The best gaper quotes - Ski Gabber

Aaaron.
Karma: 67885
11304 Posts
Crazy Fool
icon

Jan 24 2010
8:51:42PM

gapers <3 the "butter table"

this thread is worse than reading youtube comments--blindside

wall.e
Karma: 3450
101 Posts
Pro
icon

Jan 24 2010
8:58:23PM

from the old guy to me wearin a 6x

"why do you dress like that....?"

koffee412
Karma: 4798
296 Posts
Loner
icon

Jan 24 2010
9:23:56PM

lift worker: hey dude wat kind of skis r those

me: line afterbangs

LIft worker: wait dude y do they have a tip on the front and the back

me: bc there twin tips

Lift worker: so r those like snowblades

me: procede to flick him off and get on the lift

I don't just ski, I ski

PC.Jibber
Karma: 68818
1671 Posts
Insane
icon

Jan 24 2010
10:16:06PM

the day after the snowboarding Grand Prix:

"So do they open up that halftube to the public too?"

other gape: "no, r u crazy?"

Yeah cool tricks!!!

-east.coast-mi…
Karma: 5996
288 Posts
Loner
icon

Jan 24 2010
11:38:05PM

"dude, you were going like 35 mph and u just jumped around and skiied backwards. howd you do that!?"

-east.coast-mi…
Karma: 5996
288 Posts
Loner
icon

Jan 24 2010
11:39:13PM

"are you sponsored" "are you sponsored yet" "can you backflip" "how long have you been skiing for" "whats your best trick"

OCEAN
Karma: 6551
91 Posts
Wannabe
icon

Jan 24 2010
11:53:46PM

there were these oriental guys in the lift line behind me. They were wearing jeans and instead of putting their lift ticket on one of the wire wickets, they put them on their jackets like a name tag. They had no idea what the lift guy was talking about when he said "go get a wire for your pass".

http://www.OceanSupplyCo.com

All Natural Ski Wax

Dr._Handsome
Karma: 2838
203 Posts
Loner
icon

Jan 25 2010
8:13:56AM

Some Texan at Hood was taking the magic mile scenic ride, and I passed him as he got off. I was in xxl pants and a 3x tall tee. He looked at me and said "X -Games, raight?"(in a texanish manner)

Damn, Ashley got slammed.

I_Am_Mod$
Karma: 179997
12890 Posts
Crazy Fool
icon

Jan 25 2010
8:15:58AM

Quoting koffee412 from Jan 24 2010 9:23:56:
lift worker: hey dude wat kind of skis r thoseme: line afterbangsLIft worker: wait dude y do they have a tip on the front and the backme: bc there twin tipsLift worker: so r those like snowbladesme: procede to flick him off and get on the lift

that's a dick move, you should've explained him nicely....

Hello, i'm from Belgium, the land of beer,fries and chocolate!

When I get sad, I stop being sad, and be AWESOME instead. True story. -Barney Stinson

GoPro (HD) Cult: join now !!
http://www.newschoolers.com/web/members/culthome/id/4822/t/GoPro+HD/

AUSTINBIKESKI
Karma: 30306
1530 Posts
Insane
icon

Jan 25 2010
9:11:49AM

Quoting koffee412 from Jan 24 2010 9:23:56:
lift worker: hey dude wat kind of skis r thoseme: line afterbangsLIft worker: wait dude y do they have a tip on the front and the backme: bc there twin tipsLift worker: so r those like snowbladesme: procede to flick him off and get on the lift

you gotta educate people on our sport, now the guy probably thinks that we are a bunch of dicks who are assholes to people who dont know that much

yeah they guy is an idiot, but teach him

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."-Dr. Seuss

"austin, you are becoming a righteous person"-my mom

"Tom Wallisch is a bitch"-LJ

"i heard the searchbar has some"

J.Braun
Karma: 13055
594 Posts
Ridiculous
icon

Jan 25 2010
10:41:43AM

"why do all you kids in the jump park wear dresses?"

Potatoes
Karma: 19448
1146 Posts
Insane
icon

Jan 25 2010
12:30:18PM

"i ride ski blades."

www.myspace.com/bigrapct
www.myspace.com/mammothbeatsct

"i eat shit for breakfast"

"it's the freakin weekend baby i'm about to have me some fun" - plato

powderbro
Karma: 56422
3941 Posts
Addict
icon

Jan 25 2010
1:40:41PM

Quoting WaterBottle$ from Jan 24 2010 4:34:54:
I have been asked if they glow in the dark many times

The pink parts of the 08-09 Gotamas do... they don't glow very bright, but it is extremely radical, bro.

What the fuck were you doing?! One looks like a failed abortion and the other like something from chicken run. [ski-plastic]
I said I got the flu from eating tacos at lunch. [onlyskierndak...]

dumont is so hood right now. Nothing says hood like being bankrupt [C-Burg]

JackieKling
Karma: 40413
719 Posts
Ridiculous
icon

Jan 25 2010
2:51:07PM

Quoting skisi from Jan 24 2010 8:33:32:
this kid at my school was tryign to show off about his skiing abilities and saying that he could do backflips and everything..... after talking a little he decided to start bragging about how he was getting new skis: me: "oh so what kind are you getting?"
him "umm some of the new shaped ones"
me: "ummm wait what?"
him: "ya know the ones with the two ends that go up"
me.......

haha its so hard tryin to explain skiin jargon to peeple who dont ski. lol

asain persuasion

theblackrod$
Karma: 16198
1625 Posts
Insane
icon

Jan 25 2010
9:16:41PM

gaper turns around on the chair in front of me and asks
"what year are those Master...?" (couldn't hear him)
"they are afterbangs, this the first year they have been out"
"oh ok, what year are they?"
"are you slow? this is their first year"

“From the lobby, it looked like he elbowed you in the face, you thanked him and asked him for another. Then you came and spat your blood into the garbage as a show of dominance over the rest of them. FRICKIN’ AWESOME!” *high fives me*

Aaaron.
Karma: 67885
11304 Posts
Crazy Fool
icon

Jan 26 2010
5:34:08PM

"these won't break. they have edge armour"

this thread is worse than reading youtube comments--blindside

pow_pow2
Karma: 5373
161 Posts
Pro
icon

Jan 26 2010
5:50:49PM

...once asked how I'm able to turn on the Armada JJ! Let me ski circles around you with my 12m radius! What's your radius on those 67 waist? 20+

grilledsteezeyo
Karma: 14923
1444 Posts
Insane
icon

Jan 26 2010
6:05:16PM

so u do tricks?

yes

do you do the terrain park?

u ski?

yes

goofy or regular?

Notorious S.K.I

*CUMMINGS*$
Karma: 88461
11498 Posts
Crazy Fool
icon

Jan 26 2010
6:06:07PM

Quoting Aaaron. from Jan 26 2010 5:34:08:
"these won't break. they have edge armour"

haha! never a more gaperish word spoken

Hi, I'm Robert Cummings, and I'm addicted to Gnarshmallow

RIP Shane McConkey
---------------------------------
sagged pants, wide stance; tall tees, cork threes; goggle sag, sponsor swag; hip-hop and rap, tranfer gap; afterbang, in a gang; stylie grabs, sick hand drags

"That's like saying 'I like Christmas because Santa breaks my legs and kills my cats every year."
-Billek

I'm the moronic conservative gun-loving version of Ben. - Mr. Panda

rickroller$
Karma: 30917
2372 Posts
Addict
icon

Jan 26 2010
6:32:51PM

Quoting RunDMc from Mar 10 2008 7:48:17:
haha yeah my friend did a "double backflip" which i actually thought was a corked 7, i'm glad there was a 10 year old racer there to correct me

bahahahahaha

rickroller$
Karma: 30917
2372 Posts
Addict
icon

Jan 26 2010
10:35:09PM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dpbUNoS9Kgo hhaahhahaha

Beard_Of_Moses$
Karma: 49770
2318 Posts
Addict
icon

Jan 26 2010
10:56:29PM

my brother went on my facebook and commented on my ski hill's wall if they could put more "Skier friendly features" like flat boxes and get ride of the rails. now nobody takes me serious any more lol

splices look like mutant cross between crowbars, and a piece of shit

Humps$
Karma: 36245
2026 Posts
Addict
icon

Jan 26 2010
11:14:11PM

Quoting EaC from Jul 15 2009 2:32:19:
Gaper: so where have you been skiing today?
Me: Just lapping the park.
Gaper: Oh wow!!!! I will be sure to watch for you on the X Games!

i detect a lie

That looks like a girl I could take advantage of.

SURFACE SKIS
RIP Shane Mcconkey

"Your a tool!"
"Alright."
"What?!"
"Alright."
"YEAH!"

JIB_WALRUS
Karma: 11234
634 Posts
Ridiculous
icon

Jan 27 2010
12:13:55AM

Standing in the lift line with my afterbangs (green base's)

Gaper: do the bottoms of your skis glow in the dark?

Me: face palm

The-white-CON

jibbnsteezy
Karma: 4480
183 Posts
Pro
icon

Jan 27 2010
12:37:06AM

I was at my mountain one sunny day and heres my story

A=Gaper
B= Me

B-I go off skiing and pull my pants up and fix my head phones( skull candy ) I saw a lil orange construction fence thingy and I just jumped over to a switch

A- Follows me

B- I go to the lift and waiting to get on a lift with my friend. and Got the friend and the gaper hops on with us and sat right next to him.

A- How did you jump over the fence to backwards?

B- To be nice, Jump and turn backwards.

A- Cool. Proceeds to say my skis is backwards.

B- Im like No they are not. It's called twin tips.

A- Oh then weird silence

A- I'm gonna try do that thing what you just did.

B- Im like alright, good luck bud.

A- Thanks.

B- Watches him and he tries it and jumps it clearly and turned backwards and ate shit.

My Day Of Ski,

Wake up at 7:30. Eat Breakfast and watch the weather channel. Take a shower quick one. Brush my teeth. Put my ski gear. Haul my boots and skis and poles in the car. Stop at gas station to get gas and cup of coffee. Get to Snowstar about 9:30. Stomp your boots and get your skis. Walk to the snow. Click your skis and get warmed up. Hit rails and ramps all day. Lunch between in that. Night about 11:00. Head home. Get home. Clean my skis and boots. Then Get ready for bed. Thats my day of skiing.

Mitch-DownUnder
Karma: 6054
194 Posts
Pro
icon

Jan 27 2010
2:20:34AM

Quoting BootySpunk.$ from Mar 10 2008 9:23:42:
while doing a tip stand on the bottom of a run

ski pat-"my friend broke his skis doing that once"
me- "they are supposed to do that"
ski pat-"no my friend broke his doing that"
me-"ok"

get down from tip stand and as soon as he skis away i do it again

and i was told one times to ski down a run switch by a bunch of gapers who called my skis "twin tippers" lol

haha i got the exact same thing the other day! haha was crack up, i just laughed at the lifty that said it! haha

j_hamborg
Karma: 101737
547 Posts
Ridiculous
icon

Jan 27 2010
11:39:01AM

Sitting in the lodge, in the morning getting all my gear on, there is a gaper dad with his two gaper snowboarder sons. I see the dad look out the window and there is a kid doing a tip stand out by the ski racks waiting for his friends...

Gaper dad " holy crap guys look at that skier out there! I promise you he is one of the best here! Anyone that has that sort of balance and coordination is a tremendous skier! I bet he is the best here"

Snowboard Gaper sons- of course to cool to acknowledge they have a father

Me- Laughing hysterically

-Jason

ICompton
Karma: 421741
658 Posts
Ridiculous
icon

Jan 27 2010
11:44:48AM

"If I can play bear pong, I can ski pow."

debrah get da humma

http://www.coloradoskishop.com/

http://www.lineskis.com

GreekPeakFreek
Karma: 44958
271 Posts
Loner
icon

Jan 27 2010
12:13:36PM

"Nice helicopter spin!"

There are really only three things to learn in skiing: how to put on your skis, how to slide downhill, and how to walk along the hospital corridor.

W.Ameron$
Karma: 238959
1000 Posts
Insane
icon

Jan 27 2010
6:28:20PM

i was at lunch today and in the cafeteria they always have espn on, so an x games commercial comes on and it has sean white and simon dumont on it and i was like "oooh look at me im sean white im a douchbag" and my friends started saying how hes an awesome snowboarder and a cool guy. so i start saying how he really isnt how he doesnt care about progressing the sport as a whole, my friends start to say," he has a video game how is that not progressing the sport?"

same guys thought dumonts dub front was harder than pks dub cork, saying that, double corks are not that hard.

......... and remember to afterbang.... even if you fall!

snowboarders are more rebellious then you will ever strive to be- spork.

Mike.Steezze
Karma: 5663
408 Posts
Ridiculous
icon

Jan 27 2010
8:21:44PM

Quoting W.Ameron$ from Jan 27 2010 6:28:20:
i was at lunch today and in the cafeteria they always have espn on, so an x games commercial comes on and it has sean white and simon dumont on it and i was like "oooh look at me im sean white im a douchbag" and my friends started saying how hes an awesome snowboarder and a cool guy. so i start saying how he really isnt how he doesnt care about progressing the sport as a whole, my friends start to say," he has a video game how is that not progressing the sport?"same guys thought dumonts dub front was harder than pks dub cork, saying that, double corks are not that hard.

So true. Shaun White doesnt care about progressing the SPORT just HIMSELF, pretty selfish. He has his own personal half pipe with a foam pit at the end to try new tricks!!! but does anyone else get to use it, nope just shaun and maybe a few very very lucky burton riders or his buds.

JUST SKI IT

j_hamborg
Karma: 101737
547 Posts
Ridiculous
icon

Jan 27 2010
8:38:17PM

Quoting Mike.Steezze from Jan 27 2010 8:21:44:
So true. Shaun White doesnt care about progressing the SPORT just HIMSELF, pretty selfish. He has his own personal half pipe with a foam pit at the end to try new tricks!!! but does anyone else get to use it, nope just shaun and maybe a few very very lucky burton riders or his buds.

^^^ You guys are right! What a jerk face! He should pay for building the foam pit, maintaining it, and operating it and then open it to the public. Thats like saying a countries olympic ski team should invite the other country over to their place and discuss the new secret waxing techniques so everyone can have a fair chance... WTF!? Shaun White kills it, he has progressed the sport, by being ridiculously kick ass at snowboarding and a great personality. Not selfish, you two just don't have a clue.

Double corks are harder than double fronts... so you get my vote there.

-Jason

EaC
Karma: 406
111 Posts
Pro
icon

Jan 27 2010
8:58:33PM

Quoting Humps$ from Jan 26 2010 11:14:11:
i detect a lie

oh no... it sounds totally rediculous, but it is true. The conversation was longer, but I am too lazy to type it all out. I have another one too. Today at school I was wearing my purple jiberish LITC tee, and we just switched classes for the second semester. We had to say something interesting about ourselves. Obviously I said I am an avid skier and spend all the time I can on the mountain. My teacher procededs to ask me, I see your a soccer fan too. I give her a funny look, and she says you're wearing a soccer jersey, what team is it?

KevH9990$
Karma: 8115
57 Posts
Wannabe
icon

Jan 27 2010
10:57:39PM

Quoting OCEAN from Jan 24 2010 11:53:46:
there were these oriental guys in the lift line behind me. They were wearing jeans and instead of putting their lift ticket on one of the wire wickets, they put them on their jackets like a name tag. They had no idea what the lift guy was talking about when he said "go get a wire for your pass".

i work at the rental shop at my hill and this actually happens so often i just stopped caring.

Also the amount of older people asking if we rent those "short skis" kinda makes me sad then when i give them a proper sized ski they get all pissed and try to get me to give me them the 87cm children's skis

Kevin Was Here

juhocha
Karma: 33
21 Posts
Lame
icon

Jan 28 2010
5:02:23PM

Quoting Barefootin_Fie… from Mar 24 2008 8:03:35:
worthless piece of info for ya...

360s are actually called helicopters (generally abbreviated to heli(s)) in freestyle waterski jumping...(like the shit you see at sea world, etc) but 7s are still called 7s......so that's why you might hear the term "helicopter" on the mountain.

yeah but in skiing a 360 is not a helicopter so they are wrong if they call it that whether they are a water skier or not. for a helicopter you have to do a 360 while inverted with your skis crossed get it? like a helicopter... dumb water skiers lol

Evilchris
Karma: 29322
2113 Posts
Addict
icon

Jan 28 2010
5:49:21PM

I was skiing my dad one of his very good friends and his younger son awhile ago and he was telling me how he used to be able to do helicopters off any mogul when he was younger. I do not doubt him at all. he is one of the few sales reps for 4frnt and also for flow snowboards. he is one of the best regular skiers i have ever watched.

PC.Jibber
Karma: 68818
1671 Posts
Insane
icon

Jan 28 2010
7:26:03PM

Quoting juhocha from Jan 28 2010 5:02:23:
yeah but in skiing a 360 is not a helicopter so they are wrong if they call it that whether they are a water skier or not.

for a helicopter you have to do a 360 while inverted with your skis crossed get it? like a helicopter... dumb water skiers lol

in freeestyle mogul skiing, any spin in a perfect T-set is called a helicopter

Yeah cool tricks!!!

Inb4_P.Dog
Karma: 2845
365 Posts
Loner
icon

Jan 28 2010
7:36:27PM

Gaper: Are those your skis? Both of Em'?

Inb4_P.Dog
Karma: 2845
365 Posts
Loner
icon

Jan 28 2010
7:38:31PM

Fuck i just remembered one.

Gaper: Hey which chair do i take back down the hill?

Me: ....

oreopancake.$
Karma: 14044
2655 Posts
Addict
icon

Jan 28 2010
8:04:40PM

Some kid told me I "looked like a fool with my pants on the ground" yesterday in the lift line. Not a gaper quote but it was pretty funny.

Aaaron.
Karma: 67885
11304 Posts
Crazy Fool
icon

Jan 28 2010
8:09:57PM

Quoting oreopancake.$ from Jan 28 2010 8:04:40:
Some kid told me I "looked like a fool with my pants on the ground" yesterday in the lift line. Not a gaper quote but it was pretty funny.

haha excellent!!!

this thread is worse than reading youtube comments--blindside

Mike.Steezze
Karma: 5663
408 Posts
Ridiculous
icon

Jan 28 2010
8:17:44PM

Azn gapers behind me, probly about 30 or 40. they looked fuckin hilarious and soo out of place.

"Hey, you know your skis are on backwards" in very broken english
.....

JUST SKI IT

Trojan~Man
Karma: 63975
1954 Posts
Insane
icon

Jan 28 2010
11:17:34PM

Quoting Inb4_P.Dog from Jan 28 2010 7:36:27:
Gaper: Are those your skis? Both of Em'?

hahaha dumb and dumber?

Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!"

Humps$
Karma: 36245
2026 Posts
Addict
icon

Jan 29 2010
10:13:32AM

Quoting koffee412 from Jan 24 2010 9:23:56:
lift worker: hey dude wat kind of skis r thoseme: line afterbangsLIft worker: wait dude y do they have a tip on the front and the backme: bc there twin tipsLift worker: so r those like snowbladesme: procede to flick him off and get on the lift

another lie

That looks like a girl I could take advantage of.

SURFACE SKIS
RIP Shane Mcconkey

"Your a tool!"
"Alright."
"What?!"
"Alright."
"YEAH!"

Aaaron.
Karma: 67885
11304 Posts
Crazy Fool
icon

Jan 29 2010
3:06:31PM

not gaper but it's too good to post and i don't know where else to put it
Playing SSX 3 with my little brother. he goes "this game is unrealistic. The girls are actually good"

this thread is worse than reading youtube comments--blindside

Evilchris
Karma: 29322
2113 Posts
Addict
icon

Jan 29 2010
4:00:01PM

Quoting Aaaron. from Jan 29 2010 3:06:31:
not gaper but it's too good to post and i don't know where else to put it
Playing SSX 3 with my little brother. he goes "this game is unrealistic. The girls are actually good"

thats hilarious

Want free stuff? sign up and win just by searching.
http://sessions.searchpluswin.com/refer/evilchris50

skier797
Karma: 879
75 Posts
Wannabe
icon

Jan 29 2010
7:44:49PM

a lot of people said this but. "can you like backflip?"

most ski tricks are 70% commitment

steveys
Karma: 2309
269 Posts
Loner
icon

Jan 29 2010
11:28:42PM

Quoting wall.e from Jan 24 2010 8:58:23:
from the old guy to me wearin a 6x
"why do you dress like that....?"

Dude, that old guy SUCKS!! You should of told him "Dont be a bigot just because I am gay and like to wear skirts!!" That old fuc*er should of said "you look really pretty in that dress".

steveys
Karma: 2309
269 Posts
Loner
icon

Jan 29 2010
11:31:46PM

Quoting J.Braun from Jan 25 2010 10:41:43:
"why do all you kids in the jump park wear dresses?"

Dude, that is so lame!! You should have told him "you shouldn't hate on us for being gay and being a gay that likes to take dick up the butt. You think it is cool for girls to take dick up the butt, why hate on us for being fags??"

AreMG
Karma: 85966
1631 Posts
Insane
icon

Jan 31 2010
1:33:32PM

Quoting steveys from Jan 29 2010 11:31:46:
Dude, that is so lame!! You should have told him "you shouldn't hate on us for being gay and being a gay that likes to take dick up the butt. You think it is cool for girls to take dick up the butt, why hate on us for being fags??"

Well thanks to your useless, assholish double post, we have now ascertained that you, Steveys, don't like tall tees. I'm sure everyone else in this thread, like me, feels much more wise and enlightened now that we are aware of your convictions on ski fashion.

To all you tall-tee wearers, let the haters (Steveys) hate. We don't need them anyway.

"I had to hunt down Pretty Ricky and steal back our Doritos."

"put a piece of duct tape on the tip of your skis that says just fucking do it" -5oh9

"just because it wasnt a switch cork 5 blunt with 8 yards of fabric flapping in the breeze doesnt mean it wasnt steezy." -Ben.

get over it and have fun... -noodle

The best gaper quotes - Ski Gabber - Forums

Related News Articles

Sorry. But it?s true guys.

SCI Video

Gaper Day

How to become a gaper.

Member Of The Month

Vids Being Watched

Pics Recently Viewed

Latest News