To start things off, please bear with me through the thread. Please don't just jump in and start hating. This isnt a fuckin joke
. There will be NO SPARKNOTES
. You either take some time to read it or you dont, thats up to you. Im not to sure how I want this to turn out so im sorry if it jumps around a bit but im goin with the flow as everything comes to me. I would like to add that I am 100% sober right now.
This week has been pretty fuckin hard for friends and I.....one of our friends Daniel Levy committed suicide after a long struggle with a mental illness about a week ago. Shits so hard to handle and understand and to be honest, I think I may understand now. It hit everyone pretty hard when we all found out. I remember sitting in my car drinking a 40 and getting the text and just being speechless, the rest of that night is basically a blur to me so I obviously cant tell you what really happened after that. The only way I reacted was to drink heavily as did the rest of us.
Ive cried my eyes out, put holes in my wall, drank heavily obviously as stated above, but non of it changes what happened. This kid had so much fucking talent in the art world and was just a good down to earth kid that never wanted to hurt anyone ever. To be honest I wish I was way closer to him and it feels terrible to say that after the fact. I wish I could have taken his place sometimes....he could have gone places that I never would have, im 21 years old and all I do is work, ski, and drink. Why the fuck is it always someone that has shit going for them?
Im going back to the thread title in this part. Ive always looked at suicide as a selfish act, because thats what everyone around me has ever said. My mind was totally blown away by what his father had to say at his wake. He gave the most beautiful speech I have ever heard in my life to this day. I will be honest I dont remember most of what he said right now, I just remember standing there next to all his friends and family in awe and almost instantly just feeling a sense of happiness. Ill try to sum it up as best as I can.
He basically said that Dan has been struggling all his life with his illness. He has been in and out of mental hospitals most of his life, weather it be willingly or him being dragged there. After a while, this was not helping home cope with everything. Dan decided that it was time to end his struggle and the only way to do that was by taking his own life. Words fail to give real shape to Dan's tragic exit from our lives. While his illness conquered him in this world, his lengthy struggle and death was heroic. He did this for himself, his friends, and his family so that he/we did not have to watch him suffer any longer. Daniel is now in the better place that he wanted to be in and he is extremely happy. Whatever Dan is doing right now, im sure it was worth what he had to do to make the ultimate sacrifice.
This is why I titled this thread "Suicide can be a beautiful thing." Even though we may be hurting right now, he made the ultimate sacrifice for himself, his friends, and his family. This wasnt just about him, this was about everyone around him. I know that he is so fucking happy right now where ever he is. I am crying as I type out this whole thread, but they are not tears of sadness, they are tears of joy because I now know Dan is at peace. I will never forget you Dan, we all love and miss you. Until we meet again on the other side, I will try to be the best person I can be. Im not sure what I wanted this thread to be, but I dont want it to be sad even though it seems that way. Thank you for reading.
Id like you guys to meet Dan, and if you could just take a second, close your eyes and say... RIP Daniel Levy. He is in my thoughts, and now your thoughts. I Love You
Now for my second part to this thread. Id like to make some shout outs to some of the members of NS ive either dealt with or noticed. If I know your first name, im going to post it next to your NS name. I hope you dont mind. I dont mean to be weird or creepy, hopefully it just puts a smile on your face or gives you a quick laugh. It's pretty crazy how even through the internet people can still effect you. If you have seen someone else make an intellegent post around the forums, help someone else out, or is just a cool dude feel free to contribute. Lets brighten everyones
- I sold this guy some skis about a week ago right as this was all happening. It took me some time to actually get the skis shipped. I told him what was happening after a few days of not speaking with him. I was afraid that he would get super pissed at me/call me out/ think I was just making up excuses of why I hadnt shipped out. He actually took it very well and never gave me any problems or bitching at all while I went through this. I did ship out the skis, maybe about a week after payment. It means more to me than you know that you didnt freak the fuck out like most people on here would. For that im throwing together some goodies for you that I will ship out when I can. Again thank you so much for being understanding about the situation.
- I remember when I first met you in the Library in High School. We looked at each other and realized we were both on NS. We didnt talk to each other in person...but through NS. I always found that funny. It was nice to see you come back for Dan, especially on such short notice. I wish we coulda been better friends back in the day cause youre a mad chill kid. Hopefully you will be back soon on different terms so we can get white boy wasted again. If you ever need to talk, im only a phone call away.
- Always hookin it up and got me addicted to ///Surface. Im looking forward to purchasing another pair for next season.
///Surfaceskis (Ski Company)
- What can I say? Im in love. Ill never buy another ski again. this will be my 3rd year shreddin with Watchlifes, LL2's, and the No Times. Without you, I cant ski. <3
- Who else wants to break shit and do stupid stuff with me. Dirtbikes, Bikes, Trucks, Fires, stealing my dads fourwheeler with a swis army knife and getting it stuck for 2 days in mud up to my knees. These are memories ill laugh about with my kids one day. I know you work alot now and im not always around but we gotta get up to Whiteface soon and shred.
- Damn gurlll you know just how to choke me when im drunk, youre dating dane so you both come as a package deal. Always fun as hell to be around and hopefully we can just forget about that situation with your sister at my apartment that always gets brought up ;)
- Who can tear kids apart better on NS than you? Everyone thinks your an asshole, but you dont fuck around and just get straight to the point. Mo Fuckin n00bs dont know how to internet.
Perhaps (Marco) -
My girlfriends brother....we dont really talk at all, im not too sure why, but thanks for hooking me up with the First Drop. Super warm, Super comfy and looks awesome. Maybe Marissa and I can get out to Stowe to ski for a day.
- I remember one time on NSchat I said you were attractive. You noticed me(lol) and appreciated it because you said most people dont think you are. Keep yo head up and throw a smile on girl cause you gorgeous ;)
- Everyone hattin on you sometimes, I dont understand why. Your a chill kid and always makin me laugh. Fuck tha haters, lets shred Mnt. Snow one of these days. dat azzz (not sure if you will remember this one lol)
- I wanted to thank you for hiring me at West and giving me the opportunity to meet a ton of greats kids/people. Its unfortunate that I turned 21 a year too late. Hope youre lovin Utah! Lemme get in on that Beta test for that game ;)
- You probably dont know me, but back in the day when I first started skiing, you were that silly guy with the snowblades and bright ass yellow pants at Gore. I remember everyone talking about you like you were tom walisch and when you were starting up EC Headwear hand making hats, which probably is what got me into crocheting(nahhh I did it fo tha ladiezz) jkjk
- I remmeber the first time I saw "Hey there, how are things?" Best line ive ever heard, in fact I still use it to this day, hope you dont mind.
- Ive always wondered why not just Jane? whats with the 6? Why not 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 7, 8, 9, 0? Possibly something to do with your birthday? Who knows, maybe we are about to find out.
- You have some amazing artwork. I bought one of your hoodies(the one with the tree that has the skier and all the seasons) It was so awesome and comfy, everyone used to compliment me on it. Unfortunatly I sold it to another NSer cause I needed some quick cash. If anyone has one and would like to sell plz let me know.
- Mad good times, Waste, always have a story to tell and probably one of the nicest guys I know. Its unfortunate you live so far away cause its always good times when youre around. Come back to Saratoga soon, its pretty chill. Keystone Swag. Take it easy on the hill, Ive had to pick you up at the hospital/ski patrol enough times, what are you gonna do without me? haha
SLAMPIG (Dylan) -
- I was at work the otherday and my boss called my coworker a "Buck wheat'. As soon as I heard it I thought of NS. just throwin it out there.
- NSChat2 times. You kill it at guitar. Pretty sure youre in med school, that shits crazy. I remember one time I was poundin a handle of captain morgan and you said I was a boss. In reality it was me just being a borderline alcoholic. Youre one of the members that I notice that makes actual intelligent comments and actually know what youre talking about.
- Mad good at skating. I know there are other gay members on here but I feel like your the most open about it than anyone else. That takes some fuckin balls man and I envy you for that. Props
- nigga you cray
- DAT ACCENT! I remember the first time I heard you talk I was like "yeahhh, ima marry a girl that talks that way"
phnee (Daphnee) -
I forgot what your name is now Daphinetly? I always thought to myself "Godamn this girl sure loves her weed" I dont smoke very often, but I told you I did once and you said you were "like a proud mama" haha. WEED.
Those are some people I know IRL and some randoms thrown in. I could go on and on but ill stop here. might come back for some more later. Hopefully chuckles were had. Also one request. can someone post that .gif of that mute rapper guy in the white shirt doin that stupid dance please. love that .gif and I want it here. Thank you for stoping by.