This Saturday marked the inaugural opening day of the First Ever Jackson Hole Ladies Freeskiing Group Shred Pinkname Invasion of Doom (FEJLFGSPID for short). If you aren't quite sure what that means join the club, no one here really knows either. What we do know is that FEJLFGSPID is a good time.
Apparently we are shaping women's skiing or something but as the creepy photo guy I'm going to leave a recap of that sort of thing for the ladies, when I try to talk about this stuff I usually end up using the word "empowered" incorrectly and getting in trouble with the Women's Center at my school.
Thanks to the tireless labors of some of our very own ladies of newschoolers and the sponsor support of Orage and Blackstrap we have invaded Jackson Hole with a posse of female rippers and media people with some loose goals that include Getting The Shot, pole-whacking, cossacks, and general tomfoolery.
The serious, meaty articles will come after the event, for now, a brief personal highlight reel.
-I leave at 7am to pick up Kylie. I have never met her but she is a skier, I drive 1.5 hours to Couer D'Alene
-In Couer D'Alene we realize that this rendezvous might be harder than we thought since we can't text or call each other, I wander the CDA/Post Falls area looking for any car that may belong to a skier
-Kylie sees me walking past and deduces from my beard and Birkenstocks that I might be the ski dude she is supposed to be meeting
-We finally hit the road after I get lost several times trying to find the highway
-With a ten hour road trip ahead of us I play an eclectic selection of music, I start to wonder if I might just drive Kylie crazy enough that the police find my dead body on the side of the road with my ipod stuffed into my throat. Instead we sing karaoke for 10 hours
-Near Driggs we see another Subaru filled with skier women. I think they might be going to the same place as us so I awkwardly approach them, turns out they don't even know what NS is. I feel awkward and I'm pretty sure one of them might be in my Econ class
-Somewhere in Montana Roxanne (my car) starts to hiccup. Unperturbed we pull over and turn it off and back on again. We then proceed to drive four more hours without issue
-We arrive at Jackson Hole to find Troy, Erika, Natalie and Maddie waiting for us with open arms. More importantly they also have tacos
-Breakfast Burritos, Zach cooks and Troy and I do dishes, this week is all about the ladies after all
-We try to go skiing but it turns out that getting a huge group of people to all go skiing at once is a bit of an ordeal, finally we get it all worked out.
-Everybody is really good at skiing, I ride at the edge of control trying to keep up, one bump away from a camera gear yard-sale.
-We shred all day, concluding with an approximately 20 person clump/train that confuses and frightens several gaper tourists.
-We find a Thai restaurant that is BYOB
-More skiing, more pictures, more confused gapers
-The Jackson Stash Park lends it self to several spontaneous hiking sessions as everyone pushes each other and progresses
-Everything is going great until Katie hits the hitching post, What is the worst thing that could happen on this feature? This:
-Somehow Katie gets up and proclaims that she wants to do the "wiggle" I wonder if you can get a concussion from smashing your shins hard enough
-We go shred the "wiggle," a steep tight banked slalom that makes me wish I didn't have my life savings in camera gear around my waist
-We take "one last run" that leads to being chased off the mountain by patrol
-I edit photos at the Cowboy Village which has over 200 collegiate skiers staying at it
-This article is desperately written early in the morning before we get our shred on