So like every one else, my relationship has its ups and downs. Lately, one of the downs has been a bedroom issue (I'll try not to be too graphic). You see my girlfriend and I often engage in fellatio, from which she pulls the ol' "finger trick". I'm not ashamed to say it, it's feels great and makes the fireworks a lot better. The problem though, is she's sick of seeing my hairy, ashy skin. I've already shaved but the ashiness of course still remains. So my question is what's the cheapest anal bleach I can buy? I'm looking for the cheapest alternative (preferably something I can order online to save myself from that "cashier-sees-what-i'm-buying shame), even household means. Can I use regular old bleach to bleach my arsehole, or should I go with something store bought? I'm looking to spend under 5 dollars, any help???
T "It's my storm. I can make it do whatever I want."
"What the fuck is wrong with you kids?! How would you like it if I came and had sex in front of your house?"
"I heard you guys banned a chick with thyroid cancer cause she was weird looking.
You guys are fucking terrible."- awsomoz$
We were all expecting something GRAND for our massive efforts down the line. Needless to say, all the money went to drive us 100km from home and play frisbee golf for a week at a "resort" aimed for trips for retarded people"
Ive made a career of bleaching assholes. I can give you a few simple tips for no charge. The main thing to avoid is the plunger effect. This is when you are upside down pouring a bottle of bleach into your asshole and you "open up" so to speak. Then, a good amount of bleach will be suctioned into your rectum and have its way with your insides. My main tip is to wait until you need to take a shit. Push it to the brink without releasing it, and then start the bleaching process. The log of shit will act like a cork, and keep bleach from seeping down into your ass.
You can use regular bleach, just make sure to drink it, the cells you are targeting are near the basal lamina, the layer on which the epithelium of the skin sits, if you apply directly to the skin the bleach will have to pass many layers to reach the target cells so you will not get a uniform result.
Drinking it leads to a faster and more uniform bleaching since the bleach is absorbed directly into the bloodstream and neutralizes the body's ability to reject the bleach by sweating. The bleach only affects the most productive melanocytes which are located near the rectum and besides stunting their melanin production also flushes away any excess melanin.
if you start hearing names of the places that don't show up in the trail map, you've just found the people you need to talk too
Death to America............ and butter sauce
If you gon live like a bitch, you gon die like a bitch
I knew a guy who was on trannysurprise.com.. thats where they set you up with a girl, then you find out shes a tranny, surprise! He fucked her anyway. We all laughed. Then asked the guy who discovered this why he was on trannysurprise.com
"Just posts a lot of dick pics, the thread will get deleted and you wont even have to pm a mod."-SFB
"More tranny than a pride parade."-METH-CANCER
"We're always living in the glory days, we just look backwards with rose-colored glasses."-Mosseau
Clearly you've had your finger up a mans ass hole before.
And OP your gonna need a carrot and a bleach pen
1. Insert carrot directly into rectum
2. Apply generous amount of bleach(using your bleach pen) directly to sphincter.
3. Go outside point your ass up into the air, as to let the solar radiation set the bleach.
4. After 20 minutes ass up in the sun, remove carrot and feed it to your girlfriend.