"why are you wearing a man dress? i thought those were for girls?"
-An anonymous five year old who i was teaching to ski asking me about my tall t
"skiing is so masculine that it needs to be counteracted by a touch of femininity."
-the old gaper guy next to the lesson i was teaching in the lift line
"chicken pot pie....my three favorite things" -Tom Warnick
"Expect a lengthened ban if you complain to me." -Rowen
"i think i could have sex with your parents and it wouldn't be considered cougar hunting. with that said, i look forward to being your step parent but never admitting to it and instead beating you while i'm drunk off captain morgan's finest; you fucking douche bags." -skiierman