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Best comebacks youve heard.

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elemeno89
Posts: 1582 - Karma: 79
now i know that a few times people on this website can get into a squabble or two every now and then. so i want to see what the best comebacks you've used or you have heard someone use before.

for me i got into it with a dude at a bar, and his girl was getting all up in ma grill so i said:

"if i want any lip from you ill rattle my zipper."

the guy laughed and we went our separate ways as he couldn't fight a guy who just cracked a joke. needless to say the broad wasn't too happy about it.

now you guys.
Jan 25 2013 3:29PM
2 3
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Jblz
Posts: 556 - Karma: 206
if i wanted my comeback id make myself throw up
Jan 25 2013 3:32PM
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.AR6rider.
Posts: 15976 - Karma: 8,799
Yeah, the Goon was a pretty good movie, huh?
Jan 25 2013 3:32PM
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BertBoyd
Posts: 734 - Karma: 2,253
"I had fun fucking your mom last night" and i reply with "2 dads"
Jan 25 2013 3:33PM
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onLINE
Posts: 1013 - Karma: 423
how do you spell cum in that sentance?
Jan 25 2013 3:34PM
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Stickity
Posts: 7750 - Karma: 769
your mom goes to college
Jan 25 2013 3:35PM
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mathmansam
Posts: 293 - Karma: 40
how do you spell sentence in that english?
Jan 25 2013 3:36PM
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Thadius.Castle
Posts: 1436 - Karma: 250
Best comeback in the world. Most people don't even remember what it's from.
Jan 25 2013 3:38PM
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JzD.
Posts: 1615 - Karma: 153
If I wanted my come back I would've wiped it off your mother's lips
Jan 25 2013 3:39PM
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Pancake_Fucker
Posts: 1833 - Karma: 1,880
If I wanted my come back I would have told your mother not to swallow.
Jan 25 2013 3:40PM
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miroz
Posts: 10333 - Karma: 3,947
From Aiden-G, now NeedleDick:

"A dude yelled at me that he banged my mom. My comeback was I hollowed out his carcass then used him as a puppet on my traveling stand up comedy tour, 'Aidan and the dead guy' "

And another from the ski lift insult thread:

Venonat: "This kid threw his poles at my friend on the lift. He caught one of them, broke it in half over his thigh and threw it back at the kid..."

The cum back one is classic doe.
Jan 25 2013 3:41PM
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elemeno89
Posts: 1582 - Karma: 79
?
Jan 25 2013 3:48PM
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Puns
Posts: 2052 - Karma: 429
I've actually never heard a comeback that didn't make me think the person who said it was trying way too hard
Jan 25 2013 4:01PM
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Sno.
Posts: 12155 - Karma: 6,147
I'm sorry, but everyone remembers what that's from. Unless your typical argument is with middle schoolers.
Jan 25 2013 4:12PM
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grown-ninja
Posts: 3031 - Karma: 175
Your wife/gf tastes like honey nut cheerios-
Jan 25 2013 4:16PM
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RimJobber
Posts: 3313 - Karma: 10,058
Jokes on you, he's gay.
Jan 25 2013 4:20PM
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whoa-dere
Posts: 10596 - Karma: 7,100
your mom

no u
Jan 25 2013 4:21PM
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wreck.yoself
Posts: 656 - Karma: 46
YO MOMMAS GOT GOLD NIPPLES
Jan 25 2013 4:37PM
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E__
Posts: 5751 - Karma: 4,633
Was one of the more memorable lines from that movie. That's probably where you got it from or heard someone say it who had seen it.
Jan 25 2013 11:14PM
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Wallisch_pl
Posts: 5260 - Karma: 1,022
if someone takes your comeback say "if I wanted my comeback I would've wiped it off of your moms chin"
Jan 25 2013 11:17PM
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Pancake_Fucker
Posts: 1833 - Karma: 1,880
See my post way earlier.
Jan 25 2013 11:20PM
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Nacho+
Posts: 3748 - Karma: 7,791
can someone embed this for me +k


<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/hcC3cEuXIVI" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
Jan 25 2013 11:22PM
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Wallisch_pl
Posts: 5260 - Karma: 1,022
oooooooooo
Jan 25 2013 11:34PM
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Pancake_Fucker
Posts: 1833 - Karma: 1,880
They were similar. I want half credit at least mofucka.
Jan 25 2013 11:35PM
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loomis
Posts: 945 - Karma: 176
Oooh BURN!! ;)
Jan 26 2013 12:52AM
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crab_pretzel
Posts: 3919 - Karma: 622
ha still makes me lol

but here, i found a better version of it
Jan 26 2013 12:58AM
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XtRemE11
Posts: 5680 - Karma: 268
the best ones are when you insult yourself. my go to comeback is "im gay"
Jan 26 2013 2:54AM
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KLovelace
Posts: 2118 - Karma: 289
you're a towel
Jan 26 2013 3:34AM
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Stickity
Posts: 7750 - Karma: 769
it's just barely under everyone's radar so they know it if you explain it but they probably won't know it off the top of their head
Jan 26 2013 4:00AM
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maximiliaan
Posts: 7710 - Karma: 2,849
my sister had the best one ive heard.

she was walking when she passed the "cool kids" hanging around when one of them yelled to her, oh look its the stupid little sister of that fucktard seb! (seb is my brother) my sister replied to him, "ive fucked your mother yesterday! and you know what? she sucked ass!"

she was 14 years at that time, so 11 years ago and all the your mother jokes werent overused by then.
Jan 26 2013 5:13AM
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Puns
Posts: 2052 - Karma: 429
The US was like, shit terrorists! And this guy was like hey US you're 8 times more likely to be killed by a police officer.
Jan 26 2013 10:36PM
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SFB
Posts: 8895 - Karma: 26,346
try not to use that one because once you use that. you win. hands down.
Jan 26 2013 10:50PM
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E-Nix
Posts: 382 - Karma: 187
I know that the your mom ones have already been overused in this thread but oh well. I've heard your sister is really good at cumbacks.
Jan 26 2013 11:16PM
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Puns
Posts: 2052 - Karma: 429
Click for larger image
Jan 26 2013 11:30PM
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daannnnieel
Posts: 5163 - Karma: 4,293
It's not really a comeback, but whenever someones insulting me, I agree with them and add things onto what they were previously saying.
Jan 26 2013 11:40PM
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