something that happened today:
i parked my car and started to walk towards my friend ana's house with her to go smoke.
like 3 houses down from where i parked, a cat approaches us.
i decide run up and pretend like im gonna kick the cat like a ball, very normal thing to do.
a second later (after i didnt actually kick the cat) i hear a window open next to me and a huuuge dude who looks like a hobo (large scraggly beard/clothing) starts yelling
THHATTTS MY CATT MOTHER FUCKER IM GONNA KICK YOUR ASS!!!!!!! MOTHERFUCKER YOURE ASKING FOR IT
like super in my face, and then a second later...
as we're walking away
he runs out of his house with A MOTHERFUCKING BASEBALL BAT
starts swinging it and chasing me:
and saying "motherfucker your want this?
you want this?"
and i told him to chill cuz i wasnt actually gonna kick his cat.
and i even yelled at him to go home (which i immediately regretted)
but i was scared so i took out my phone in case i needed to dial for the po-po
and then i ran to her house for cover.
needless to say, i was frightened to walk back to my car after smoking, so i took my friend with me and went the opposite way around the block to avoid walking in front of his house again.
Then after I'm treading water for a long time a clown in scuba gear starts bobbing up to me. It stopped when it was right in front of me, I got really confused so we were staring at each other for a while. Then after some awkward staring the clown took off its scuba mask looked at me for a few more seconds then the clown opens its mouth makes the sound a dolphin makes then sprays a jet of water at my face. Then I woke up and I was like "what the hell just happened"