my school's dining hall sucks. they charge like 50k a year to go there so i should have trained dogs wearing monocles and waistcoats serving me lobster whilst walking on their hind legs and telling dry jokes. instead it's esmerelda yelling at me for taking too much overcooked salmon. god dammit esmerelda i need the protein.- Gator.
I got a pm for Obama and he gave me the nuclear lunch codes and told me North Korea scammed him out of a first edition lohi and I was like do we should nuke North Korea and he was like nah not now.
Not claiming I'm being 100% serious
Yeah, well, I got an email from a Nigerian Prince this morning...
Opinions are like nipples, everybody has one. Some have firm points, others are barely discernible through layers, and some are displayed at every opportunity regardless of whether the audience has stated "I am interested in your nipples" or not - David Thorne