Ever since I can remember I have had some serious issues with self respect and just generally feeling unhappy about everything, however I would never admit it since I didn't want to think of myself as a whiny little bitch. Well this week I feel like this has finally caught up with me, earlier I found out someone I knew committed suicide (a couple years ago one of my friends also committed suicide) and the girl I've been with has been seeing other guys.
When I first heard about all this I decided the best thing was to do what I really enjoy and record music which usually makes me feel good but for some reason after sitting down and working on a song I'll get very agitated and end up deleting everything out of frustration. I've tried going skateboarding as well but I end up freaking out constantly at small falls and such. This is all pretty new to me, I'm usually very relaxed and calm about everything but it feels like ten years of hiding shit is catching up to me and I can't keep my composure. I've also only had about four hours of sleep the past couple of nights so that may be adding to my stress but I can't really fix that at all seeing as I'm too strung out to sleep at all.
To be honest there really isn't a point to this thread, I don't really believe any of you guys can help me but I'd appreciate any comments (except maybe the "fuck off" comments.) Once again sorry for creating another stupid thread, I just really wanted to get some of this stuff out there.
