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March, 2024

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Favorite/Funny Pickup Lines

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Hodor
Posts: 503 - Karma: 2,578
Post your favorite/ most funny pickup lines. I heard one the other day that I thought was hilarious.

"On a scale of 1 to America, how free are you tonight?"

Jul 31 2013 9:53AM
189 41
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Huck_Norris
Posts: 11487 - Karma: 18,627
Hey baby does this rag smell like chloroform to you??


Jul 31 2013 10:00AM
7 2
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Peachbutt
Posts: 623 - Karma: 601
"So, did it hurt?"

"What?"

"When you fell from heaven"
Jul 31 2013 10:03AM
2 5
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pat_in_the_hat
Posts: 3019 - Karma: 2,695
I heard you lost your virginity.
Can I play with the box it came in?

Jul 31 2013 10:28AM
15 0
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.AR6rider.
Posts: 15976 - Karma: 8,799
Haaayyyyy Girrrllll, is that a repost in your pocket? Probabl not, cause it looks like you know how to handle a search bar.
Jul 31 2013 10:44AM
10 16
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sNaubi
Posts: 1633 - Karma: 2,357
A life without you is like a broken pencil.
Pointless.
Jul 31 2013 11:25AM
1 2
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QuantumMechanic
Posts: 1029 - Karma: 891
Buttsecks?
Jul 31 2013 6:13PM
4 1
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NPF
Posts: 5152 - Karma: 12,116
hey girl come over here and sit on my lap. we can talk about the first thing that comes up.

you can call me Nemo, because im never afraid to touch the butt

you are on my list of many things i would do for a Klondike bar

are your ankles having a party? because I think your pants should come on down

Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?


Jul 31 2013 6:24PM
6 0
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Animal.Party
Posts: 311 - Karma: 158
as long a I have a face, you have a place to sit.
Jul 31 2013 6:43PM
13 0
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ConnorD
Posts: 167 - Karma: 109
"wanna grab a pizza and fuck?"
"No?... Yeah i dont like pizza either.."
Jul 31 2013 6:45PM
7 0
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Laurent.
Posts: 10054 - Karma: 25,277
"You'll do."
Jul 31 2013 6:46PM
26 1
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Rafiki
Posts: 3858 - Karma: 2,251
"are you from china? cuz i'm wonderin' if you china suck dis dick"
Jul 31 2013 6:47PM
9 0
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brotherdad
Posts: 2076 - Karma: 13,066
Are you from China? Because you're built like complete shit.
Jul 31 2013 7:12PM
6 3
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Chewy.
Posts: 4113 - Karma: 4,856
If that leg is Christmas and that leg is New Years, can I visit you between the holidays?
Jul 31 2013 7:36PM
2 0
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pmw
Posts: 5760 - Karma: 829
Baby, your fathers a thief. He stole the stars from heaven and put them in your eyes :*
Jul 31 2013 7:44PM
3 1
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arnie_grape
Posts: 3428 - Karma: 11,371
hey my dick just died can I bury it in your ass?

if you were a triangle you'd be acute one.
Jul 31 2013 7:50PM
4 0
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SamwiseTheGamgee
Posts: 686 - Karma: 817
I like my women how I like my rocks...IN SCOTCH
Jul 31 2013 7:54PM
0 0
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J-C
Posts: 1138 - Karma: 3,683
If I was a watermelon would you spit or swallow my seeds?
Jul 31 2013 8:05PM
5 0
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shredched
Posts: 309 - Karma: 483
Damn gurl, you shit wid dat ass?

Dou you like fitness?
how bout you try fitness dick in your mouth.
Jul 31 2013 10:37PM
2 1
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Spicy.Cat
Posts: 479 - Karma: 706
Ayee gurrl, let me put some Nutella on dat ass
Jul 31 2013 11:53PM
1 1
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Jro.
Posts: 628 - Karma: 655
are you from Australia? Because i want to slap u with my penis
Aug 1 2013 12:05AM
15 0
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NPF
Posts: 5152 - Karma: 12,116
Ayo girl when you gonna let me tap dat?
Aug 1 2013 12:10AM
1 4
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*ninja*
Posts: 2108 - Karma: 1,143
can i pee in your butt?
Aug 1 2013 12:10AM
2 2
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Calb3rt
Posts: 6005 - Karma: 2,202
Is that a keg in your pants? because i want to tap that ass.

saw it in an old freeze mag the other day.
Aug 1 2013 12:16AM
1 0
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Brule.
Posts: 3846 - Karma: 5,658
Gurl are you a beaver, cuz DAAAAAAAAM.
Aug 1 2013 12:18AM
6 0
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JeremyClarkson
Posts: 1599 - Karma: 1,929
"Are you black? 'cause you just stole my heart."
Aug 1 2013 2:02AM
7 0
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SamtheEagle
Posts: 1658 - Karma: 713
Your like a buffet. I'll lay you on a table and take what I want.
Aug 1 2013 2:17AM
0 0
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jaredmdub
Posts: 2229 - Karma: 564
"There are 20 letters in the alphabet right?"

"No. 26."

"Oh shit! I forgot U R A Q T."

"Awwww, but that's only 25."

"Yeah. I was going to give you the D later."
Aug 1 2013 3:55AM
6 0
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trill
Posts: 297 - Karma: 1,670

My go to pick up line. Almost always works

Aug 1 2013 6:03AM
2 0
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HolySchimmel
Posts: 1601 - Karma: 1,297
Click for larger image

Just kiddin, there are some quite funny ones in here!
Aug 2 2013 12:53AM
5 0
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J-C
Posts: 1138 - Karma: 3,683
Another one : hey girl are you a jungle cuz ima explore you
Aug 2 2013 5:59PM
0 0
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KJacks
Posts: 440 - Karma: 2,329
Are your parents retarded because your special??

Person favourite from SimplePickup:
YOUR MAKING MY DARK KNIGHT RISE

or just say hey your fucking hot we should bang
Aug 2 2013 6:47PM
0 0
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SFB
Posts: 8895 - Karma: 26,346
can i put my pee pee in your vee vee?
Aug 2 2013 7:14PM
1 1
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Shark.
Posts: 3158 - Karma: 270
nice shoes, wanna fuck?
Aug 2 2013 7:23PM
4 0
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Kreech
Posts: 4178 - Karma: 3,024
How do you like your eggs in the morning? Fertilized?
Aug 2 2013 7:30PM
1 0
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Spicy.Cat
Posts: 479 - Karma: 706
On first date:
Hand the girl the day after pill
"lets get this out of the way now"
Aug 21 2013 9:19PM
0 0
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rememberscott
Posts: 1291 - Karma: 5,199
Hi my name is Jake but you can call me anytime ;)

Nice legs, what time do they open?

My dick just died can I bury it in your ass?

100 more
Aug 21 2013 9:31PM
1 0
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elinde
Posts: 1459 - Karma: 2,934
DAMNNNNNNN GIRLLLLLLLLL YOU GOT SUM FINE ASS TITTIES
Aug 21 2013 11:02PM
1 0
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coolflash8
Posts: 3171 - Karma: 2,046
my cock just died, can i bury it in your ass?
Aug 21 2013 11:16PM
0 0
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Dan.
Posts: 7201 - Karma: 1,126
the best pickup line is cocaine.
Aug 22 2013 3:16AM
1 0
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Benson.
Posts: 2739 - Karma: 3,787
"Do you like tapes and CDs?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Cuz Imma tape my dick to your forehead so you can see deez nuts!"
Aug 22 2013 3:29AM
0 0
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Benson.
Posts: 2739 - Karma: 3,787
"Are you a Jehovah's Witness? Cuz Imma bend Jehovah so you can witness this D."
Aug 22 2013 3:30AM
0 0
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ski-swagga
Posts: 5276 - Karma: 219
Nice virginity, can i have it?
Aug 22 2013 3:57AM
0 0
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pat_in_the_hat
Posts: 3019 - Karma: 2,695
do you like dragons??

cause im guna be draggin dez nuts across your face
Aug 22 2013 9:44AM
0 0
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Royal-bamboo
Posts: 294 - Karma: 105
Uh are you from like Idaho cause your the only potato I see......
Aug 22 2013 11:44AM
1 0
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Jessie406
Posts: 170 - Karma: 328
" i am bigger and better than the Titanic... Only 200 women went down on that"
Aug 22 2013 12:25PM
2 0
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BertBoyd
Posts: 734 - Karma: 2,253
If I were a stop light, I'd turn red everytime you passed by, just so I could stare at you a bit longer.
Aug 22 2013 2:38PM
0 0
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Agamemnon
Posts: 310 - Karma: 3,399
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my dick in your ass.
Sep 6 2013 9:42AM
1 0
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