The best gaper quotes - Ski Gabber

PC.Jibber
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Mar 11 2010
11:01:57PM

"look mommy, that guy is skiing backwards!"

"no, that's an optical illusion, skiers can't go backwards"

Yeah cool tricks!!!

willgreenwood
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Mar 12 2010
2:02:52AM

i have a picture on my facebook of me doing a backflip, and it is VERY OBVIOUSLY a backflip and some total gaper comments: what trick are ya pullin? so i told him it was my new double, switch misty 10 to rodeo 9

Apresbang
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Mar 12 2010
7:28:50AM

Quoting willgreenwood from Mar 12 2010 2:02:52:
i have a picture on my facebook of me doing a backflip, and it is VERY OBVIOUSLY a backflip and some total gaper comments: what trick are ya pullin? so i told him it was my new double, switch misty 10 to rodeo 9

Waow seriously? You're so cool!!!! Will you be my friend?

Fuck the calender page and fuck you!

willgreenwood
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Mar 12 2010
11:13:08AM

Quoting Apresbang from Mar 12 2010 7:28:50:
Waow seriously? You're so cool!!!! Will you be my friend?

of course i would love to!

Apresbang
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Mar 12 2010
11:17:31AM

Quoting willgreenwood from Mar 12 2010 11:13:08:
of course i would love to!

Sweet!

Fuck the calender page and fuck you!

backbarvey
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Mar 12 2010
11:48:38AM

Quoting johnsonST from Mar 2 2010 2:28:06:
So in two months of riding SPK kaos boots, I have had only a couple days when some gaper kid hasn't pointed out that I am wearing two different boots. Ski Patrol was even convinced that I needed to get off the mountain and get my equipment figured out. Come on guys.

haha i have the same boots. got them at christmas and people ask about them all the time. sooo stupid. i like to tell people theyre moo cows

NEVER USE THE WORD STOKED....bad people

TOUCHE
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Mar 13 2010
7:51:53PM

Quoting gabe. from Feb 23 2010 9:27:54:
so i was watching an edit of some skiers hitting up some urban in french class, and the kid next to me was like "why are they skiing in the city? that makes no sense!"

Yer i have gotten that one a few times at school

KEEP IT STEEZY

ORAGE TABARNAK

TOUCHE
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Mar 13 2010
9:27:24PM

Quoting Shukovski from Mar 10 2010 6:09:26:
Gaper: DUDE How do you make the tails go bendy like that? I want to do that 2...did you use fire or something?
I just sighed and said yes, lot's and lot's of fire.

And another time a snowboard sprayed me yelling the park is not for skis. He then procceedingly did a straight air over a 15ft jump and ate shit at the (crash)landing. I then did a switch 5 cork and just afterbanged hard.

claim much?

KEEP IT STEEZY

ORAGE TABARNAK

FreeskierRocco.$
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Mar 13 2010
9:40:45PM

Wicked fuckin creeped out from this, but here it is.
So, I was riding the chairlift on a not too busy day, so it was just me and this like 10 year old kid on the quad.

Kid: Do you believe in Ghosts?
Me: Uhhh... not really...
Kid: Well I do

An awkward minute or so passes.

Kid: Can I tell you something?
Me: Yea, sure.
Kid: I can see dead people. I think I'm a medium or something (Keep in mind this kid is like 10)
Me: Well that's pretty cool...
Kid: Yea, but I'm not gonna tell my parents because they might think there is something wrong with me.
Me: Yea, they probably would.

By now I really wanted to get off that chairlift.

Kid: Yea, I can see dead people and every once in awhile I see a floating head.
Me: (chairlift ride is over) Nice talking to you, bye.

And yea I got the fuck outta there.

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Mar 13 2010
10:02:19PM

Quoting FreeskierRocco.$ from Mar 13 2010 9:40:45:
Wicked fuckin creeped out from this, but here it is.
So, I was riding the chairlift on a not too busy day, so it was just me and this like 10 year old kid on the quad.

Kid: Do you believe in Ghosts?
Me: Uhhh... not really...
Kid: Well I do

An awkward minute or so passes.

Kid: Can I tell you something?
Me: Yea, sure.
Kid: I can see dead people. I think I'm a medium or something (Keep in mind this kid is like 10)
Me: Well that's pretty cool...
Kid: Yea, but I'm not gonna tell my parents because they might think there is something wrong with me.
Me: Yea, they probably would.

By now I really wanted to get off that chairlift.

Kid: Yea, I can see dead people and every once in awhile I see a floating head.
Me: (chairlift ride is over) Nice talking to you, bye.

And yea I got the fuck outta there.

Must have been too high to jump. lol

It all started last night when I was totally plastered.I woke up in a dumpster with some lube and a hamster.I found myself in a very strange place. my head really hurt and things drawn on my face. Dont remember a thing cause I blacked out in a hurry, but ive gotta get to cllass, I mean my friends are all worries. "Hey Vin" hey arron. "where ya been?" well gosh I dont know I hit the bottles and the floor and now my ass is really sore."I know. Ive got pictures on my iphone."

FreeskierRocco.$
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Mar 13 2010
10:10:52PM

Quoting SweatyBallShack$ from Mar 13 2010 10:02:19:
Must have been too high to jump. lol

hahaha yea it was. and it's east coast so if I jumped i would have landed on Ice and/or rocks. From 50 feet up...

Ski or Bust
East Coast Living

"I love dick in my ass. Dick is my life. It's what I do!" Robb_Bitt

"Wow, It's an epic battle of the noobs." Freeskierrocco
"It's like the Special olympics!" aKrieg

SweatyBallShack$
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Mar 13 2010
10:21:21PM

Quoting FreeskierRocco.$ from Mar 13 2010 10:10:52:
hahaha yea it was. and it's east coast so if I jumped i would have landed on Ice and/or rocks. From 50 feet up...

Haha. The highest quad in nc is like 40 ft but it gets down to like 5 or 10 in a few places. The people at app flip out when you dont have your bar down on a double thats like 5 ft off the ground almost all the way up

It all started last night when I was totally plastered.I woke up in a dumpster with some lube and a hamster.I found myself in a very strange place. my head really hurt and things drawn on my face. Dont remember a thing cause I blacked out in a hurry, but ive gotta get to cllass, I mean my friends are all worries. "Hey Vin" hey arron. "where ya been?" well gosh I dont know I hit the bottles and the floor and now my ass is really sore."I know. Ive got pictures on my iphone."

FreeskierRocco.$
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Mar 13 2010
10:22:50PM

Quoting SweatyBallShack$ from Mar 13 2010 10:21:21:
Haha. The highest quad in nc is like 40 ft but it gets down to like 5 or 10 in a few places. The people at app flip out when you dont have your bar down on a double thats like 5 ft off the ground almost all the way up

haha that sucks man

Ski or Bust
East Coast Living

"I love dick in my ass. Dick is my life. It's what I do!" Robb_Bitt

"Wow, It's an epic battle of the noobs." Freeskierrocco
"It's like the Special olympics!" aKrieg

*steeze_is_good$
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Mar 13 2010
10:47:23PM

Hey man can you hit the grinds?

Metal_head1: you don't even get 0 you get a fat cock in the face from your boyfriend becuase your a half faggot gay

Who doesnt like legit free stuff?
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oreopancake.$
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Mar 15 2010
5:48:20PM

some guy was talking about how his ski goggles had a "nightvision" mode.

59% average on karma. I'm a D+ user.

207$
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Mar 15 2010
6:06:07PM

a man with a cowboy hat literally dragged his 6 year old son into the park and told him to grind the rail. This kid slides about a ft and pops off, his dad goes nuts "that's my son doing that crazy grind on skis" "boyah lets try some backflips"

Ski in Peace- Shane McConkey, Travis Steeger, and CR Johnson.

The joy I get from skiing ...now thats worth dying for."
-CR Johnson

Days Skied 09/10 Season: 34

My lil bro got on a lift with a complete gaper, gaper turned to my lil bro and asked, are there any blacks on this mountain? My brother replied "No I don't think black people do snow sports they're not acclimatized"

-~Auddie~

gregorio
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Mar 15 2010
6:09:49PM

i have the '09 volkl walls and i was riding up the lift and some guy pointed to my skis and asks me "whoa did you paint that waterville symbol on your skis yourself?" i looked at him and told him no. then the next week the same thing happened to me in the lift line! different guy though

I was sad, I stopped being sad, and then I was awesome

special-J
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Mar 15 2010
6:25:58PM

Quoting Steezasaurus from Mar 10 2008 9:03:13:
gaper: are those tricky skis?
me: yes
gaper: so you can like do tricks and stuff?
me:...yes
gaper: so you can like do grinds and helicopter spins??
me:...........sure
gaper: so are you like spansorized and are in like the xgames with shaun white???
me:....no
gaper:....can you do a backflip??
me: no! you fucking gaper, why the fuck do you and all other peopl like you with your fuckin skiblades come in a park and proceed to create a cluster fuck of bitches and destroy all of our lips and jumps by going 3 miles over it and just going down it and cutting people off and make complete assholes of yourself. god fuckin dammit! alot of people can do backflips and do "helicopters" and grind, you along with the rest of your gaper parasite need to just d=stay out of the park and make everyone happy. fuck!
gaper: ( some high school rich kid) proceeds to get teary eyed

well you, sir, are an absolute douchebag. im all for laughing at funny things gapers say or do or whatever, but dont be an asshole to them because they dont know any better. tell em what not to do, but dont just fucking flip shit on em, then your just being a dick. seriously, so many kids on here are just fucktarts.

mackinnon$
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Mar 15 2010
6:27:10PM

"you got those backwards skis?"

-Laura

"clinical studies show that if you act g or afterbang and you are not high, you are faking it." -bpalmer

"ski edits need more drugs in them"- scof

EVAN_SKIS
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Mar 15 2010
6:30:27PM

okay so i saw a gaper with twin tips

Me: Your skis are bent on both ends, whya is they like that

Him:you can go backwards

Me:that there right down stupid do yall do tricks

Him: yeah i can do 180s and boxs and shit

he proceeds to falling getting off the lift

February 24 2010....RIP CR Johnson

pierce_h
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Mar 15 2010
6:34:07PM

Gaper : wow those are freestly skis?

me :yes

Gaper: i hate those, everytime i lean forward i just pop out

is it hard having to lean so far back to not fall out ?

ive not really had any good ones,

another encounter ::

gaper : your poles are way to small , i know someone who broke their arms because his were too small

.cam.
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Mar 15 2010
6:39:52PM

Quoting pierce_h from Mar 15 2010 6:34:07:
Gaper : wow those are freestly skis?me :yesGaper: i hate those, everytime i lean forward i just pop out is it hard having to lean so far back to not fall out ?ive not really had any good ones, another encounter ::gaper : your poles are way to small , i know someone who broke their arms because his were too small

was he talking about telemark skis?

pigglywiggly$
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Mar 15 2010
6:40:24PM

*gaper on the lift commenting on my suspects*

gaper: wowzers, those are some magnificently looking skis you got there, what are they?"

Me: salomon suspects, they're really nice, i love em.

Gaper: ...hmmm... now, are those are em skis using for spinning and such

Me: yep, there called twin tip skis and used for park

Gaper:......is that two different skis? cause the painting isnt the same.

Me: Nope man, same ski, just different graphic..

Gaper: man, i got to get me some of them

I sag my goggles in chemistry class.

----------------------------------------

SKI THE SPRINGS

W.Ameron$
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Mar 15 2010
6:41:24PM

back when i had my orange teneightys people would always tell me my skis were on backwards

......... and remember to afterbang.... even if you fall!

snowboarders are more rebellious then you will ever strive to be- spork.

Apresbang
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Mar 16 2010
7:37:36AM

Quoting pigglywiggly$ from Mar 15 2010 6:40:24:
*gaper on the lift commenting on my suspects*

gaper: wowzers, those are some magnificently looking skis you got there, what are they?"

Me: salomon suspects, they're really nice, i love em.

Gaper: ...hmmm... now, are those are em skis using for spinning and such

Me: yep, there called twin tip skis and used for park

Gaper:......is that two different skis? cause the painting isnt the same.

Me: Nope man, same ski, just different graphic..

Gaper: man, i got to get me some of them

You, mr.Pigglywiggly are both a scholar and a gent.

Fuck the calender page and fuck you!

jaythemans
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Mar 17 2010
12:27:04AM

Earlier today

Gaper: You in a gang bro?

SweatyBallShack$
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Mar 17 2010
12:29:28AM

So the mtn I was at didnt have a good park, so I entered in the NASTAR race in saga and a tall hoodie. I raced with my music up kinda loud and an old guy yelled at me :0

It all started last night when I was totally plastered.I woke up in a dumpster with some lube and a hamster.I found myself in a very strange place. my head really hurt and things drawn on my face. Dont remember a thing cause I blacked out in a hurry, but ive gotta get to cllass, I mean my friends are all worries. "Hey Vin" hey arron. "where ya been?" well gosh I dont know I hit the bottles and the floor and now my ass is really sore."I know. Ive got pictures on my iphone."

fuck.your.tits
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Mar 17 2010
1:17:49AM

Quoting jaythemans from Mar 17 2010 12:27:04:
Earlier today
Gaper: You in a gang bro?

hahaha

hey guess what?
what?
NOTHIN! ya fuckin idiot

Beard_Of_Moses$
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Mar 17 2010
1:30:02AM

the local race team had a gaper day today. it was a bit of an oxymoron to say the least

i fully understand that regardless of this disclaimer, i will still get accused of sucking his dick. thats ok though, i dont fucking care. because anyone who accuses me of being a shaun white dick-sucker obviously enjoys copious amounts of anal sex with farm animals, specifically pigs and dogs.
- pomme-de-terre talking about shaun white

*CUMMINGS*$
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Mar 17 2010
6:45:20AM

Quoting gregorio from Mar 15 2010 6:09:49:
i have the '09 volkl walls and i was riding up the lift and some guy pointed to my skis and asks me "whoa did you paint that waterville symbol on your skis yourself?" i looked at him and told him no. then the next week the same thing happened to me in the lift line! different guy though

thats happened to me a couple times too lol

"The light the burns twice as fast burns half as long" -skithesprings
RIP CR Johnson 2/24/10
RIP Shane McConkey 3/26/09
RIP Travis Seeger 2/27/09
RIP Hoot Brown 3/24/06
NEVER FORGET
---------------------------------
sagged pants, wide stance; tall tees, cork threes; goggle sag, sponsor swag; hip-hop and rap, tranfer gap; afterbang, in a gang; stylie grabs, sick hand drags

"That's like saying 'I like Christmas because Santa breaks my legs and kills my cats every year."

Dmac2727
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Mar 17 2010
8:17:32AM

so my cousin and i are going up this quad with two snowboarders. I look over and see that they both have their lift tickets stuck to their chest. So we try not to laugh the whole way up and watch them fall getting off the lift. Later that day my cousin and i see a snowboard just sitting underneath the lift on a closed trail. Further up the mountain we see one of those snowboarders running down the mountain going to get his board. I still have no idea how you can drop your snowboard off the lift.

cferg
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Mar 17 2010
9:21:52AM

This guy was asking me if he should hit the lip of some rail and then he kept asking me questions like if he needs a lot of speed to hit this little "jump" and he kept going on and on about the tactics of hitting this "jump" it was funny

joshua
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Mar 17 2010
6:58:10PM

"You should video tape that and put it on youtube!" A dad watching his kid ski said that to me at the bottom of a run after I ate it on a pond skim.

skiing - The art of catching cold and going broke while rapidly heading nowhere at great personal risk.

LoftyLawnChair
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Mar 17 2010
8:15:20PM

i was sitting outside the lodge, and this gaper walks up on rentals, doesnt unclip, and gets on the cement and proceeds to buy a day pass.

Ducky.$
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Mar 17 2010
8:43:42PM

as im reading this thread, my friend is asking me what twin tips are being used for. right after reading the entire first page of this thread

hes a gay swimmer... lol

RIP Shane McConkey & CR Johnson
www.lineskis.com

ROOS.$
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Mar 17 2010
8:50:45PM

Quoting LoftyLawnChair from Mar 17 2010 8:15:20:
i was sitting outside the lodge, and this gaper walks up on rentals, doesnt unclip, and gets on the cement and proceeds to buy a day pass.

thats not being a gaper, thats knowing that you can do whatever the fuck you want because you got rental skis

Thats what i did to my roomate. Now I wear the pants in that room- BrewskiJRr

"Yo mano te olere' mas tarde" = "Yo homes smell ya later"

ns snowboaders

207$
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Mar 18 2010
6:32:59PM

I'm riding single in the lift line and some kid goes "hey johnny go with that kid he looks like a freestyler." (referring to me) I proceed to get on the lift with this kid, goggles falling off, rental skis, and probably 150cm poles. He tells me he can backflip.

Ski in Peace- Shane McConkey, Travis Steeger, and CR Johnson.

The joy I get from skiing ...now thats worth dying for."
-CR Johnson

Days Skied 09/10 Season: 34

My lil bro got on a lift with a complete gaper, gaper turned to my lil bro and asked, are there any blacks on this mountain? My brother replied "No I don't think black people do snow sports they're not acclimatized"

-~Auddie~

10...nuffsaid
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Loner
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Mar 18 2010
7:18:43PM

riding alone, get on a lift with like 3 retards who are riding snowblades. the are chain smoking and buzzed on the alcohol they consumer before getting on their blades. they then proceed to sych each other up by talking about all the "double blacks" they're gonna ride. no the resort i ride does have a freeride zone that is a double black but was closed due to avy danger. then teh one guy pipes up and says " i don't know guys...kinda beat....i mean i can do them, as long as i can take up the whole with my turns and theirs no moguls" they other guy pipes up and says "i wish we could go faster, those skiers have it so easy."

i almost died

I'm down with my black brothas.
- Abraham Lincoln

If you got that junk, than you got the fungus mungus in the shoznager.

JUST BOMB IT!

10...nuffsaid
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Mar 18 2010
7:20:33PM

Quoting backbarvey from Mar 12 2010 11:48:38:
haha i have the same boots. got them at christmas and people ask about them all the time. sooo stupid. i like to tell people theyre moo cows

man i saw a guy yesterday with them and all theses snowboarders and gapers were like pointing them out behind his back and giggling. idiots

I'm down with my black brothas.
- Abraham Lincoln

If you got that junk, than you got the fungus mungus in the shoznager.

JUST BOMB IT!

Oreos$
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Mar 19 2010
5:33:46AM

Quoting 10...nuffsaid from Mar 18 2010 7:18:43:
i wish we could go faster, those skiers have it so easy."

this is why i don't understand snowbladers.

Gorno
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Mar 22 2010
6:11:05PM

Quoting Shukovski from Mar 10 2010 6:09:26:
Gaper: DUDE How do you make the tails go bendy like that? I want to do that 2...did you use fire or something?
I just sighed and said yes, lot's and lot's of fire.

And another time a snowboard sprayed me yelling the park is not for skis. He then procceedingly did a straight air over a 15ft jump and ate shit at the (crash)landing. I then did a switch 5 cork and just afterbanged hard.

Wow,

TheHuggyBear$
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Mar 22 2010
6:45:57PM

I was talking to this girl and while sitting at her house she goes, "So my brother has those short skis, maybe you can take me and you can take yours and teach me freestyle"

me "i ride twin tips not blades"

she " whatever same thing"

me "no"

She "sorry, but what about backflips can you doem"

me "no but i can spin and grab and ride rails"

she "o so no big tricks?"

i told her i had to go walk my do and stopped talking to her hahahaha

...did he just stall on that random log...i wanna do that...

All these kids in these here bright colors look like a bunch of skittles on the mountain today

max...
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Mar 22 2010
7:04:30PM

i have 07 foils and gapers always ask "why do you have a monkey ass on your skis?"

W.Ameron$
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Mar 22 2010
8:00:53PM

Quoting TheHuggyBear$ from Mar 22 2010 6:45:57:
I was talking to this girl and while sitting at her house she goes, "So my brother has those short skis, maybe you can take me and you can take yours and teach me freestyle"me "i ride twin tips not blades"she " whatever same thing"me "no"She "sorry, but what about backflips can you doem"me "no but i can spin and grab and ride rails"she "o so no big tricks?"i told her i had to go walk my do and stopped talking to her hahahaha

-k for turning down easy poon

......... and remember to afterbang.... even if you fall!

snowboarders are more rebellious then you will ever strive to be- spork.

TheHuggyBear$
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Mar 22 2010
8:48:19PM

Quoting W.Ameron$ from Mar 22 2010 8:00:53:
-k for turning down easy poon

yea man i let down all men by that.. buttt who said i didnt get any before that...

im actually giving +k for realizing my mistake before anyone else

...did he just stall on that random log...i wanna do that...

All these kids in these here bright colors look like a bunch of skittles on the mountain today

W.Ameron$
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Mar 22 2010
10:48:01PM

Quoting TheHuggyBear$ from Mar 22 2010 8:48:19:
yea man i let down all men by that.. buttt who said i didnt get any before that...im actually giving +k for realizing my mistake before anyone else

hah nice to see youre a good sport about it, but for real, teach that bitch to ski.

......... and remember to afterbang.... even if you fall!

snowboarders are more rebellious then you will ever strive to be- spork.

TheHuggyBear$
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Mar 22 2010
11:27:43PM

^ i plan on going up to liberty some in the future ill just sit her down and be like watch the park and enjoy haha

...did he just stall on that random log...i wanna do that...

All these kids in these here bright colors look like a bunch of skittles on the mountain today

W.Ameron$
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Mar 22 2010
11:51:30PM

Quoting TheHuggyBear$ from Mar 22 2010 11:27:43:
^ i plan on going up to liberty some in the future ill just sit her down and be like watch the park and enjoy haha

that would be an outstanding plan, if liberty wasnt closed. major bummer

......... and remember to afterbang.... even if you fall!

snowboarders are more rebellious then you will ever strive to be- spork.

doyle.
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Mar 23 2010
1:37:05AM

I heard whispers behind me "look daddy his skis are curved at both ends."

holy pow!

TOUCHE
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Mar 23 2010
2:00:54AM

ok i think after 48 pages we are starting to get repeats

/thread

KEEP IT STEEZY

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