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Subject: The best gaper quotes
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RICK_ROSS$
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6436 Posts
No Life
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Mar 10 2008
7:33:59PM
somebody on the chairlift yesterday asked me what they did with the moguls at the end of the year?
i also gotten "what altitude do the dear turn to elk?"
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[]Soul_Steeze[]
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Dec 20 2008
12:47:33AM
Quoting Klazo$ from Dec 20 2008 12:45:01:
Moments

oh, haha

yea that makes sense

Scott Vail taught me how to do a whirleybird!!1!!1!!!1!!11!!!

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Dukeybrains
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Insane
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Dec 20 2008
1:53:41AM
some of you  guys are really mean to nice gapers.
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PAINE_IN_MAINE
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302 Posts
Loner
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Dec 20 2008
10:28:01AM

there was a kid in one of my high school classes last year, that insisted on telling me that "my ski blades are much faster than regular skis, and they are alot better when doing rails, spins and backflips, because your doublecurl( I think he meant twip tip) skis are so heavy

me: oh can you do back flips, rails, or any spins

gaper: no

me: have you ever tried

gaper: no i just like going fast

me: where do you go skiing?

gaper: I mainly go in my backyard, but I went to a mountain last year

its hard to look steezy when you just dont give a shit

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ATLskier$
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Dec 20 2008
11:52:51AM
I was just on a ski trip in steamboat and I heard this kid say that moguls were formed from the way the snow falls.

I dont even see any logic whatsoever in that statement.
a friend of mine was driving through georgia on a road trip. hes a northerner mind you, and he ends up getting pulled over for speeding. the cop goes "son you were goin 80 in a 60. no one goes that fast through georgia." my friend responds with "well, Sherman did" he ended up spending the night in jail -freeze_pooter
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Klazo$
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12704 Posts
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Dec 20 2008
11:58:15AM
"This fucking sucks, they havn't even groomed yet" - 8 inches of fresh for night skiing...
I'm just sayin'

http://www.momentskis.com
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mike_e
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Dec 21 2008
4:54:13PM

ok so yesterday my mom drove me and my friend up to the mountain...

were about ten minutes away and i say to my friend "i really need to get a pretzel today."  When we pull into the parking lot my mom says "how much do you want for that pretzel you were talking about?" and pulls out some money.

Man Law #25 states: Being a Pirate should be considered a Manly job because pirates get two types of booty.

"one time a girl in first grade stole my rice krispie treat, so i bit her." -[wh@]

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steezepleeze~
Karma: 5446
103 Posts
Pro
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Dec 21 2008
5:11:21PM
hiking park surrounded by gapers...

gaper: UR PRETTY GOOD CAN YOU HELICOPTER
me: no nobody can do that
gaper: ITS PROBABLY TOO HARD
me: thatswhatshesaid
gaper: WHAT? DO A BARRELROLL

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purplejumpsuit
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Dec 21 2008
5:39:25PM
Quoting shredtahoestee… from Dec 10 2008 11:38:52:
my freind who is not actually a bad skiier just not good at park asks me and some freinds who our favorite skiers are.
kid- whos your favorite skier??
us- i dunno thers lots of em that i like
kid- oh thats cool... i like jon olsson
but he said it like "john" ya know? i laughed soo hard
tons of people in my town say john when talking, honestly im not even sure if I know how to pronounce his first name anymore, iv herd it said so many diff ways so many times and been told im saying it wrong so many times.
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BcL$
Karma: 253124
6539 Posts
No Life
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Dec 21 2008
5:44:40PM
Quoting purplejumpsuit from Dec 21 2008 5:39:25:
tons of people in my town say john when talking, honestly im not even sure if I know how to pronounce his first name anymore, iv herd it said so many diff ways so many times and been told im saying it wrong so many times.
Jon = Yewn

I heard this gaper yesterday talking about how hard it is to go up and down the stairs in the lodge in "Ski Shoes".
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ WisCompton. "I don't do drugs to be cool, I do drugs because they are cool." -C.M.
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CakedWiddit
Karma: 7082
269 Posts
Loner
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Dec 21 2008
5:44:47PM

"So did someone steal our pole?"

and easily

"Are you that kid who was skiing backwards

Me-"Yes"

"Just wanted to make sure you knew you were facing the wrong way"



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griffon
Karma: 3304
168 Posts
Pro
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Dec 21 2008
6:17:11PM
"are those volcom skis?"
a gaper friend of me said that and pointed at the sticker on my ski

i got another one whos amazing but really hard to translate but something like this.
me:hey we were in front of you!
gaper: relax mr. yoyo
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fezz
Karma: 15260
543 Posts
Ridiculous
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Dec 21 2008
7:06:03PM
yesterday some gaqer asked my friend if he was in "the class" referring to park skiers, i think
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BigRodRiley$
Karma: 9212
1271 Posts
Insane
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Dec 21 2008
7:12:11PM
Quoting mike_e from Dec 21 2008 4:54:13:
ok so yesterday my mom drove me and my friend up to the mountain...
were about ten minutes away and i say to my friend "i really need to get a pretzel today."  When we pull into the parking lot my mom says "how much do you want for that pretzel you were talking about?" and pulls out some money.
i dont fucking get it.
-----------------------------------------------------------
gl hf es dd ka dfu

Ski strong like bull, make love like tractor.

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BigRodRiley$
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1271 Posts
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Dec 21 2008
7:13:11PM
^ ah k nvm pretzel the rail.. cuz my place has pretzels for sale and i always eat them
-----------------------------------------------------------
gl hf es dd ka dfu

Ski strong like bull, make love like tractor.

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Aaaron.
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11299 Posts
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Dec 21 2008
7:59:36PM
my brother facebook-chatted this dude(major gaper. whose status was like "skiing was sooo fun today"
 and it went like
bro:  how was it today?
kid:   it was ok.  the conditions sucked.  they only had one black diamond open
bro: how was the park
kid:  it wasn't too good.  they didn't have any big jumps.  just one small one.  and rails
bro: what's your best trick?
kid:  um.   i ski.   so i basically just jump really high.

"Side Note: Immediately after pressing the rainbow he reached into his pocket and pulled out a bag of skittles and tasted the rainbow. Now thats what I call AFTER BANG."..............

I have this neighbor who is really mean to my mom. so I always toss my empty beers on his lawn at night. it's justice. I'm kind of like batman
-fromyourstruly.................

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Klazo$
Karma: 57152
12704 Posts
Crazy Fool
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Dec 21 2008
9:13:58PM
Today while waiting to drop into a glade that leads to a cliff...

"Why would you ski in the trees all the canopies catch all the snow, and the stuff that does get in there just blows out anyways...the best of the snow is here on the runs"

I just replied with "Thanks tips, dropping"
I'm just sayin'

http://www.momentskis.com
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mokeefe257$
Karma: 5028
408 Posts
Ridiculous
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Dec 21 2008
9:16:10PM
hahaha so many of these are good stories
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idontactuallys…
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1338 Posts
Insane
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Dec 21 2008
9:33:26PM
"if you can do a rail on skis then your like pro thats how hard it is" - Matt O'keefe (mokeefe257)
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BaltoUltimate Bling!
Karma: 435755
24937 Posts
@th1337
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Dec 21 2008
9:44:36PM
this was yesterday, between a gaper ski patroler and my self(i was on my EPs)

sp-hey you stop
me-did i do something wrong?
sp-your skis are broken, they are bent up to much, they are not safe
me-its called rocker, its for powder
sp-im telling you they are broken, im calling a sled to take you down to the lodge

so the second to head pro patrol taylor shows up and is just like

T-what seems to be the problem?
sp-his skis are broken
T-no they are not, dont stop people because your to much of a gaper to know about ski tech
me-*skis away*
509 headwear www.myspace.com/509headwear 509headwear@gmail.com
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Shlogan
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No Life
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Dec 21 2008
9:44:53PM
my freind:
look at that looooser dude! his tall-tee is longer than his jacket!
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Aaaron.
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11299 Posts
Crazy Fool
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Dec 21 2008
9:51:32PM
Quoting Shlogan from Dec 21 2008 9:44:53:
my freind:look at that looooser dude! his tall-tee is longer than his jacket!
bs
no one says that.
gapers don't even know what tall tees are.
i didn't.. until i joined this site.

"Side Note: Immediately after pressing the rainbow he reached into his pocket and pulled out a bag of skittles and tasted the rainbow. Now thats what I call AFTER BANG."..............

I have this neighbor who is really mean to my mom. so I always toss my empty beers on his lawn at night. it's justice. I'm kind of like batman
-fromyourstruly.................

  • 0
Boggnarly
Karma: 416
115 Posts
Pro
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Dec 22 2008
12:13:10AM
Quoting Aaaron. from Dec 21 2008 9:51:32:
bs
no one says that.
gapers don't even know what tall tees are.
i didn't.. until i joined this site.
/facepalm
Skanking to the rhythm of the music by my side
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Gnarshred
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5744 Posts
No Life
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Dec 22 2008
12:18:54AM
Quoting ATLskier$ from Dec 20 2008 11:52:51:
I was just on a ski trip in steamboat and I heard this kid say that moguls were formed from the way the snow falls.

I dont even see any logic whatsoever in that statement.

Haha that would be dope.  Chaos theory man!

Shit yes! Shred the gnar before the gnar shreds you!
  • 0
tribefan226
Karma: 55832
2125 Posts
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Dec 22 2008
12:39:46AM
gaper: i see u got those double tipped skis there
me: uh yeah i guess
gaper: so r u one of those hotdoggers?
  • 0
Dukeybrains
Karma: 5318
1033 Posts
Insane
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Dec 22 2008
4:02:36AM
Quoting Aaaron. from Dec 21 2008 9:51:32:
bs
no one says that.
gapers don't even know what tall tees are.
i didn't.. until i joined this site.
^^Gaper

Everyone knows what tall tees are, it's not like only skiers wear them what the fuck

you da gaper
  • 0
mitchk
Karma: 3493
681 Posts
Ridiculous
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Dec 22 2008
10:05:56AM
Quoting BaltoUltimate Bling! from Dec 21 2008 9:44:36:
this was yesterday, between a gaper ski patroler and my self(i was on my EPs)sp-hey you stopme-did i do something wrong?sp-your skis are broken, they are bent up to much, they are not safeme-its called rocker, its for powdersp-im telling you they are broken, im calling a sled to take you down to the lodgeso the second to head pro patrol taylor shows up and is just likeT-what seems to be the problem?sp-his skis are brokenT-no they are not, dont stop people because your to much of a gaper to know about ski techme-*skis away*

bahaha thats good

im sitting in comm tech watchin some ski vids and this brown guy that sits beside me:

bg:yo guy can you do a kickflipper?

me:?

bg:next level guy

kinda shitty but it was funny to me.

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T-rose
Karma: 10352
128 Posts
Pro
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Dec 22 2008
11:53:43AM
Quoting TonyTheTiger from Mar 10 2008 7:45:12:


Also the traditionnal :
:Are you good at skiing?
Me: not bad...
:Do you do jumps?
Me: Yes
:Can you do backflips?
classic because they always ask if you can backflip.........Ihttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QxCjXI9Z_qI
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Twinjibber77$
Karma: 177145
5389 Posts
No Life
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Dec 22 2008
1:24:31PM
Quoting Shlogan from Dec 21 2008 9:44:53:
his tall-tee is longer than his jacket!
Only way to stay true to tha streets.
TP UNIT
Swain is Fresh *ANYONE WANTS MOSS COLOR SIVER CARTEL IN XL AN L PM ME*!!!!!!!!!!
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summersoverUltimate Bling!
Karma: 263325
5802 Posts
No Life
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Dec 22 2008
4:52:29PM
Quoting BaltoUltimate Bling! from Dec 21 2008 9:44:36:
this was yesterday, between a gaper ski patroler and my self(i was on my EPs)sp-hey you stopme-did i do something wrong?sp-your skis are broken, they are bent up to much, they are not safeme-its called rocker, its for powdersp-im telling you they are broken, im calling a sled to take you down to the lodgeso the second to head pro patrol taylor shows up and is just likeT-what seems to be the problem?sp-his skis are brokenT-no they are not, dont stop people because your to much of a gaper to know about ski techme-*skis away*
hahahah thats hilarious you should have showed him how unnaturally soft they were too definetely unsafe
steve.
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Gall*
Karma: 292
58 Posts
Wannabe
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Dec 22 2008
5:19:58PM
Quoting willis.$ from Dec 14 2008 12:14:03:
Gaper: points to my skis and says: Are those super hero skis?Me: What?Gaper: your skis look like they have superheros on themMe: Oh. No they are mexican wrestlersGaper: Oh. (silence the rest of the lift)
haha some guy asked me if i painted the pink/blue line logos on my invaders. I told him no and he continued to admire them for the rest of the lift ride, he said they were very unique.
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Aaaron.
Karma: 67856
11299 Posts
Crazy Fool
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Dec 22 2008
5:57:32PM
Quoting Dukeybrains from Dec 22 2008 4:02:36:
^^Gaper

Everyone knows what tall tees are, it's not like only skiers wear them what the fuck

you da gaper
i always thought skiiers in big clothes were intimidating..
until i joined NS
"Side Note: Immediately after pressing the rainbow he reached into his pocket and pulled out a bag of skittles and tasted the rainbow. Now thats what I call AFTER BANG."..............

I have this neighbor who is really mean to my mom. so I always toss my empty beers on his lawn at night. it's justice. I'm kind of like batman
-fromyourstruly.................

  • 0
caucasian_chad$
Karma: 82346
3397 Posts
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Dec 22 2008
6:47:33PM
Quoting Dukeybrains from Dec 20 2008 1:53:41:
some of you  guys are really mean to nice gapers.
Yeah...  I'm not a dick to gapers unless they think they know everything or get in my way.  If you laugh in their face just because it's funny to you, you look like this:
About My Icon:
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MalcolmUltimate Bling!
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Dec 22 2008
6:59:00PM
Quoting PAINE_IN_MAINE from Dec 20 2008 10:28:01:

me: oh can you do back flips
wait a sec. you asked a gaper if he could backflip?
Weezyblog shut the fuck up
  • 0
Yung_Gnarley$
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8460 Posts
Crazy Fool
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Dec 22 2008
8:18:56PM
Quoting Shpadoinkle from Mar 10 2008 8:33:20:
They store the moguls in Texas. Everyone knows that.
hahahahahahaha!!!!

i think i pissed my pants!


..........



....k no i didn't but hahahah
hey! that's a ghost, not a carrot! silly!
  • 0
Aaaron.
Karma: 67856
11299 Posts
Crazy Fool
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Dec 22 2008
9:03:19PM
Quoting Yung_Gnarley$ from Dec 22 2008 8:18:56:
hahahahahahaha!!!!i think i pissed my pants
excellent.

"Side Note: Immediately after pressing the rainbow he reached into his pocket and pulled out a bag of skittles and tasted the rainbow. Now thats what I call AFTER BANG."..............

I have this neighbor who is really mean to my mom. so I always toss my empty beers on his lawn at night. it's justice. I'm kind of like batman
-fromyourstruly.................

  • 0
PC.Jibber
Karma: 68633
1669 Posts
Insane
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Dec 22 2008
10:46:18PM

not a quote, but today i saw 5 people wearing

swim goggles.....

!!!

In the amazing event of crazy deep pow, your skis may be used as a flotation device.

-some really sick powder skis I saw @ the local shop.
  • 0
MalcolmUltimate Bling!
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Dec 22 2008
10:50:28PM
Quoting PC.Jibber from Dec 22 2008 10:46:18:
not a quote, but today i saw 5 people wearing
swim goggles.....
!!!
HAHA i wouldve wanted to see that so badly. plus theyre were 5 of them shit thats like a family of racoons
Weezyblog shut the fuck up
  • 0
PC.Jibber
Karma: 68633
1669 Posts
Insane
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Dec 22 2008
10:56:42PM
Quoting MalcolmUltimate Bling! from Dec 22 2008 10:50:28:
shit thats like a family of racoons

i know thats wat i was thinking!!

i could see it if it were an epic powder day, and it was just some locals "swimming in the pow its so deep", but this was at the base, and there was almost no new snow...!:D

In the amazing event of crazy deep pow, your skis may be used as a flotation device.

-some really sick powder skis I saw @ the local shop.
  • 0
timmi$
Karma: 142871
12336 Posts
Crazy Fool
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Dec 22 2008
11:27:20PM
a couple days ago with a gaper on the lift:

me - yeah its nice today but its suposed to be warm and rainy tommorrow
him- i dont care what its like down in the city as long as its snowing up here!

(our hill has an impressive 400 feet vertical.
"im srot of drunk right now, and i aparently puched a girl in the face tonight."
-Skier_16

  • 0
.Jibber20
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210 Posts
Loner
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Dec 22 2008
11:42:48PM
"skiings not a sport its a hobby"

  • 0
MO-gan
Karma: 28098
722 Posts
Ridiculous
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Dec 22 2008
11:51:31PM
my golf coach who is also a basketball coach at my school tells my friend and i all the time that skiing is not a sport at all and that its only gravity... nothing else
he will pick up like a pen or something and drop it and say "see... skiing"
it pisses me off so much
we argue with him every time and it gets us no where
  • 0
Bombogenesis$
Karma: 159376
9585 Posts
Crazy Fool
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Dec 22 2008
11:53:12PM
Quoting MO-gan from Dec 22 2008 11:51:31:
my golf coach who is also a basketball coach at my school tells my friend and i all the time that skiing is not a sport at all and that its only gravity... nothing else
he will pick up like a pen or something and drop it and say "see... skiing"
it pisses me off so much
we argue with him every time and it gets us no where
is he a gym teacher by any chance?
I opted for a BJ the other night cause I was tired and lazy, and I hadn't jacked i or anything in like a week. I ended up jizzing all over her face and tits and hair, once I started jizzing I just started cracking up and didn't stop laughing for like 2 minutes after I jizzed and she was just sitting there like covered. - Marshall.
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MO-gan
Karma: 28098
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Ridiculous
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Dec 22 2008
11:55:32PM
Quoting Bombogenesis$ from Dec 22 2008 11:53:12:
is he a gym teacher by any chance?
haha no.... but i'm guessing you have a gym teacher who is the same way
  • 0
Bombogenesis$
Karma: 159376
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Crazy Fool
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Dec 22 2008
11:57:27PM
Quoting MO-gan from Dec 22 2008 11:55:32:
haha no.... but i'm guessing you have a gym teacher who is the same way
damnit...no I was gonna say you could have folded your arms and watched kids run around and gone "see...gym teacher"
I opted for a BJ the other night cause I was tired and lazy, and I hadn't jacked i or anything in like a week. I ended up jizzing all over her face and tits and hair, once I started jizzing I just started cracking up and didn't stop laughing for like 2 minutes after I jizzed and she was just sitting there like covered. - Marshall.
  • 0
sirskizalot$
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4396 Posts
No Life
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Dec 22 2008
11:58:34PM

Lady: What's a rail jam?

Her husband: Use your imagination honey.

Me:Its a competition where you ski rails.

Lady: Oh...I knew that, i just didnt know that skiers did that.

A trick without the bang is kinda like a driveby without shooting anybody. -Alex_G/////////////////////////////////////////////////// You name it i bang it -GRFreeskier
  • 0
MO-gan
Karma: 28098
722 Posts
Ridiculous
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Dec 23 2008
12:06:16AM
Quoting Bombogenesis$ from Dec 22 2008 11:57:27:
damnit...no I was gonna say you could have folded your arms and watched kids run around and gone "see...gym teacher"
haha that would be great
i'll have to find something like that for him haha
any ideas how to prove him wrong or just make him look stupid like that?
btw he is a geography and economics teacher
  • 0
Bombogenesis$
Karma: 159376
9585 Posts
Crazy Fool
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Dec 23 2008
12:10:08AM
Quoting MO-gan from Dec 23 2008 12:06:16:
haha that would be great
i'll have to find something like that for him haha
any ideas how to prove him wrong or just make him look stupid like that?
btw he is a geography and economics teacher
hit the back of his  knee with a five iron and when he drops  make a gravity joke
I opted for a BJ the other night cause I was tired and lazy, and I hadn't jacked i or anything in like a week. I ended up jizzing all over her face and tits and hair, once I started jizzing I just started cracking up and didn't stop laughing for like 2 minutes after I jizzed and she was just sitting there like covered. - Marshall.
  • 0
espen^R
Karma: 88158
2326 Posts
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Dec 23 2008
8:00:32AM
so, me and my friend was shaping the kicker of a jump right, because it was all bombed and full of annoying tracks.
so this gaper comes up and say out pretty loud:

"Hey! Stop removing the tracks from the ski jump"

We ignored him and continued, then left and had a nice session.


Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did!
  • 0
BMB$
Karma: 22423
2856 Posts
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Dec 23 2008
9:12:32AM
Quoting .Jibber20 from Dec 22 2008 11:42:48:
"skiings not a sport its a hobby"

yeah, I've gotten into so many arguments w/ people over that subject.

http://www.newschoolers.com/web/content/blogs/member_id/94514/



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qL7ocY3a1Yw
read my blog

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nkinsman10
Karma: 20478
1071 Posts
Insane
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Dec 23 2008
3:21:13PM
i just got back from whistler, and my dad said this on the car ride home

"did they have a park hill, or a wreck hill or whatever you call it. the thing with the halfpipe."
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