Do you find yourself wondering what (insert pros name) is up to? Do you watch an event and worry why (insert pros name) wasn't competing or where in the fuck (insert pros name) could he be if he's not at a ski comp.? Well worry your little scrunched up nuts no more because new for 2011 is the Pro Tracker 1000! By surgically inserting microscopic GPS chips into all known pros without their consent or knowledge, you can now be the first to know! By logging into your confidential Pro Tracker account on http://www.protracker.com you can get up to the minute information on where your favorite pro is! For only 49.99 a month you can have unlimited access to the best and quickest information on your favorite skiers. We at Pro Tracker believe that it's not stalking or creepy, you're just really interested in the lives of other people that you don't know.
Coming in 2012 (the year of John Cusack), Pro Tracker will be releasing an iPhone app. so you can access your Pro Tracker account anywhere at any time! Be the first cool kid on the ski hill and pre-register today!