipe dirty-free.

And I look at the tp after wiping. How else u gonna know that it's all gone?
----------------
God is a concept by which we measure our pain - John Lennon

Listen to Bob Marley

Life is a waste of time and time is a waste of life. So get wasted all the time and have the time of your life!
May 25 2003 5:40PM
0 0
profile picture
vegabond
Posts: 1235 - Karma: 11
who dosent remember if they sit or stand? i have to wait till i take a shit

Moe.
-
Pimps don't pay taxes.
-
613
May 25 2003 5:48PM
0 0
profile picture
Ds91260
Posts: 9984 - Karma: 19
i look, im gonna go look right now
----------------------------------

'i was grinding with this one guy at a gay bar called 'From Behind' and he had a huge boner' - Lateralis the great

'i knew a kid at 12 who didnt know how to masturbate, until i showed him el porno' - petek

Newschool Underground, cleanin up NS, one bitch at a time

**NEWSCHOOL UNDERGROUND**
May 25 2003 5:56PM
0 0
profile picture
Ski_Instructor_Mike
Posts: 6146 - Karma: 72
.... standing dude. you're a freak.
-Mike

Dude I was fine before you tried to turn me into a cake - me after ralphing after being antiqued
May 25 2003 5:58PM
0 0
profile picture
Ds91260
Posts: 9984 - Karma: 19
what if u have a super high pressure beday(sp) and it forces u to ur feet
----------------------------------

'i was grinding with this one guy at a gay bar called 'From Behind' and he had a huge boner' - Lateralis the great

'i knew a kid at 12 who didnt know how to masturbate, until i showed him el porno' - petek

Newschool Underground, cleanin up NS, one bitch at a time

**NEWSCHOOL UNDERGROUND**
May 25 2003 5:59PM
0 0
profile picture
Jackpot
Posts: 4243 - Karma: 136
standing up is weird, sitting down is EZ, and more lazy

2 Inchers Club
May 25 2003 6:39PM
0 0
profile picture
seward
Posts: 5233 - Karma: 2,174
all depends on what kinda shit it was

if it was a easy goer then i have the power to stand up.

if it took everything outta me i gotta sit down

sometimes i even flush the toilet while still sitting naked on it, cools everything down.


seward backwards is drawes,blackman term for underwear - Lateralis pointing something out that i have never noticed in my 18 years of existence


What are the cops gonna do, Call the cops? - Good ol Muff
May 25 2003 7:30PM
0 0
profile picture
Nine_Milla_Killa
Posts: 6783 - Karma: 23
She sees you wiping shit from your ass, and the only thing she says is why are you sitting down??? She must be down with the freaky shit!
__________________
NS Naked Club
May 25 2003 7:34PM
0 0
profile picture
Nine_Milla_Killa
Posts: 6783 - Karma: 23
^(no pun intended)
__________________
NS Naked Club
May 25 2003 7:34PM
0 0
profile picture
JayDC7
Posts: 1620 - Karma: 10
haha, i had this argument in school for about 2 weeks this past year. i was surprised and apalled by how many idiots stand up to wipe their ass. like mercer said, its all about the lean. you get maximum wipe-age without waisting precious energy.



- Julian
May 25 2003 7:35PM
0 0
profile picture
timbojones
Posts: 572 - Karma: 10
i dont see how you can do it still sitting on the toilet, i rub against a tree and then run wild with my animal freinds or sometimes it washes away when im in water




Timbo Jones isnt even my real name.
May 25 2003 7:37PM
0 0
profile picture
sherLocke
Posts: 4701 - Karma: 8
shit i stand, ive never even thought of not standing really. and you have to look, to see how much more shit you have on your asshole. if its still wipin away all nasty you gotta keep goin. you cant take a chance of pulling up your pants and having poop chunks on your butt.
peace,paul


'handin out flyers is jus fuckin ridiculous...when you give somebody a flyer its like...say man...why dont you go throw this out for me?'
-mitch hedburg

'is mick nick and mike wilson the same people?'
-//d-lite//
May 25 2003 7:51PM
0 0
profile picture
Ds91260
Posts: 9984 - Karma: 19
baahhhahaahahahahahahahahaahahahahaha, that was some funny shit NMK, no pun intended also
----------------------------------

'i was grinding with this one guy at a gay bar called 'From Behind' and he had a huge boner' - Lateralis the great

'i knew a kid at 12 who didnt know how to masturbate, until i showed him el porno' - petek

Newschool Underground, cleanin up NS, one bitch at a time

**NEWSCHOOL UNDERGROUND**
May 25 2003 8:03PM
0 0
All times are Eastern (-4)